LAST EDITED ON 02-16-12 AT 10:54 PM (EST)

Sorry for the delay my friends, I was too busy tweeting when I realized our fearless leader EpMB aka Mark "No Show" Burnett was off enjoying an island retreat with his lovely wife Roma and bosom buddy Richard Branson. Hope they don't get too close to the fire!

Well Fans, how'd you like the premier episode of "Survivor: One World?" I have to say, I couldn't have done a better job of creating just the right mix of tension and turmoil! Our first show had all the key elements we look for in our initial episodes, and this is magnified even further with our battle of the sexes.

Colton led us right into the name of the season with his "One World" quote. I can tell our casting director is going to get a raise with that find! I'm not sure if he's a man or a girl, maybe ... he's Pat! And Sabrina quickly caught on after much convincing by cameraman Number 2 that he should be the one to receive her hidden immunity idol. After all, we had to lead Sabrina to the HII with a trail of dropped bread crumbs. These are the "behind-the-scene" actions we have to take in order to deliver the highest quality show we can.

And the catfight between Christina and Alicia ... was purrrr-fect, don't you think? Who will come out on top you ask? Stay tuned for more drama in future episodes!

Michael aka "Ken", was also directed by EpMB, Puppet Master to go forth and remove the girls' gathered items at the beginning of the show. I tell you folks, producing Survivor: One World is not rocket science! Any moron can do it! Tell me, who will prevail? The Alpha Alliance of Michael, Matt and Jay? Or the Betas ... Leif, Bill, Colton, Greg and Jonas? Time will tell. What a cat fight at Tribal Council. Are the women really that unorganized? Stay tuned ...

• RE: "Be the Survivor": S24 Survivor One World Ep 1,Aruba, 11:09 PM, 02-16-12
  • *KICK*,foonermints, 01:15 AM, 02-17-12
    • RE: *KICK*,michel, 09:04 PM, 02-21-12
• RE: "Be the Survivor": S24 Survivor One World Ep 1,qwertypie, 07:37 PM, 02-21-12
  • RE: "Be the Survivor": S24 Survivor One World Ep 1,michel, 09:05 PM, 02-21-12
  • RE: "Be the Survivor": S24 Survivor One World Ep 1,agman, 09:05 PM, 02-21-12
• RE: "Be the Survivor": S24 Survivor One World Ep 1,michel, 08:58 PM, 02-21-12

Hey...you left me out!!!

You can't get more "Alpha" than TROYZAN. And don't even think about grouping me with Tatoo, Fancypants, Tarzan Wannabee, that whimp who couldn't keep his eyes open while guarding the fire, and...who the heck is, what's his name, Jonas???

And YES, I stand by my claim at the opening of the show...the women are "ALL TALK." Hey, I tried to do them a favor and help them with their organization when I suggested they do a Pole Dance. But they didn't listen to Jeff when he hinted Michael was stealing their stuff, and how to fall on the cargo net...so do you really think they'd listen to Troyzan???

OW! I think I broke my ankle!

Kourntey, leave that dumbass to me. He was too afraid to continue the challenge because he knows how this will finish. For now, he's the one that is all talk.

I didn't think it would be this easy for me to fly under the radar. But I swear if anyone else pats me the head s/he going DOWN!

*pat*pat*pat* You're funny!

excuse me shorty *pats leif's head

Jiffy, you have to ask who will come out on top between me and Christina? She'd be lights out on the floor before you could even say "This challenge has started."