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Original Message
"IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."

Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 01:34 PM
Looks like we're getting a full two hours of inaction in order to cover all the emergency script changes activity of the last three days. But don't worry: no more than every last second forty minutes of that will be devoted to coverage of the biggest desperate attention whores in genre history the biggest desperate attention whores on the planet. Because as we all know, NBC would like to renegotiate the contract and see if they can get their souls back is being very careful about how they write edit this show. Too much of Speidi is mandatory only going to make the audience vanish all the faster ruin the pace of this fine cheap time filler with a current charity donation pool of three bucks program. It has to be subjected to a North Korea atomic test used carefully for maximum suicide rate excitement.

Gosh, won't this be creating a new generation of genocide supporters exciting!

Why have I not been posting the no-sigpics warning? Because it's IAC and I don't care.


Table of contents

Messages in this discussion
"RE: IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."
Posted by Snidget on 06-08-09 at 01:38 PM
Well since the doctor won't let them leave, they might as well be on the show, righ

http://www.tmz.com/2009/06/08/docs-put-speidi-in-no-fly-zone/


SoYouThinkYouCanTribe!

I figured you were holding out hope that crashing the thread crashes the show.


"They're not allowed to fly?"
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 01:50 PM
Is it permanent? Because if it is, all we have to knock off is 'not allowed to travel by ocean' and 'not allowed to travel by land vehicle'. (They don't do 'walk'.)

"Inside their torture chamber per TMZ:"
Posted by HobbsofMI on 06-08-09 at 03:24 PM
Inside Speidi's Torture Chamber!!!


GO WINGS! 2008 Stanley Cup Champs!
sig JSlice and by IceCat, and bobble head by Tribephyl


"Medical miracles."
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 03:42 PM
Y'know, after three days without water, most people don't develop stomach ulcers. They just die.

"RE: Medical miracles."
Posted by Agman2 on 04-12-16 at 10:59 AM
Well, yes, yes you can

"RE: IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."
Posted by kingfish on 06-08-09 at 03:38 PM
Heidi: they tortured me, they tortured me!

NBC: uh, Heidi, you do know that we have every moment of your time in Costa Rica on tape, so we can prove that no torture occured, and that you are lying?

And rice and beans are what most Costa Rican's eat every day, so that isn't torture either?

Heidi: Ohhhh...the devil got to me again. That old Devil! We'll just have to dunk Spenser again and really wash that ole devil out this time! I'm so proud of Spenser!


"RE: IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."
Posted by Loree on 06-08-09 at 07:01 PM
Access Hollywood is saying that Heidi's sister Holly will join the show tonight.

"RE: IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 07:53 PM
So you're saying she likes being tortured?

"RE: IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."
Posted by Snidget on 06-08-09 at 07:57 PM
Won't it be hard to convince people you were tortured when your family joins the show?

At least they still have Stephanie on twitter keeping up the pretense.


"Showtime approaches."
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 07:55 PM
I wonder if NBC put an exorcist on standby?

"RE: IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."
Posted by vince3 on 06-08-09 at 08:06 PM
I like the camo-painted guards of the Lost Chamber.......

There's a lot of spiders in the Lost Chamer suite........

They actually dared to put "Pop Star" next to Sanjaya's name?


"Dear gawd....."
Posted by vince3 on 06-08-09 at 08:08 PM
If Speidi survives the sleepover, they'll let them back in camp.

"They were made to vote until they got it right."
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 08:10 PM
After much off-camera manipulation, twisting of arms, and re-reading of contracts, the cast has suddenly suffered from a change (or removal) of heart and will take Speidi back. The pre-commercial cell then shows the pair completing their Chamber Of Bunking Out terror and exiting triumphant (and healthy). As Fran notes, drama vacation is about to end.

So Spencer's lying scum. But we knew that. And the show is heavily manipulated. But we'd already figured that one out. And we're watching it. Anyone know why?


"RE: They were made to vote until they got it right."
Posted by AyaK on 06-08-09 at 08:13 PM
Because there's a sucker born every minute? And none of us were born within the same minute?

