Nutz honey, you will not have had to watch last week's show. There will be a 56 min 32 sec recarp before the new Apprentice is crowned. You know the rules!

Deal or no deal is ninety minutes tonight, and they said at the start of the show that the contestant they began with is the last of the year. Or in other words, they're gonna stretch twenty-six cases into an hour and a half. Welcome to NBC Filler Monday.

At least it's good practice for Donald.

First, Howie had the contestant do her excruciating Celine Dion impression. Then he had her do an even more excruciating Celine Dion impression. And then someone off-camera did one that was beyond excruciating, American Idol 'did anyone else feel the wax run out of their ears? Oh, wait. That's blood' level. And it turned out to be Celine Dion.

Make that NBC No Viewer Left Alive Monday.

And Celine knocks the $2,500,000 off the board. (5 brak brak brak top prize tonight.) Gee, if she advises our contestant to make a bad decision, will she personally make up the prize money difference?

We're revisiting a past contestant to watch him cash his check. And we're cutting to commercial. Because we have ninety minutes to fill, and two minutes of action to fill them with. Why doesn't someone just lob a tear gas grenade into the Banker's suite and get it over with?

This time, the contestant picks the case, but Celine gives the opening order, and what happens? Goodbye, million. Oh, yeah, this is the celebrity lucky charm for the ages. 'And now sitting in your family section, the former CEO of Enron!'

I am LOLing! Celine just mucked up everything.

We've got eight cases and forty minutes left. Did I say Howie was going to stretch things out? Now hosting: Plastic Man.

Y'know, statistically, the show should produce one jackpot in every twenty-six contestants -- or at least, one player in 26 should pick the top case, even if they don't go all the way with it. We've had more than that number of players, but no one's found the high case yet.

Multi-millionaire singer advises contestant to get out early. Contestant leaves with $196,000. Case contained $750,000.

And now on to the second half of our evening, 'Never listen to Donald.'

Well, I must admit I've been very 'meh' about this season, but of course I'm here for the finale. I'm rooting for Sean, but will try to keep my commentary impartial.

I guess I am rooting for Sean. I am just put out with this whole thing and will be thankful for it to be over.

Does anyone think Donald will turn to the winner and ask if he wants the runner-up to be hired this year?

I don't think so, but it will be funny if the following conversation takes place before Trump announces his decision.

Trump: Lee, do you think I should be hire Sean to be my Apprentice?

Lee: No Mr. Trump (before Lee gets the chance to elaborate on his answer, Donald cuts him off).

Trump: Sean, do you think I should hire Lee to be my Apprentice?

Sean: No Mr. Trump (before Sean gets the chance to elaborate on his answer, Donald cuts him off).

Trump: A great leader always listen to the advice of others. I respect your opinion, and neither of you are hired. Lee, Sean, you are both fired.

Yep, it's like the uncontrollable compulsion to slow down as we drive past a highway accident.

Although, Lee's team looked so unorganized and unfocused during the first part of the final task, certainly appeared to be classic EPMB misdirection.

Does anybody really know? Does anybody really care?

I didn't like Lee's edit at all. Lee made it sound like he thought being in charge of the project was only ONE thing. I have news for Lee...a PM is in charge of every aspect of that ONE thing.

Estee, I think D has learned his lesson...I think.

Where's he been hiding?

The opening just gets bigger and gaudier every year. Bleh.

'In every way, this season has been a success... I couldn't have asked for two stronger candidates than Sean and Lee...'

*gag*
*choke*
*spit*

...I just couldn't swallow it all...

so, are you saying you spit?

*runs and hides*

Are you saying that when it comes to Donald, you swallowed?

LAST EDITED ON 06-05-06 AT 09:36 PM (EST)

I just threw up.

I could transcribe it for you, but suffice to say we're seeing all the *best* of Sean and Lee, with none of the missteps.

What happened to the High Holy Days? And is leaving that out a positive or negative edit for Lee?

