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"AI 11 Top 9 Performance Show ECST"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 06:41 PM
So the pre-show threat down seems to indicate.

1. The theme is they will sing songs from their idols.
2. They will sing in trios as well as solos.
3. The mentor will be Stevie Nicks.

I will be rolling in about 8:30 so try to survive this as best you can until I can take over the hosting.

Table of contents
Messages in this discussion
"RE: AI 11 Top 9 Performance Show ECST"
Posted by agman on 03-28-12 at 06:47 PM
I do not know English very well, sorry for the mistakes.


"RE: AI 11 Top 9 Performance Show ECST"
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 07:07 PM
Between this and the three-hour Apprentice scheduled for Sunday, we can now officially designate this as Open Torture Week.
"RE: AI 11 Top 9 Performance Show ECST"
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 08:06 PM
You are not prepared.

@#$% that. I am not prepared.

I'm not even supposed to be here tonight!

Y'know something? The Worsters are right. Let's break this thing and shove the pieces --

-- I may not be in the right mood to tolerate this carp. But since this generally hasn't stopped me before, let's get to the opening credits and let the svckage begin. Because, y'know, as long as we're going down, let's take Steven's theoretical taste in musical performance with us.

Scenes of childhood and auditions. The landslide goat bleats brought them down.

Steven in black tonight. He's in mourning for his influence. Either Heejun went or he did, and both of them are still here. So obviously that means Steven must go. As soon as the checks stop coming.

The stage is disturbingly gold. Most of the contestants have gone in black or white with very few highlights or other shades. Because Wardrobe is afraid to try anything else. And Wardrobe is Tommy. Who may not be aware of any other colors.

Tommy claims the contestants found their own image this week. Which is kind of like giving a kid a set of twelve tiles with bits of clothing embossed on them and letting them pretend to be a fashion designer, only with a lot more money involved and even less variety of body types.

And we begin. Why?

"RE: AI 11 Top 9 Performance Show ECST"
Posted by Maroonclown on 03-28-12 at 08:22 PM
Estee, Landslide is one of my favourites from Stevie and I always love me some Stevie, even if peeps think she bleats like a goat. She's the best sounding goat I've ever heard
"RE: AI 11 Top 9 Performance Show ECST"
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 08:25 PM
I was really thinking of the contestants there. I even flashed back to no-beard Casey and his Bleat Beat. There's always one who sounds like their next move is the tin can chew. This year, there may be about six.

"Death slot: Colton"
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 08:13 PM
Doing Everything, Lighthouse. Because he has faith. For starters, he has faith in the script.

Starting off very slowly. James' red ear disease has moved to Colton's hair. Violinists in the background. Very talented violinists, outshining Colton and his glowing hair, both of which are doing more of a 'speaking sort of on rhythm' thing than singing. I listen to the violins and think of Tyler Clementi.

There are now fabric banners hanging from the ceiling. I don't know why. None of them are concealing Colton, so there goes their only purpose in life.

I keep waiting for him to ask for money.

Steven tells Colton he's a dream come true and sings a song like it should be sung, which is apparently 'not at all'. But Steven will praise anyone tonight as long as they're not Heejun. And given that kind of sincerity anti-launch, do we really need to pay any attention to what the other two say?

Yes. Randy just brought up Colton's earlier auditions. And then he talks about 'believability'. We are supposed to believe the show did not steal this script from Simon. The script does not exist. Neither does Simon. And when it comes to believability, nor does Randy.

Vote for Colton. Because he has faith. You have to believe that. Or else.

"RE: Death slot: Colton"
Posted by Maroonclown on 03-28-12 at 08:19 PM
Colton is BOR.ING
"RE: Death slot: Colton"
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 08:25 PM
I think he's trying to turn himself into Tim Tebow with an even more limited skill set and worse hair.
"RE: Death slot: Colton"
Posted by Maroonclown on 03-28-12 at 08:28 PM
Football. Does not compute.

