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"Smarty Jones: If TAR has NELs, I want a do-over!"
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RealityMom 560 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Reality Show Commentator"

05-14-05, 12:27 PM (EST)
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"Smarty Jones: If TAR has NELs, I want a do-over!"
LAST EDITED ON 05-14-05 AT 12:29 PM (EST)

This is breaking news on both Court TV and ESPN as once again the worlds of sports and justice collide. Smarty Jones, who had been widely favored last year, is suing the Belmont Racetrack for dashing his hopes of winning the Triple Crown. He told his story to Robert Redford, who is in fact a real horse whisperer. As Smarty said, "I was 'Robbed'. If TAR can have NELS, then I deserve a do-over"! When asked why he didn't bring his suit in a more timely fashion, Smarty beat out one year with his hoof, stating that he was within the Statute of Limitations, and most importantly, that he'd just started watching TAR this season because he's a huge Rob and Amber fan, so until now, he didn't know that you could lose and still get a second chance. Smarty's more than willing to surrender his silks. He's requesting an immediate summary judgment. If he has to wait the years it takes for a suit to be heard, he'll be too old to race and his stud value would be nil.
Belmont, to avoid huge legal costs and years of debate has agreed to change the rules:
Now four year olds can race.
All horses can try again, even those who finish last.
Horses who don't make it to the gate in time, will have the
gate opened for them.
Guides can accompany the horses on the track.
Jockeys must be bilingual.
As a background for those who don't remember the story, although his fans were legion, Smarty was heavily favored. He was treated like a real celebrity. The track was closed so that he could train without distraction. At the Belmont, he started the race in great fashion, but failed where it mattered most- at the finish line. Did he get distracted, lose his way, no one's sure what happened. None of his team was smoking a victory cigar when it was over. Birdstone, the winner, when asked how he felt about Smarty's claims, said he(Birdstone) was the "good" one and really deserved it. Now, his bloodline will go on, too.
The court system now fears that the floodgates have opened for do-overs in all areas of life. Olympians who didn't get the gold will probably bring class actions. Overly passionate Little League parents will demand that their kids get another chance to catch the ball .
We will keep you informed as this story develops.

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  Subject     Author     Message Date     ID  
 RE: Smarty Jones: If TAR has NELs, ... Dakota 05-14-05 1
   RE: Smarty Jones: If TAR has NELs, ... RealityMom 05-14-05 2

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Dakota 5819 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

05-14-05, 07:23 PM (EST)
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1. "RE: Smarty Jones: If TAR has NELs, I want a do-over!"
ROFL! One problem. I looooove Smarty Jones. Romber, not so much. (And the term "summary judgment" tells me you're probably a lawyer. Not that that's a bad thing.) You may recall Tanya Harding and her laces -- she got a second chance and lost. And wasn't there a football team that kept getting to Super Bowl and losing? And then there's Toni - Love Cruise, Blind Date, Paradise Hothell - never won.

Charter Member: Club Anti-DAW

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RealityMom 560 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Reality Show Commentator"

05-14-05, 09:23 PM (EST)
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2. "RE: Smarty Jones: If TAR has NELs, I want a do-over!"
Dakota,
Thanks for the laughs! I have to say that I do love Romber but that it was a lot of fun doing this parody because I googled Smarty to get my facts right and read some great stuff about him. It's one of the great sports stories, even without the Triple Crown. If you think about it and while ice skating is my favorite olympic event, Michelle Kwan has basically been having do-overs for half her life. I plead guilty to having a law degree but I never really practiced while my kids were growing up and now I have my own very small, not too money-making business. But you can get a pretty good legal vocabulary watching tv.
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