Only took him 8 minutes to bring us up to date. Of course, he still has 82 minutes to fill. *yawn*

Sean's team is a man down, discussing what could be the matter with Andrea. the doc at the Urgent Care Center tells Andrea it's nothing drastic, just an irritation of the mucus linings. Andrea returns as Tammy is going over the tasks Andrea left for them.

Lys arrives for the walk through with Lee's team. She doesn't see a good timeline, wants a scripted half time, wants them to explain the 'shirt off their back' auction. Lenny, as usual, is having difficulty expressing himself. Lys does not appear to have great confidence in Lee's leadership.

Sean meets with Mark Hahn, takes him to the stage and unfortunately mentions they plan to have leader of 'Bare Naked Ladies' in a panda suit, which is the logo of the charity. Nope, not a good idea.

Realizing that she has every right to be concerned and I wouldn't want my charity in Lee's hands either, but Lys is basically inspiring me not to donate anything to any organization she's in charge of, ever. There's constructive criticism and there's berating people until you hear the wrong decision, then not bothering to tell them they made one.

Yep, gotta say she's not the best national representative for Dennis' foundation.

Sean greets Bare Naked Ladies. Tarek working with SLS Technology, one of the sponsors. Tarek and George concerned that Sean not spending enough time with the team.

Lee overseeing his team. Pepi in charge of signage. Roxanne in charge of, sorry, missed it. Lenny in charge of greeting players. Lee meeting with Kristy, who does not seem impressed with their plans for introducing players and celebrities. Lee and Lenny are making assumptions with no plan to back it up. Roxanne deems the meeting a 'disaster'.

Lenny and Pepi are in Locker Room and plan to 'guess' on sizes for the players, because they don't have sizes for everyone. They decidei to go with 'medium' for everyone. (Even DH said they should go with L for everyone, better too big than too small. Stoopid, stoopid people.)

You're a medium -- or you will wear a medium. Either way, the mediums get used.

*peeks in thread*
*points & laughs* @ the viewers who are actually watching because they had forgotten the pain, torture and general *yawn*fest of the last 3 horrible, senseless, stupid, Donald DAWfest season finales.

*laughs and points at nutz*

Cuz...I am watching something else and flipping back and forth. It holds my interest better. This one hasn't been as boring as others (IMHO).

We're watching so you don't have to. (I get no respect, I tell you, no respect.)

I bet some peeps thank you bunches for your sacrifice.

LAST EDITED ON 06-05-06 AT 09:56 PM (EST)

*giggle* Hi Vols!

I'm just sitting here at the computer watching nothing. I don't even care.

ETA: ...and in a few minutes, I'm going to bed. Yeppers, I'll likely be snoring before it's over.

Synergy cannot find the audio for the VIP pre-party so SLS can showcase their speakers. Tammy returns to the war room and Sean finally finds the correct CD. Sean is pumped!

Back at Chelsea Pier, Jason Priestly checks in. No one from the team is there to greet him, Lenny is supposed to greet the celebrities. Lenny isn't answering his phone, so Lee recruits another volunteer to greet the players and take them to the Locker Room. Lee is sounding more unhappy with Lenny.

Lee and Lenny greet Jamie Pressley. Jamie asks Lee to have everything written out for her. Montage of the celebrity players getting ready, Lenny walks Jamie into dressing room to meet everyone. Dennis questions Lenny about the sizes of the jerseys, mentions they look small.

Jamie standing in the hallway, 'what am I supposed to do now? anyone?'. Carolyn tells us she doesn't know why Lee chose Lenny or Pepi, Lenny doesn't make any client or sponsor comfortable, Pepi was fired the second week.

to bring out the other losers previous candidates.

Lee advising Pepi to push the Silent Auction items at the VIP party. Trump calls Lee to check status, Lee tells The Donald he is scheduled to be on ice at 5pm, Donald tells him to makes sure things start on time as he must leave.

