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Original Message
"CANOE SINKS LOVE CRUISE...."

Posted by SkyRaider on 09-25-01 at 04:16 PM
"Skanky and accidentally insightful" are the leads in this review by Bill Brioux of the Toronto Sun....

Love Cruise has all the elements
needed in today's lowest common
denominator world of reality
television: Horny, nubile young men
and women are invited to shack up
for 48 hours at a time aboard a luxury
yacht. Every two days, they trade
bunk mates and do it all again.

Every other day, one guy and one girl
is tossed over board onto "Loser
Island," where they can presumably
go off and breed a whole race of little
losers.

Make no mistake: Love Cruise is no
Band Of Brothers. This is titillating,
one-track television. But amid all the
boob talk is something you seldom
see on these reality shows: Reality.

A few other boobs on board get
exposed, too. Michael used to weigh
250 pounds and is sure he'll be
picked last for the first date (he is).
Lisa, an attractive divorcee, is tender
about being a month or two older
than some of these other kids. She
wants to bunk with the
dangerous-looking guy with all the
tattoos and doesn't want to end up
with dull Michael. Sorry, Lisa.

Hey! Is this guy calling the Clown a boob?

http://www.canoe.ca/TelevisionShowsL/lovecruise.html



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Messages in this discussion
"RE: CANOE SINKS LOVE CRUISE...."
Posted by George Tirebiter on 09-25-01 at 05:18 PM
LAST EDITED ON 09-25-01 AT 05:24 PM (EST)

Sky, this is too funny--but you left out some of the best parts! (and don't forget to keep reading into the next article) My personal fave:

At one point on Love Cruise, contestants must hold up "B.S." paddles. The B.S. stands for "Balls of Shame." It refers to a little lotto machine on board with balls in it.

It takes balls of shame to go on these shows and it takes balls of shame to produce and air them. And it takes balls of shame to watch.

OMG--just where are we going to find those?! But you Left-Coasters get more time to find out, anyway--last I heard, LC was being delayed until 1 a.m., thanks to baseball on FUX. . . (poor clown oughtta skip the BS and just go heavy on the tranquilizers, at this point. . . Just when you think the network couldn't do any more to ruin his 15 minutes, they think of something else!)

GT

Edited to add: They didn't call him a boob (exactly)--but they DID call him DULL. Now THERE'S a laugh-and-a-half for you! Guess he doesn't convey his true personality as well in the flesh as he does in the written word. . . shakes is a lot of things (many negative) but I daresay he does NOT qualify as "dull" by any stretch of the imagination.


"RE: CANOE SINKS LOVE CRUISE...."
Posted by SkyRaider on 09-25-01 at 05:29 PM
<But you Left-Coasters get more time to find out, anyway--last I heard, LC was being delayed until 1 a.m., thanks to baseball on FUX. . . (poor clown oughtta skip the BS and just go heavy on the tranquilizers, at this point. . . Just when you think the network couldn't do any more to ruin his 15 minutes, they think of something else!)>

I don't know why FUX would bother pre-empting "The Cruise" again especially for baseball since the Dodgers are almost finished off from possibly being in contention for another year, unless it's the interest in seeing if Barry Bad Boy Bonds manages to smack another couple of home runs off of them tonight. I did see in the local paper that Fox Sports Network is going to be showing the next (and last) six Dodger games, so maybe that's where the confusion is coming from?

I'm sure that I'd stay up to watch Love Cruise at 1 AM. Uh-huh. Yeah. Yawn......


"RE: CANOE SINKS LOVE CRUISE...."
Posted by shakes the clown on 09-25-01 at 06:26 PM
>
>Edited to add: They didn't
>call him a boob
>(exactly)--but they DID call him
>DULL. Now THERE'S a laugh-and-a-half
>for you! Guess he doesn't
>convey his true personality as
>well in the flesh as
>he does in the written
>word. . . shakes is
>a lot of things (many
>negative) but I daresay he
>does NOT qualify as "dull"
>by any stretch of the
>imagination.


...calling me dull is about as accurate as calling Osama bin Laden a humanitarian. When I see a review like this I immediately know a few things about the author...one, he hates reality TV, two, he has stereotypical preconceived notions about people and shapes his opinions to fit those stereotypes, and three, he decided to rip the show long before he ever actually saw it.

I've been called many things in my life, but dull is definitely NOT one of them.

And you know what, this isn't even a bad review...he says it sucks cause it is sleazy and hateful...gee, people really hate to see stuff like that on TV, right? IMO, a bad review would be if someone said the show was boring and made you fall asleep, not that it is sleazy, hateful and full of sex. IMO, I have yet to see a single bad review of the show.


"RE: CANOE SINKS LOVE CRUISE...."
Posted by SkyRaider on 09-25-01 at 06:49 PM
<it is sleazy, hateful and full of sex.>

My kind of show! Now if FUX would only serve me beer and Cheetos, I'd be set for the night!


"RE: That's the Spirit Bozo...."
Posted by Dalton on 09-25-01 at 08:27 PM
There is NO SUCH THING as "bad publicity" as long as they spell your name right!! (Somebody famous said that.)

And just so you will know, I have set my VCR to tape 1) Love Cruise and 2) N.Y.P.D. Blues. That puts you right up there with Dennis Franz -- big shoes to fill, imo.

Sleazy sex is hardly ever boring --- unless you don't know what you're doing; and that ain't Mikey's problem.

Dalton


"RE: CANOE SINKS LOVE CRUISE...."
Posted by Cherberrie on 09-25-01 at 08:09 PM

Michael used to weigh 250 pounds and is sure he'll be
picked last for the first date (he is).

Such is life in the fast lane called "15 minutes of fame!"


Cherberrie