"RE: Death slot: Colton"
Posted by catsnotkids on 03-29-12 at 09:12 AM
That's what I thought. No clue why they loved it so much. Totally boring, not good at all.
"Skylar."
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 08:23 PM
So with the svck-up to the heartland complete -- 'Don't be afraid of my skunk hair! I'm one of you! Wait, I'll prove it by taking out one of the non-Caucasians!' -- we move on to Skylar.

(By the way, Colton was worshiping a false Idol. Just saying.)

Taking on Miranda Lambert. Coming down the stairs between graphics of newspaper headlines. Tommy cannot get his fashion eyes off her hips to save what used to be his life. Skylar cannot get any energy into this song to save hers. This is coming across as something that should be the country equivalent of a pure belter and she's just barely managing suspenders. Sing something by the spouse of a competing panelist? The sound system will take you down! Or maybe that's just her voice...

Overall, competent -- but lacking in necessary power and without the total emotional commitment she needed to sell this. So naturally Jennifer's buying. Jennifer will buy anything that comes along because she only has two shows right now and her wardrobe requires a minimum of five.

Randy is saying something about telling a story. Gosh, maybe he'll talk about editing too.

"RE: AI 11 Top 9 Performance Show ECST"
Posted by Maroonclown on 03-28-12 at 08:31 PM
I WORSHIP FLEETWOOD MAC!!!! Well, maybe not worship. Wine talkin'. But gods be judges, I love Fleetwood Mac and my girl Stevie.
"Filler: trio."
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 08:32 PM
Is Snidget back yet?

The show is back. Why can't the show not get in until 8:30?

Colton, Elise, Phillip. Singing Landslide to start off a Fleetwood Mac medley.

Swaybots!

More Swaybots!

Can't find the singers for the Swaybots!

They're getting older too. But not as old as this show has gotten. And nowhere near as old as the target audience demographic, which is edging towards deceased.

Sings a song, says I can't sing it, too, baby, too, too...

Don't stop thinking about tomorrow! Because that's when one of these delusional brainwash victims is going home!

Top of the line songs, says Steven! Nailed them, says Steven! I am so stoned I don't even know where I am, implies Steven! Loudly!

Next up...

"RE: Filler: trio."
Posted by zazzy on 03-29-12 at 09:22 AM
This was the best of the trios. No wonder Elise was smiling--she had gotten to duet with Stevie earlier this week!
"Heejun."
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 08:39 PM
Forgive him, America! So plead Jimmy and Stevie. He won't try to be funny! He won't try to be energetic! He won't try to be anything you'd think about voting for! Steven has an out clause in his contract and it has to be paid in cocaine!

And then Heejun becomes the first performer of the season to take the stage while stoned out of his mind on downers. At least, the first amateur.

I don't know this song. (It is a ballad. It is generic. It is slow. It would knock Pia out all over again. )I barely recognize the singer. He has no energy. He has no personality. He has falling leaves in the background and they're displaying more movement than he is. He has been turned into a generic IdolClone. All individuality has been removed, very possibly at gunpoint.

Steven loves him now. Or loves that Heejun will now never sell a download for the rest of his career.

And -- Jennifer backlashes? Just a little, sure, and Randy immediately tries to sweep out her legs -- but Jennifer is solidly implying she wants the old Take The Urine Out Of Everything Heejun back. I wonder if we have Worsters in mourning right now. I wonder if Jennifer has turned into one of them.

If he'd declared Weird Al as his personal idol and gone for Amish Paradise, I might have voted for hours...

"RE: Heejun."
Posted by zazzy on 03-29-12 at 09:18 AM
Yes, Steve said nice things to Heyjun, but his expression AFTER his comments told the real story. When Jlo was talking, Steve looked like he was choking on what he had just said or something. Very unhappy with himself/what it takes to earn the AI paycheck.
"RE: Heejun."
Posted by agman on 03-29-12 at 03:44 PM
Heejun just sucks and that is all.