Donald arrives, Lee is not there to meet him, Lee is dashing up the stairs and meets him as he arrives at the stands. Lee, ever the svck up, have a reserved seat and Diet Coke for Donald.

The players are introduced to applause. I can't just be me, the stands are more than half empty!

Synergy's VIP party begins. There is no Pontiac signage, George reassures them they won't need much, the cars will sell themselves. Andrea leads VIP guests into party, tells them about the cars and doles out champagne, however she is dressed in jeans and a tee-shirt (ouch!). Sean stops by the hotel salon to fix his hair!

Lee introduces Jamie Pressley to auction off the automobiles. Lenny doesn't have her prepared, she tells him he needs to get his act together. Lee is running around spotting the bids. The car sells for $27,000? WTF? A car that isn't even on the market yet? The Donald departs and tells Lee he is going to see how his competitors are doing on their task.

The Donald calls to tell Sean he is on his way, and Lee's hockey game went very well. Tarek introduces the representatives from SLS Technology. Sean greets Donald as his helicopter arrives. The Pontiac rep complains to Andrea that there is no Pontiac signage anywhere in the event. He isn't pleased but will wait to see how the auction goes. Their Pontiac goes for $40,000.

At the end of the auction a very big 'thank you Pontiac' is on the overhead screens. Hopefully that will appease the executive. Donald drives a car onto the stage and greets the audience, thanks the Trump Taj Mahal staff. Sean introduces the band, Trump disappointed they weren't real 'bare naked ladies'. (Guess he should have stopped at Scores first, huh?)

Lee thanking his crew at the Chelsea Pier as they head out at the end of the evening. Lee's sure there is no way Sean's team performed that well for him.

Looks like everyone is having a great time at the BNL concert, Donald says goodbye to Sean, tells Sean he doesn't need to walk him out, good job. Sean feels he surrounded himself with good people, Andrea, Tarek and Tammy did a great job.

At this point, you sort of have to wonder if Sean and Lee even care about who wins.

At this point? Does anyone really care?

Trump Lesson of the Week: Take Credit. Blow your own horn before someone else has an opportunity to do so.

Comments from the final two candidates on why they should be chosen the apprentice. Sean feels he has more experience, Lee feels he is the true definition of an apprentice.

DT asks Sean how he chose his team and why. Based on balance of operations, sales, marketing, event planning as well as a group that could get along together. He feels much of task was won based on selection process, confident that the passion his team possessed was better than the team Lee chose.

DT shares with Lee he picked riskier team, Lenny risky, Roxanne just a good lawyer, Pepi noboby remembers. Lee wanted people who were passionate about him winning. Carolyn wanted to know why Pepi would be passionate.

DT wants to know why Sean better than Lee, he has nine years of international experience over Lee. Lee ready to hit the ground running. (It's funny, you can hear the audience cheering in the background.) Sean and Lee going back and forth with their various impressive credentials to impress DT.

The music swells as DT tells them they are both impressive and dismisses them from the boardroom.

DT is live from the theater in Hollywood. DT takes a moment to introduce his Apprenti, Donald and Ivanka. Don likes them both. Ivanka could imagine working with either of them.

DT introduces Randal (there is only one Apprentice) Pinkett. He's having a great time managing the renovation and all the details are on Randal's website.

DT introduces the final two candidates. Lee is first, he comes through the doors with his arms in the air like Ali. Sean is introduced, and he comes through the door also pumping his arms in their air. Is this a guy thing? Both candidates greet the fired candidates. Tarek, has the utmost respect for Sean, would be a wonderful addition to DT's organization. Tammy, does she think Sean was hurt in DT's eyes for his declaration of his affection? She tells DT it shows how much passion he has for things and he would bring that passion to the Trump Organization. DT says that's a great answer.