"RE: They were made to vote until they got it right."
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 08:33 PM
Well, we are being fed bonafide baloney with no truth in it.

"RE: They were made to vote until they got it right."
Posted by kingfish on 06-08-09 at 08:15 PM
I'm not getting off the conspiracy wagon, but it does make a kind of sense that the other campers would vote for their return. Especially Janice. It takes the target off of everyone else when voting time comes.

Poor Angela, a victim of bad luck/timing.


"RE: They were made to vote until they got it right."
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 08:22 PM
Note that the temp-quit cleared the Pratts of the first vote.

"Spencer's U-turn explanation."
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 08:15 PM
Heidi read him a section of the Bible and it made him throw up.

...no, I'm serious. That's what he said.


"The reason autotune was invented."
Posted by Snidget on 06-08-09 at 08:16 PM
Heidi's singing.

"RE: The reason autotune was invented."
Posted by mrc on 06-08-09 at 08:20 PM
Wow. I thought Sanjaya was a bad singer.

Someone Fooned me
When is someone gonna make Speidi siggies?


"Heidi sings."
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 08:21 PM
Wait a minute. I thought they were the one who were going to be tortured!

Yes, Janice said something unkind. (And went down on bended knee for it afterwards. I heard the gears meshing.) But if you think the cat comment was bad, imagine what Simon would have said...

...probably best not to give Heidi any ideas for her next series appearance.


"RE: Heidi sings."
Posted by kingfish on 06-08-09 at 08:32 PM
Ok! You see, all this time I just didn't get it. But now I do.

God exists to serve the Pratts.

Well, there you go!


"To bring back a Weaver line:"
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 08:32 PM
Spencer Pratt: the only Christian with the power to make his fellows convert to Wicca.

So first Spencer hears the Bible being read, and he throws up. Then Heidi speaks about serving Jesus and starts feeling sick. And then I looked at Spencer's expression when he said he and Heidi were of one flesh, and I felt ill. Anyone starting to sense a pattern?


"Frances quits"
Posted by vince3 on 06-08-09 at 08:32 PM
... and truly meant it, as she walks out of camp to go find Angela.....

"RE: Frances quits"
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 08:34 PM
Oh sure, she says that now, but give her five minutes...

"Do you think Jesus is buying this?"
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 08:38 PM
Daniel isn't.

But he also put his finger on the problem: there are people who will be ready to take out a full mortgage on this conversion, and anything Daniel says against Speidi will set every last one of them off.


"RE: Do you think Jesus is buying this?"
Posted by Snidget on 06-08-09 at 08:45 PM
Who knew Daniel was that aware?

I'm guessing Spencer is doing this because someone told him he wasn't polling well and had best manufacture some redemption right quick.


"RE: Do you think Jesus is buying this?"
Posted by mrc on 06-08-09 at 09:24 PM
I blame Danny Gokey's church.

"RE: IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."
Posted by mrc on 06-08-09 at 08:40 PM
Poor Patti. I admire her loyalty to her husband.

A SHARper Image


"RE: IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."
Posted by kingfish on 06-08-09 at 08:48 PM
Things the others should be saying/asking:

1. To Spencer: "Did you think before you said that?" (after every thing he says, just for fun).

2. To Patty: "Ok, well, how about those phone recordings, do you think a sitting Governor who gets caught making those recordings should not be investigated?" (Ok, this isn't the forum for her to be trying to exculpate him, but still, it'd be interesting to see what she would say).

3. To Patty: "And which exclusive Prep schools are you trying to keep you kids enrolled in?"

"And is it really a hardship getting your butler to drive them to school?"

"Do you think your husband bears any blame for your troubles?"


"Patti talks about the scandal's emotional fallout."
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 08:43 PM
Okay, fair enough. It's hard on the kids, she's having a rough time financially, the publicity svcks. Hard to argue with any of that. But you'd really think that if your husband is receiving bribe money for giving out power positions, he'd have the sense to put some of it away for a rainy day.

"RE: Patti talks about the scandal's emotional fallout."
Posted by kingfish on 06-08-09 at 08:48 PM
Maybe she just hasn't looked in the freezer yet.