"Runs into thresd"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 08:40 PM
I'm Ba--ack.
"RE: Runs into thresd"
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 08:55 PM
Thank the gawds. I'll try to hang around for the rest of the episode, but this is turning into the kind of exercise in forced pain endurance which usually gets billed by the hour and has a safeword.

Someone please tell me what the safeword is.

"Coca Cola--Perfect Harmony"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 08:44 PM
Help Jason Derulo write a song, and he broke his neck, blinged out neck brace.

Song called undefeated. Fans get to help him finish the song, and to be performed at the finale.

"Hollie Cavanagh"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 08:45 PM
Jesus Take the Wheel--Carrie Underwood.

Stevie wants to hear her heart come out of her. Stevie got emotional, and she saw that emotion can make a difference.

"RE: Hollie Cavanagh"
Posted by Maroonclown on 03-28-12 at 08:48 PM
First Carrie sings "Maybe he'll think twice before he eats cheese" and now it's "Cheeese Takes the Wheel"
"RE: Hollie Cavanagh"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 08:50 PM
What is that pop, like a finger snap, kind of annoying. Wow, they areally are filming so all you see is swaybots, who cares who is singing, there are hands to fill up the screen with.

Fog machine is working overtime as well. So emotion is gesticulating forcefully with the hand not on the microphone, good to know.

R. Didn't know you were a Carrie Fan. Dangerous taking on idol winner songs, did a good job of it, couple of pitchy moments in the lower range. To help her grow. Can correct it later, afraid of you singing that, Carrie sang the you know what out of it. I'm impressed.

J. Disagree with Randy. That was one of your best, I've heard her sing the big notes, matters about your heart, I felt it emotionally, one of your best.

S. Between both of you. Not mess with Jesus or Carrie. Wish you sang a different song. It was just OK for me. Picked up on the passion, didn't hear the full range of your voice.

"RE: Hollie Cavanagh"
Posted by zazzy on 03-29-12 at 09:28 AM
Hollie sang that better than anything Lauren Alaina sang all last year and she, we know, took second place.

I did get the feeling the judges were trying to "Pia" her somewhat. What, Randy? Only Skylar can sing a country song? Hollie not fitting into the "lane" you had earmarked for her? Or is it that AI has deemed there are too many diva singers stil, with Jessica, Joshua and Hollie all diva song capable?

"Hollie."
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 08:52 PM
Just checked in with VFTW. They are unhappy. They're showing an odd combination of bored and pissed. They wanted Heejun to bring the mockery and instead, he brought the Sominex. They do not feel like voting for a pod person. Some discussion of switching the pick, as he has not tried to keep their luv. Poor Worsters.

No, seriously. They kind of have a point.

Hollie is going with Jesus take the wheel, which I am trying not to translate as Window Take The Remote. Stevie wants Hollie to sing this as if her mother just died, like Stevie's did. Can you name three mentors who would have killed Hollie's mother to get the right effect? (Note that Nigel doesn't count. Totally would have done it, but still doesn't count.)

Fingers, take the earplugs...

Once again, Hear the legends of the kung-fu pander!

Well, her mother's not going to die from embarrassment, but pride isn't getting within a state of fatal either. Trying to make up for skill and emotion with volume. Apparently she's picturing the pain and agony of Stevie's song view by imagining someone kicking her in the shin on every other note. No, every other note.

Randy says something vaguely constructive and semi-critical. The audience boos. The audience is trying to use Skinner training tactics, even though there might be three people in it who believe they know what I just meant and two of them are thinking about Dexter. Claim any contestant is less than perfect and hear our wrath! No one should go home in any week! Because they're all that perfect! And the audience is drugged!

It's not as if you can sway like that when you're sober.

If you want to vote for Hollie, Jesus will strike you down. Colton's Jesus. There can be no other. You will know him by his glowing hair. And the fact that he's striking you down.

Right now, 'entertainingly bad' is turning into the goal of the night.

"DeAndre Brackensick"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 08:57 PM
Stevie's old perm.

