LAST EDITED ON 03-22-07 AT 00:08 AM (EST)

Lisi Lisi Bo Bisi Banana Fana Fo Fisi...

Yowza Yowza, weird episode, at least it had a few amusing moments and a horrible challenge. And then there was Lisi going all Soozin.

Two Lipgloss Awards for dangdumbest thing said this time but one of them has to go to Lisi... well, okay, it doesn't have I just can't imagine how it won't.

Standard two contestant and one production gufu votes this time, but while we're at it let's all take time to congratulate NuRotUlong for ousting the only "fem" among them because goshall isn't that all-manlymen plan just working out so doggone well.

ARRRRRRR!!!!
oops, this is week 6, blasted skipweek ...

• RE: S14 Gufu Award: Week 5,Colonel Zoidberg, 07:16 AM, 03-22-07
  • RE: S14 Gufu Award: Week 5,jackandjill, 10:07 AM, 03-22-07
    • RE: S14 Gufu Award: Week 5,Colonel Zoidberg, 10:58 AM, 03-22-07
• RE: S14 Gufu Award: Week 5,Dakota, 11:27 AM, 03-22-07

Hmmm...I'll start with the Lipgloss Awards.

Lisi for her "Yeah, I'm ready to go home" speech. And I guarantee that, next time Ravu loses a challenge, they'll be happy to oblige. Even Rocky couldn't say enough dumb stuff to make keeping Lisi seem all that unpleasant...

...wait, I take that back, he probably could. Rocky goes all Judd on Anthony at Tribal. If Anthony had been a little more fearsome before that, he might have stuck around, but by Tribal, the tribe pretty much had its mind made up. Rocky definitely made himself the next boot, Lisi notwithstanding, though I'll give the Rock-man a few bonus points for not shouting anything about "Aaaaayyyy-Deeeeee-Deeeeee."

Next up, the dangdumbest of the Contestant Gufus.

First up, Anthony. Survivor is a social game. You may not be that great in challenges, but don't make yourself isolated, dip wad. You managed to stick around in Week 3 because Sylvia was more annoying. You managed to stay in Week 4 because Moto had a poop-for-brains moment. Then Week 5 comes and you stay because Rita can't stop talking about lip gloss. Now Week 6 comes and Rocky's about to do what Sylvia and Rita previously did...and you blow it by not being more outgoing. It doesn't matter how useful you are. Just ask Tina from Exile Island.

Also, Lisi. Take one look at the Exile clues and say, "Whatever." This could qualify as a Lipgloss award; it doesn't really matter. But come on. At least TRY to figure out the damn idol clues; who knows, they may come in handy...UNLESS you really DO want out of the game and are trying to sabotage your own game on purpose. You know, most people just go up to their tribemates and say, "Vote me out, damnit." Some are even bold enough to say, "Fvck it; I quit." Some are even out there enough to say, "I was VIOLATED, HUMILIATED, and I'm TOTALLY SPENT, JEFF! And I'm DONE WITH THIS F------ GAME!" This passive-agressiveness is not becoming of a Survivor. (Though, to be fair, Sandra was passive-aggressive and she won the damn game.)

Now for Production:

I only got a quick look at the idol clue for this week, but if that isn't the most useless POS clue ever, I don't know what is. Shut the hell up with this damn rhyming business (sorry for the excessive use of the word "damn" in this post; I think that, by invoking Judd, I channeled him) and actually give clues that are worth a...ahem...damn.

but how great was it that Jiffy-Pop called her out on her stupid comments?

but how great was it that Jiffy-Pop called her out on her stupid comments?

High-falutin-larious. Lisi deserved that smackdown, and frankly, it's about time Jiffy had a little fun with that. He's put up with painfully stupid people for 14 seasons; he deserves to have some fun, and it's about time we got to see that side of him.

I'm just amazed that this drew more of a smackdown from Jiffy than Billy's comments, though...

I'm giving Rocky the Shane Award this week for being an All GUFU All the Time Survivor.

1. Rocky for comments about being on the burly manly team, although he likes women, he just doesn't need them right now.

2. Rocky for sitting in camp sitting on a rock melting down because Anthony was workin' his tribemates trying to save himself.

Lipgloss Awards:
1. Lisi for telling both tribes she wants to go home. I do hope they grant you your wish next week. I don't like you. I don't like you so much that I included you in my Rocky gets the Shane Award post.

2. Rocky for his rant at Tribal Council. Anthony is so unassertive that he doesn't offend and you can't seem to stop yourself from getting so worked up about it that you have two, not one but TWO, meltdowns in one episode. Rocky, social skills are NOT your forte and you seem to confuse manliness with jackassiness. (Can't wait to see if that gets ####'d.)

Production: For giving Stacy the week off. Now when I go back to re-watch this episode, there might be a few glimpses of her, maybe a word or two that I don't remember because I was enthralled by Rocky's machismo, but I think she got a 3-day pass.