"RE: IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."
Posted by kingfish on 06-08-09 at 08:51 PM
I'm going out on a limb here and guessing that Janice might have experience with locks and chains and handcuffs.

"Food trial."
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 08:55 PM
The hosts walk in to announce the voting results. (Heidi makes sure her dry shampoo is visible.) It's Sanjaya vs. Janice -- and the later immediately tries to quit.

We're looking at a flood tank: you're chained in with six locks, sort out the keys and padlocks, hang the open ones on a display pole, and deal with the wildlife that's entering the tank. (Baby crocs? Are cute.) Sanjaya, our challenge whore, does it in 3:12. Commercial break before Janice officially quits.


"Flash Flood"
Posted by vince3 on 06-08-09 at 08:58 PM
America voted, (Speidi was exempt, due to not being in camp when voting started......) and the celebrities they selected to participate in the Food Trial are......

Sanjaya for the men...... and Janice for the women! (wonders if Frances would've beaten her if she stayed in camp....)

Food reward of lobsters, bananas, jungle apples...


As the water rises, more creatures come in as well.... snakes/eels, crocs, frogs/toads......

Sanjaya's time..... 6 locks in 3:12

Janice's time..... She abandons the challenge when the crocs enter the tank after getting one lock on the rack.


"RE: Flash Flood"
Posted by kingfish on 06-08-09 at 09:01 PM
LAST EDITED ON 06-08-09 AT 09:02 PM (EST)

The elephant in the room, the white white white elephant.

America should vote for Stephen to put on his shirt.



"RE: Flash Flood"
Posted by kingfish on 06-08-09 at 09:04 PM
Anyone else get the feeling that Stephen and Dan have had a few arguments about Stephen's Evangelism?

"RE: Flash Flood"
Posted by kingfish on 06-08-09 at 09:46 PM
LAST EDITED ON 06-08-09 AT 09:47 PM (EST)

(Back to the shirtless Stephen theme)

So, the bugs are eating Sanjay alive (and a few others), but Stephen, that soft white main insect entree, seems to be bite-less.

God, the ultimate bug repellent.


"Give Janice a little credit."
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 09:04 PM
Until the predicted quit came true, she was playing the challenge with some brains: get all the keys elevated, get herself as far out of the water as possible. (Oddly, her keys entered the tank earlier than Sanjaya's did -- or given the rigging here, not odd at all.) But then she did what she does best -- and no one was surprised.

"RE: Give Janice a little credit."
Posted by Snidget on 06-08-09 at 09:05 PM
I will say she did seem to have a decent plan. Get the keys up and work on the feet so you don't have to go under water as much.

I think she'd have won if she hadn't freaked over the critters.


"RE: Give Janice a little credit."
Posted by kingfish on 06-08-09 at 10:30 PM
I hadn't realized till I saw her in that tank just how tiny she is.

80 lbs?


"Open warning for the next segment."
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 09:04 PM
Don't get your hopes up. We know Heidi lived.

"RE: Open warning for the next segment."
Posted by kingfish on 06-08-09 at 09:14 PM
Only Spencer/Heidi would take an "Ambulancia" for a stomach bug. Those things are so easy to get, especially for a pampered American digestive tract.

"Sanjaya was (originally) cast for the wrong series."
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 09:12 PM
Ye gawds. Anyone else starting to wonder just what kind of Survivor he would have made? I'm going to say mid-jury.

"RE: Sanjaya was (originally) cast for the wrong series."
Posted by Snidget on 06-08-09 at 09:14 PM
Yep. People like him and he's helpful in camp and the challenges.

They'd keep him right up until they get close enough to the end to start tallying up the votes.

He'd need a good challenge run right at the end (and might be able to do it) to survive the mid jury stage.


"Spencer rewrites reality."
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 09:13 PM
So to his internal math

'I went on a spiritual fast.'

=

'The producers starved us.'

Good luck with that lawsuit, Born-Again Boy.


"RE: IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."
Posted by jbug on 06-08-09 at 09:15 PM
So just what part of this is supposed to be live?