Sometimes I Cry, Stevie wants him to slow it down.
The Camera is a person. Connecting with people by connecting with electronics.

Great, make him eye-eff us. Do.Not.Want.

"RE: DeAndre Brackensick"
Posted by Maroonclown on 03-28-12 at 08:58 PM
THUD

"RE: DeAndre Brackensick"
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 09:04 PM
You can't question taste.

Until now.

"RE: DeAndre Brackensick"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 09:01 PM
Fog and Falsetto and spinning cameras

Oh, and apparently the rented the spotlights for the season, so they are back.

Someone must know the safeword. Bueller?

S. 100% Passion, what your voice was meant to do. Didn't quite put it in that perspective, gave prince a run for his money.

J. Special voice, pick up your phones and vote (maybe she is a worster) some of the things you did went to the heart, crazy.

R. Every flavor under the rainbow. Throwback, R&B, happy to see you come back to that, and what you should do. Heejun is back in the house and so is Deandre

"RE: DeAndre Brackensick"
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 09:08 PM
In four words: Worsters, switch the pick. It wasn't entertaining, but migawd, it was bad. (Will I get censored if I take their word and call that falshitto? Let's find out!)

If the Worsters can be bothered. And I quote one of their site administrators, thefunnystone: "I'll be honest - I'm ready to check out. I'm not sure if I can keep my TV on the rest of the night. This is not watchable."

Think about what was just said and who said it.

Ouch.

Randy's rainbow does not have any room for singing. Or that kind of honesty.

I want to strangle DeAndre by stuffing his hair down his throat. But it might improve his singing. Couldn't hurt.

"Michael Jackson Medley"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 09:18 PM
LAST EDITED ON 03-28-12 AT 09:19 PM (EST)

wrong place

"RE: Michael Jackson Medley"
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 09:20 PM
And as the Worsters noted, the contestants graduated from the Leroy Bell School Of Lipsynching.

Jennifer just called this perfect. What is the going rate on integrity?

"Jessica Sanchez"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 09:07 PM
Bring your parents to work day, Doing Beyonce.

Sweet Dreams, slowed down into a ballad. Going to take Stevie's suggestion.

"RE: Jessica Sanchez"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 09:12 PM
Red doors behind her, harp for accompianment.

Doors, I really want to see Twitch dancing with one. Anything to distract from the dirgifying of yet another song on a "talent" show.

Can we make them stop, please. We do not need every song turned into a dirge, really. We aren't that depressed.

She went behind a door, can she stay there, nope she comes back out. I think getting the advice from behind a door would be amusing.

J. Beyonce will say I gotta do that. Beautiful job. Where you would sing on forever but you didn't, left me wanting more.

S. Great performance, beautiful dress, you are a star no matter what. You did it again tonight, held it back, you know your notes. Pushes you guys to your limits. Got some more great in you, delicious.

R. Stars are truly born, the maturity you have, where do you learn that, I look forward to hearing you every night. I love the resolve you used not to go there with the big notes every week. Beautiful story, Colton threw down the gauntlet, she wants it too.

"Record-breaker."
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 09:16 PM
That was Randy's all-time lies-per-minute spiel, starting from his own comment about the dress -- thank you to whatever designer added the tail because the laughter may have been the only thing keeping people alive -- and running on through everything else he said. We just went past polishing crap and landed on drinking acid. Do. Not. Want.

She is going to be Pia'ed. And she will deserve it.

"RE: Record-breaker."
Posted by zazzy on 03-29-12 at 09:30 AM
Hmmm, I thought they were offering Hollie up for the Pia sacrifice, but now that you suggest Jessica, it could be so they can use the save this week. Hmmm.
"MJ Medley"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 09:19 PM
DeAndre, Heejun, Joshua.

Good thing MJ is already dead, because this would kill him.

Could they not find a hat that fit Joshua, I mean it almost looks like that one Living Color Skit.

"RE: MJ Medley"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 09:20 PM
J. A for effort, good thing this isn't SYTYCD.
"Phillip Phillips"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 09:22 PM
Johnny Lang--Still Raining.

