Previously on...Survivor!

Although Spencer attempted a brave face about it ("Cool Tribal Council"), he was seriously angry with Kass over her defection from his alliance. Spencer told Kass he wasn't "personally mad" or "upset", he just thought "it was a bad move." When Kass attempted to defend the brainless gameplay, Spencer stopped her short: "Kass, you're talking strategy? Just stop - it's an embarrassment." Kass ridiculously responded that she had just out-maneuvered him, which only made Spencer laugh at her derisively. Kass, rewriting history, gave us an aside that her move was brilliant, eliminating two idols (which were played regardless of her vote) and the player of her choice. She told Spencer she was a "free agent." I'm surprised Spencer didn't laugh in her face again.

Kass: "So I pi$$ed off 5 people, but I gained 5 friends." That's pretty sad. Does she really think they're her friends now? Sadder - does she really ache for friends and to be acknowledged that desperately?

Kass said she was playing with her gut. Spencer: "I'm well aware that you are only playing with your gut." Spencer: "Stupid. Since day one she's been playing like a freaking idiot."

Kass tried to make out her old alliance as the bad guys, but Morgan asked "What did we do?" I'm not sure, either, but that set Kass off on Morgan.

The following morning the tribe needed water and Kass passive-aggressively put the onus on Morgan. "Maybe Morgan can go get it; she's in her usual spot," Kass bitterly groused within earshot of Morgan. Tony asked Morgan, who stated that she didn't mind getting water, but that Kass being rude to her didn't exactly make her want to do it. Kass replied that Morgan had been rude to her, first (which we didn't really see), so of course she would be rude in return. Kass thought Morgan was utterly useless: "old dog pee Morgan, in her own confessional, told us she hadn't been rude, but simply had been ignoring Kass, and that Kass should be used to being ignored by now. Burn! Morgan then spewed her own venom: "She's a bitter, ugly, old lady, and I think she hates me because I'm cuter than her and have always been cuter than her." Jealous

The RC was the classic multi-stage course involving teeter-totters, nets, balance beams, chests (not Morgan's), walls, ropes, and, of course, a puzzle. The challenges have all seemed to come down to the puzzles (and LJ), but I love the physical parts of the challenges - so many opportunities for pratfalls. Even a martial arts expert can flub, as Woo showed falling off the balance beam. This one, too, came down to the puzzle where LJ and Spencer (okay, mostly LJ) demolished Woo and Kass, winning reward for themselves, Morgan, Jefra, and Jeremiah.

At loser camp, Tony pretended he wasn't upset about the loss of Outback Steakhouse steaks, baked potatoes, ice cream, and, apparently, Bacon Pineapple Margaritas: "Double the rice, break out the coconut, let's party!", he stoutly encouraged his companions. I wasn't fooled, however, and Tony's confessional immediately afterwards confirmed my suspicions. I bet Tony was really upset when he heard about those margaritas.

Kass, still trying to convince herself that she hadn't made a colossal screw-up at the last TC: "What if I did make a mistake? So what?" Here's what - you are now trusted by no one, have no chance to win the game, and are viewed by everyone as a goat. But, hey, I'm no stranger to self-deception; you keep telling yourself that, Kass.

Tony & Trish asked Kass who she wanted out next, but Kass wouldn't bite. She did name Spencer as the most dangerous of their enemies.

Tony and Woo decided to initiate their own Special Hidden Immunity Idol (SHII, to those in the know). Tony: "It's a security blanket that I would love to cover myself with." That dude has the weirdest phraseology.

After completely gorging himself on Outback Steakhouse cuisine with an impressive singlemindedness, Spencer finally noticed that his hands were thoroughly soiled, and reached for his napkin absentmindedly. The HII clue nearly fell out onto his plate. Luckily for him, Morgan was distracted, appearing nauseated from her meal and holding her head in her hands, so she didn't see Spencer pocket the clue. Conspiracy theorists have at it, but it seemed the luck of the draw to me. When he picked up the napkin the clue could be seen in the folds, and Spencer did not appear to be expecting it, though, as a "superfan", he certainly should have. Woo did!

With the tribe reunited at camp, the heavens unleashed a downpour. Spencer, concerned over the integrity of the parchment the clue was written on, decided to head out on an idol search in the rain, a la LJ from earlier this season. Spencer picked the wrong storm, however, as the rain slackened, and Woo, knowing the history of Survivor rewards and HII clues, keenly determined that Spencer had probably gotten a clue and headed off to spy on him, #ninjastealthmode style.

Woo followed Spencer, watching him through the foliage. Eventually Spencer noticed him, and tried to casually saunter past him. The conversation went something like this:

Woo: "Out for a walk?"

Spencer: "Yeah. Out for a walk."

Woo: "I'm out for a walk myself."

Riveting. But I was reminded f the old cartoons with the sheepdog and the wolf. Each day before they started their little dance of Protect the sheep/Steal the sheep, they would pass each other at the Warner Brothers timeclock to punch in. Sam Sheepdog: "Morning." Ralph Wolf: "Morning." Then they would "go to work." I hope Spencer turns out to be Sam; he invariably won.

