Disclaimer: appologies to all of you that have read this before, but I've been informed that this is a classic OT story, one that shall remain in Slice-infamy for many years; It needs a third retelling. To those of you who are lucky enough to have never heard this tale, I hope you're sitting down, and have no real emotional attachment to breakfast food. I'm going to ruin it for you.

Ahh, the Pancake movie. Where should I begin?

Well, it was sixth grade, and Rye Country Day decided that this was the year to roll out the "WTF is happening to my body" videos; you know, the frequently crappy movies with a terrifically low budget that explain the apparent joy of pubic hair and monthly bleeding... but I digress.

The garbage that the lucky 11-year-old girls would watch was a cinematic masterpiece entitled "I Got IT!" For all of you lucky enough to have experienced your periods, doesn't this emotional outburst just totally sum up the joy you get when you cramp and bleed and wanna tear off peoples' limbs?

Me neither. But I digress.

Anyway, the plot centers on a girl, who we'll call Suzie. Suzie is going to a slumber party at her friend Becky's house, along with some other girl who says approximately 3 words, I'm certain which involve the word "period." Long story short, (too late! - brief side note: who else loves the movie Clue?) Suzie gets her period in the middle of the night.

Frantic to find something to stop her new... emm... womanhood from leaking all over the place, Suzie roots through Becky's bathroom, digging like a rabid badger to find some kind of feminine device.

Cue entrance of Becky's psycho mom

Becky's Psycho Mom, who we'll just call Mom, finds Suzie uprooting the bathroom, and asks insightfully, "Are you looking for something, Suzie?" Suzie states, loud n' proud, that she's looking for where Becky keeps her pads...

Mom ecstatically replies, "SUZIE?!? DID YOU GET YOUR PERIOD?"

Suzie politely nods, with an unenthusiastic yes. Clearly, she has noticed Mom's insanity. This will probably be the last time Suzie sleeps over at this house... Mom goes to prepare hot chocolate, and the two sit at the kitched table, presumably post Suzie's pad-putting-on, clinking mugs together in a celebratory fashion.

The next morning, Suzie tells Becky and no-speaky-girl about her period. No-speaky mumbles something about not getting her period yet and being jealous; Becky merely tells Suzie that she's lucky it didn't start while she was in class... How embarrassing! The girls then head to the kitchen for breakfast...

Warning: this is where it gets really grody. You've been given a heads up... I hope you don't like pancakes too much, because you'll never want them again...

Mom's hunched over the griddle making... something... she then calls the girls over; innocently, they think, oh good! Mom's made pancakes for breakfast. Well, they were right about that... except...

The effing pancake is shaped like the female reproductive system oh my god my eyes

As if this weren't bad enough, Mom then uses the pancakuterus to explain to the three now-traumatized girls how their period works. Frankly, if I were Becky, the only thing that could embarrass me more than this is if dad strolled in with a plate of sausages and eggs, ready to explain how penises work.

Then, in an ultimate moment of ecch-ness, the girls EAT THE UTERUS-CAKE

Now. I hope that delve into my emotional pain helped explain everything. This is the pancake movie, accept no substitutes.

Official OT lifeguard - Let's keep things PG-13, people.

• RE: The Pancake Movie - Yes, a repost,sleeeve, 02:49 AM, 11-12-03
  • RE: The Pancake Movie - Yes, a repost,J Slice, 02:52 AM, 11-12-03
• RE: The Pancake Movie - Yes, a repost,woeisme1, 03:02 AM, 11-12-03
• Other who share your pain...,IceCat, 04:42 AM, 11-12-03
  • I thank God,moonbaby, 09:27 AM, 11-12-03
• RE: The Pancake Movie - Yes, a repost,Draco Malfoy, 07:58 AM, 11-12-03
  • RE: The Pancake Movie - Yes, a repost,Esbea, 08:49 AM, 11-12-03
  • RE: The Pancake Movie - Yes, a repost,nailbone, 11:13 AM, 11-12-03
• ROTFLMAO!!!,northernlights, 09:01 AM, 11-12-03
• RE: The Pancake Movie - Yes, a repost,Drive My Car, 09:14 AM, 11-12-03
• LOL!,Breezy, 09:46 AM, 11-12-03
• Oh man!!,nailbone, 11:13 AM, 11-12-03
• RE: The Pancake Movie - Yes, a repost,ginger, 12:49 PM, 11-12-03
  • RE: The Pancake Movie - Yes, a repost,RollDdice, 00:59 AM, 12-10-03
    • you know what I like with pancakes,ivoryElephant, 06:38 PM, 11-01-04
• RE: The Pancake Movie - Yes, a repost,kidflash212, 02:39 PM, 03-09-15
  • RE: The Pancake Movie - Yes, a repost,Agman2, 10:17 PM, 03-09-15

I didn't read the story, but the title of this post coupled with your sig pic made me really hungry... I wish a had a huge stack of pancakes right now... with syrup... and butter... yum...

I *heart* pancakes!

Pancakes!... Yay!

I'm glad that you already know this story, eee...

What with your silicone sleeeve and all...

Thank dog that you can't find those vidcaps, though...

Official OT lifeguard - Let's keep things PG-13, people.

Thank you for digging this up since I was so lost in the chinese thresd where it was mentioned.

Love your writing!!!

Created by the Godlike hands of IceCat
If you need me you can find me --fantasizing about my reality so I can realize my fantasy......
I was going to refuse to post to you but I realized that if I didn't tell you, how would you know I was ignoring you?--Pythonfan

You are not alone... Here is a list of other people on the net who share similar experiences with the 'Pancake Uterus Video':

http://www.angelfire.com/jazz/swingkitten/autobiography.htm

"Then the trouble started, as we were all required to take sex ed. They split the boys and girls up, and we had to watch weird movies about periods which involved a model of the female reproductive system, made from pancake batter."

http://kensdoll.diaryland.com/020613_70.html

It was really sweet of my mom. Expensive, too. She told me that she wanted to show me what its like to be a woman. Haha, thanks mom... I think this woman stuff should have been shown to me along with the pancake video. That's okay, though- better late than never.

http://www.twistid.com/index.cfm?s=b&v=r (WARNING: This link contains a lot of foul language)

"The name comes from a film on human reproduction girls in my grade school were forced to watch in which the various parts of female anatomy were represented by food items. The uterus happened to be a pancake."

http://www.livejournal.com/users/stupidgibberish/

One night in Louisiana, Jamie and I were talking before bed, and we were remembering things about elementary. The clearest thing I can remember is being put in a room with about 15 other little 10-year-old girls and being forced to watch a movie about puberty. In the movie, there was a mother and a daughter, and the daughter started her period and didn't understand the nature of it. So, while cooking breakfast, the mother explained it to her. With a perfectly shaped uterus pancake.

Jamie asked, "How could anyone actually have a perfectly shaped uterus pancake?"

I replied, "Everyone has a uterus shaped mold, if they're serious about cooking."

I'm not serious about cooking.

And yes, Draco, that new logo on the jersey does look....reproductive

Just so ya know, I. HEART. CLUE.

And on a related note, doesn't the new Stars jersey look kind of... well.. like that as well?

"Why is my thing on fire?"-Karmic Dharma
Start Weight:339 Last Weigh-in:299.5 Loss To Date:-39.5