DT greets Lenny and Pepi, gives Pepi his props. Asks Lenny why Lee seemed to use Lenny as a crutch, Lenny says something to the effect Lee is like gold, only appreciates in price, wants DT to invest in gold. Charmaine thinks they are both fantastic, Sean has leadership and organizational skills to help organization.

Now the job choices -- new hotel being built in Hawaii, or a condominium hotel in Soho in NYC. Sean would love the NY job, Lee chooses the same.

DT asks the fired to stand if they want Sean. It's pretty much split 50-50. George thinks they have two great candidates, would happy with either one. Carolyn thinks they are both great, compliments both candidates, tells Sean he is a true leader.

DT asks usualy 'why should I hire you' question. Lee goes first and pleads his case as the lights in the theater are darkened and music swells in background. Sean is second and is quite articulate. Donald asks Sean straight up if he plans to marry Tammy, Sean admits they are dating and yes he plans to marry her.

Donald asks for viewer votes, tells us it is very lopsided and he agrees with the vote but thinks they are both very talented, would like to hire them both but that's not the way it works.

Lee, you're fired, Sean, you're hired.

...and after giving Sean a few moments to celebrate and greet the other candidates, DT sends him downstairs to his new car. The fired candidates stand around and wonder what they're supposed to do now. Did Sean even have a chance to say hello to his parents? He did hug Tammy and swing her around.

Bill Rancic sighting!

Some guy standing at the front of the stage urging the audience to cheer.

The fired candidates line up to shake DT's hand and thank him for the opportunity.

Overblown four minutes of horn music and audience shots, and Andrea shows up for her last appearance on national television in jeans and what appears to be a green cordoury jacket with some kind of embroidery. (ouch! double ouch!)

LAST EDITED ON 06-06-06 AT 09:19 PM (EST)

okay first of all let me preface myself by stating I didnot think Randall should have won last year, he should have been eliminated when he messed up the date for the event they were planning with the radio station....anyway I found it 'interesting' unlike previous years that he did not get to speak on his project instead he referred to his website..I wonder if there is stuff we ouight to know...

anyway Tammy should get an Academy Award for her role as princess while being an Ice Maiden....When his other member walked in the room from the doctors I deliberately looked at Tammy for her reaction..she is quite incapable of responding with any genuine and sincere empathy...I agreed with another poster in that she does not have the same affections for Sean as he does for her..but hey he will fix that with a diamond or two...she is an opportunist and a fake....

Lee Lee Lee even at the end of his pullimg most of the team he still could not say anything bad about his team....Lenny let him down on a few items. I thought Lee spoke brilliantly when he said look where he is and Sean is ten years older and they are competing......great point not missed on the Trump....

Now not prone to fits of drama... when Trump motioned for Lee to come over at end of the show I did see him mouth to Lee to call him next week and he said thank you....I am sure I read that...I read lips.....

anyway Trump is in the bidness of bidness so Sean was the choice as he already makes million dollar deals......Lee is up and coming and at 22 my hat off to him....

OK, I know you guys are all snoozing now and may never revisit this season again, but,

PLEASE can someone explain WTF happened that no one critiqued the final task after it was done. Every other season the good and bad of the last task is brought out and the execs and sponsors usually comment ... and Donald berates whoever failed to kiss his ass

I mean really, what was the point of having the tasks at all?
Instead we get the great Andrea nosebleed non-specific diagnosis?

btw I totally had a crush on Sean from early on in the season so I'm happy he won. Tammy does seem fake. I also caught that Donald talked to Lee at the end, thanks for the lip read!
The Randall appearance was odd ... indeed. Not odd that he appeared. Randall behaved oddly by citing a website.

As a Hawaii poster, I was sorry they dissed Hawaii but Trump pretty much advised them he had a preference which would obviously be that they stay and suck up to the Donald.

Probably he did that because the job in Hawaii will be farther away and is better done by someone who is not an Apprentice.
Trump in Hawaii ... blech.