Did Frances really leave? for good?
(I missed about 45 minutes & am switching back & forth to the Bach


"RE: IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."
Posted by kingfish on 06-08-09 at 09:19 PM
Ultrasound?

OMG, she's pregnant! (channeling Max)


"RE: IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."
Posted by udg on 06-08-09 at 09:20 PM
I love how she went from "worst pain ever" "worse than a broken nose" to 4 on a scale of 1-10!

"Leadership Trial"
Posted by vince3 on 06-08-09 at 09:30 PM
Jungle Joe's all you can eat buffet.....

First two of each foursome advance to second round, winners second round advance to Finals.

Mapani worms for the foursome of Sanjaya, John, Janice, and Torrie..... Janice instant quits, Torrie quits shortly after, John tastes meat and pleads vegan on his way to the rail. Sanjaya eventually gets them down by pulverising them, although Stephen proclaims Sanjaya's milking camera time. Sanjaya's response: you try them! Stephen puts them all in his mouth and quickly eats them

Leaf cutter ants for the foursome of Patti, Daniel, Stephen, and Lou.... Stephen quits after a couple of ants , Patti quits shortly afterwards. Lou and Daniel both finish off their plate.

Sanjaya's second round: He just has to finish the next dish to advance to the final...... bull testicles!


"RE: Leadership Trial"
Posted by vince3 on 06-08-09 at 09:36 PM
Sanjaya tries to eat them, but eventually surrenders.

So it's Lou vs. Daniel for Camp Leader: Stick insect with cow tongue chaser! Daniel ate the stick insect, Lou instant quits. Daniel can't complete the cow tongue, but hopes that it was enough to do it. However, since no one completed the final challenge, there would be no new leader. Daniel then puts a vote to keep Lou as leader, then.....


"Leadership trial, in progress."
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 09:30 PM
And goodbye Girl Power.

Daniel's competitive, but an eating machine isn't every aspect of a challenge whore...

Oh, look. Testicles. As if Janice has never seen those before.


"RE: Leadership trial, in progress."
Posted by mrc on 06-08-09 at 09:34 PM
John: "You just tongued a cow."

Tribefied


"RE: IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."
Posted by kingfish on 06-08-09 at 09:31 PM
LAST EDITED ON 06-08-09 AT 09:34 PM (EST)

I'm going out on another snarky limb and guess that Janice isn't that really that unfamiliar with the taste of testicles. Animal testicles, even.

ETA: You know you're in trouble deep when you're thinking like me.


"RE: IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."
Posted by AyaK on 06-08-09 at 11:59 PM
No, you're not. Remember, we're talking about a woman who bragged about being stuck more times than a pincushion during her Studio 54 days.

I'm not sure where she ranks on the all-time list of superMODELS, but she's way up there on the all-time list of super------.


"RE: IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."
Posted by mrc on 06-08-09 at 09:36 PM
This episode feels longer than American Idol results show.

"RE: IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 09:43 PM
But is it longer than an Apprentice finale?

"They're celebrities -- "
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 09:40 PM
-- get them all out of here!

"RE: They're celebrities -- "
Posted by kingfish on 06-08-09 at 09:44 PM
I think Janice has Aids.


"No, they're not --"
Posted by udg on 06-08-09 at 09:48 PM
but you can get them all out of here anyway!

"RE: IAC #2 Episode #5 East Coast Spoile rThread."
Posted by mrc on 06-08-09 at 09:49 PM
Wanna bet that Speidi come back before the end of the season?

"The BB editing primer."
Posted by Estee on 06-08-09 at 09:56 PM
Twenty broadcast seconds of an endurance challenge equals 'live show'.

"Janice has a doctor note?"
Posted by Snidget on 06-08-09 at 09:56 PM
or just another excuse not to do a challenge?

"RE: Janice has a doctor note?"
Posted by jbug on 06-08-09 at 10:09 PM
The only one she has even attempted to start is the flood one - and only because she was voted to do it.
She's coped out of every one.
If I voted on these things, she'd be the one I'd vote to send home.