For some reason, Spencer decided to act like his pants weren't lying on the ground, containing an important piece of paper, and he walked away. For some reason (perhaps he saw Spencer put the clue there?), Woo decided to be a good friend and toss Spencer his pants. But not the clue, which fell to his feet. Woo jumped into hyperspeed, snatching up the paper and bolting for camp. Spencer: "Hey, I think you got something there...", but Woo was off like a video game character - "Sonic the Hedgehog," per Woo's own words. This whole sequence, between Woo's strange confessionals and calling himself Sonic, had begun to take on a cartoony flavor.

But the shenanigans were only starting, once Woo reached camp. Woo dutifully reported Spencer's activities and shared the clue with his alliance. Tony: "

Spencer also returned to camp to rally his "troops". I didn't see any recriminations towards Spencer for hunting the HII alone.

"You know it's bad when Morgan, the girl you can't tell if she's a pillow or a person (I'd rest my head on those pillows), yuou know it's serious when she's up off her a$$ and looking for the idol." Tony

Woo told Kass to keep an eye n Spencer, and she did a lousy job. Justice is blind. Spencer located the HII right in front of her but began distracting her before he actually grabbed it: "Funny how our game has devolved into this." Kass: "It's karma for what you did." Really, Kass? Karma, for what they did? I'd say karma delivered that HII to Spencer for what you did.

The IC was an endurance contest wherein the Survivor must stand on their toes and wedge a block of wood against the top of the frame with their head. Kass must have quite the round head, as she lasted about .0001 milliseconds into the challenge. That, or she is purposefully throwing these challenges; it sure seems like she has been first out a lot.

The IC came down to LJ, Tasha, and Spencer, with LJ dropping out around the one-hour mark. Though Tasha seemed immovable and Spencer struggled mightily down the stretch, it was Tasha who suddenly dropped her block, giving Spencer his first individual immunity: "I've waited so long for this."

While Kass is sure the minority alliance does not have a HII, Tony would rather vote out Morgan, as they are certain no one will give a HII to her. Also, Morgan didn't deserve to be on Survivor.

After Spencer approached Kass about flipping again, Kass said: "I knew this would happen." She thought Spencer was forgiving her instead of trying to use her, I suppose. She went on to hog more airtime by proclaiming she loves the ambush and the blindside.

At TC, Probst asserted there was a big change last time. "I was the wind that blew through," Kass asserted, as always eager to aggrandize herself.

Spencer made a statement pointed Kass: "I play the game to win the game. I would rather risk going out now for a shot at winning than extend my stay in the game."

Morgan admitted she couldn't win challenges and wasn't well liked in camp. When Trish agreed with her assessment, Morgan made a face. What? You don't want people agreeing with you? Perhaps she anticipated Trish's next comments: "I can add more to the list." Trish isn't nice. Morgan just said that she was used to being taken care of. Probst asked her if it was because of her looks, and Morgan simply replied yes, shocking some of the others. But Morgan defended herself: "If any persn in the world decide to be ugly or cute, most would pick cute." Well, not the Baron Harkonnen.

Jefra tried to assert that her alliance was all equal links in a chain Oh, honey. Keep trying. Tony claimed that the other alliance had been made by the luck of the draw, while his alliance was hand-picked. Wow, Tony - delusional much?

Morgan got the boot. Bye, Morgan; we'll see the three of you at TC.

Morgan, post-boot: "I just want to say how proud I am of myself...I could care less what they said. Kass is a child and if she was upset with me...whatever. Grow up. You're 40. Get over it." I think they both have some growing up to do.

Next time on...Survivor! Paranoia, mind destroyer.

• RE: #ninjastealthmode,dabo, 00:02 AM, 04-17-14
• RE: #ninjastealthmode,kingfish, 08:27 AM, 04-17-14
  • RE: #ninjastealthmode,QuickBen, 02:11 PM, 04-20-14
    • RE: #ninjastealthmode,kingfish, 09:07 PM, 04-20-14
• RE: #ninjastealthmode,suzzee, 09:47 AM, 04-21-14

Very nicely done, Ben. It kinda feels like yesterday's news, though. I guess it takes a while to put together?

Tony is delusional, but he attempts to disguise it by waving his hands and talking non-stop.

Yeah, not the best recap, and not very timely, either. My apologies - I'll try to get them out sooner.

On that note, I won't be able to do one this week. Maybe bullet points, if I can. Was very sick from last Monday until Saturday, capable of absolutely nothing. A doctor visit Wednesday only led to an ER trip Friday, finally better today, Sunday. Haven't even been able to watch the last episode in it's entirety. Not sleeping for several consecutive days wore me out. So I'm behind at my regular desk job, and this week will be scramble mode, or #scramblemode, Survivor-style.

Lastly, the last recap had some glaring holes, points I intended to fill in and couldn't get to. Posted it anyway since it was almost air time for the next episode. Then collapsed into a ball of pain.

Survivor is my guilty pleasure. Hope to do better, and promise to try!

Get well.

We'll enjoy it whenever we get it.

Nicely done QB, great read with the morning coffee!

I love these guys, and it is exactly right, Morning Woo, morning Spencer.

Just call me Woo Hoo