Stevie says they would have wanted him in Fleetwood Mac. Oh.My.Heck.

She thinks he is gorgeous, what? Stevie, don't do this to me.

"RE: Phillip Phillips"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 09:26 PM
You know that much electrical sparking when it is raining should be enough to kill someone, anyone.

Standing O from the judges. Do.Not.Want.

J. Too much. Standing up too much. When you sing that you want the music to come first, I feel that when you are performing, experience it with you. Makes everything else goes away, present when you sing. Make everything go away. Amazing.

S. In your body and soul and someone in there trying to climb out.

R. Name Drops, this competition has every flavor, bluesy thing, I love you, love the artist and individuality. Being an artist is about being individual today (as if that was never true at any other time in history)

"RE: Phillip Phillips"
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 09:30 PM
So if being an artist is about individuality, why does the show always try to make sure their winners are the WGWG? Why was Heejun shotgunned into losing himself? Why are we still here? Do you know who's trying to crawl out of Phillip? Phillip. And Nigel will do anything to stop it.

As for the performance... I'm going to recycle someone else's line (random Worster, can't remember who to credit) here: My Little One-Trick Pony. After this many rounds, it's become clear that PSquared has only one genre/style he can work with and if he ever gets something he can't shoehorn into it, he's toast. But he's being protected on a Scotty level: every pitch will be in his wheelhouse until the end of the rigged game.

I'm drawing my own line in the sand. Either someone impresses me tonight or I'm going to watch something with a more credible script next week. Say, Axis Powers Hetalia.

I'm not joking.

"RE: Phillip Phillips"
Posted by zazzy on 03-29-12 at 09:46 AM
Well, since you mention it, why do you watch the show? You don't seem to like anyone's performances, ever. ???

As for P2, I disagree about his being TCO. This year a girl has a good shot at the win. If Jessica, then Hollie is her "shield", meaning when Hollie gets eliminated her votes migrate to Jessica.

I am happy there are so many performers worth listening to on a week by week basis. Certainly it helped that they got to choose from a broad theme this week instead of everyone having to sing Elton. And note that many of them (all of them?) sang songs they were already very well familiar with before idol and videos of their singing those songs can be found on you tube. That made for a better show last night (recalling the two-weeks-in-a row Beatles theme that AI7 was saddled with performing. Imagine Heyjun or Deandre singing Beatles 2 weeks in a row!).

I am enjoying Joshua, Hollie, P2 and Elise, Jessica and Colton are interesting, and Skylar, Heyjun and Deandre are capable of having something watchable, too.

"RE: Phillip Phillips"
Posted by mrc on 03-29-12 at 04:29 PM
Funny how well they sing when they get to pick songs they actually LIKE and KNOW instead of the stupid theme carp we always get!

A Slice of Manga

"VFTW insta-polling."
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 09:25 PM
Three options:

Stick with Heejun
Switch to DeAndre
Tell Nigel to finish sinking on his own and start watching The Voice

"RE: VFTW insta-polling."
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 09:58 PM
They are sticking with Heejun, at least if he sends someone else home, people will be peeved.
"Joshua Ledet"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 09:32 PM
Doing Mariah Carey. *remember to save the last bullet for yourself*

This show is making me feel stabby as well as shooty.

Without You, one of the most challenging 5 songs so says Jimmy. Stevie says it needs to look effortless.

"RE: Joshua Ledet"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 09:37 PM
Holy Vibrato, and so, he heard I was feeling stabby so got the chain-mail print blazer?

Rabbit out of a hat, you know that scream that rabbits make when they are grabbed by an eagle, that is the sound in my head right now.

R. Yo man, Mariah's birthday, she is on vacation, she would be proud of you. You have that giant voice, you need to sing big songs. I love you, that was flawless, what you did tonight it was emotional that is what the audience wants. Transference of emotion.

S. Everyone pushing beyond their limits, you have an emotional breakdown, get caught all up inside of it. Thanks for pouring your heart at.

J. Give me all those teeth, you were singing to me. A phenom, an angel, that voice is God-sent. We have such a soulful group, anybody can win, don't know what is going to happen. The shock seats are showing how amazing this group is because look how often we are standing up to keep from having our butts fried off.

"RE: Joshua Ledet"
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 09:40 PM
Please stop recapping panel comments. I can hear your sanity slipping.
"RE: Joshua Ledet"
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 09:38 PM
That jacket is so hideous as to be bulletproof. You can't look at it long enough to aim. Not that I want Joshua hurt in any way. I want the show dead. So keep the jacket away from Nigel at all costs.

The dead trees were stolen from X-Factor. The wandering was stolen from Pia. The truth is dead. There will never be truth again. I have heard more truth from a GOP debate. Who wants to turn this into a political audition for musical stump speeches? I wouldn't watch it, but at least we could get the network switched.

I stay with this show because I'm waiting for The Moment. There will be no Moments this year. It takes an individual to have a Moment. And we don't have any.

"RE: Joshua Ledet"
Posted by zazzy on 03-29-12 at 09:51 AM
OK. now I know why you watch the show. Whose moment in the past have you enjoyed?
"RE: Joshua Ledet"
Posted by Estee on 03-29-12 at 12:29 PM
The last performance I considered to be breakout level was Adam on Mad World.

So it's been a while.

"RE: Joshua Ledet"
Posted by zazzy on 03-29-12 at 12:42 PM
Yes. That one stayed with me for awhile, too. Good one.
"Madonna Medley"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 09:43 PM
Hollie, Skylar, and Jessica.
"RE: Madonna Medley"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 09:46 PM
It takes a special kind of talent to make Madonna look like an amazing singer, and these three have it in spades.

R. Very fun. Love these throwback medleys. Very Nice.

"One last chance."
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 09:47 PM
It's Elise or human personifications of nations.

"Elise Testone"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 09:51 PM
Ryan threatening us with Idol 24/7

Whole Lotta Love - Led Zeppelin Jimmy makes Stevie and Elise Harmonize together.

"RE: Elise Testone"
Posted by Snidget on 03-28-12 at 09:55 PM
This is not making me want to cut myself. This means she's going home this week.

They clap, and finally stand up.

J. I didn't wanna get up, you made me get up.

S. Wasn't sure how you were going to pull that off, made Robert Plant proud.

J. Some rock star stuff, you made me get up, it was crazy.

R. I don't know what is in the air, everyone wants to win this thing. That is the hardest song, all the flavor you put in that, congrats.

Her pants look like Tylers.

"Know when to walk away..."
Posted by Estee on 03-28-12 at 10:06 PM
http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0467.html

...know when to run.

Too little, too late. Elise was the best singer of the night -- arguably the only singer of the night -- but the nature of the show and voter base means she's probably still B3 this week and gone before the leaves sprout. And as far as this season is concerned, I'm going to beat her out the door.

Let me know which WGWG wins.

Eventually.

And with that, Nigel gets to hear another *click*.

"RE: AI 11 Top 9 Performance Show ECST"
Posted by zazzy on 03-29-12 at 09:59 AM
I enjoyed nearly the whole show. There are so many who could win at this point and that is different than in years' past.

Remember, Kristy Lee Cook and Sanjaya made it to 7th place their years and Scott Savol made the top 5. We have enough talent that Heyjun and Deandre should not make it that far (although Heyjun could make 7th like Sanjaya did).

Anyone else out there enjoy the show? This thread is for fans as well as detractors. ;)

"Uh Oh."
Posted by zazzy on 03-29-12 at 12:43 PM
From idolforums:

"Ryan said on the radio this morning there is going to be a shocking elimination tonight."

"RE: Uh Oh."
Posted by TWoman on 03-29-12 at 03:06 PM
Sounds like Hollie or Jessica. (Although fingers crossed it's Colton)