URL: http://community.realitytvworld.com/cgi-sys/cgiwrap/rtvw2/community/dcboard.cgi
Forum: DCForumID110
Thread Number: 29
[ Go back to previous page ]

Original Message
"Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"

Posted by tribephyl on 06-15-07 at 05:43 AM
*ding*ding* Pirates midship!
It's time to discuss morale.
I hear we've been having lots of complaints?

What's that Loupert? JD is mean? Awww...I'm sorry, we'll make sure to fix that right up quick.
Next...?

Alexis? What's up? Your arms are sore and you're tired?
Oh.
Well that'll teach you to think again before dragging Kendra around now won't it.

Laurel?
*holds hand up*
Wait.
Who's Laurel?
*whispers into MB's ear*
How'd she get on the boat? Has she been here a long time?
Oh.
*refocuses on Laurel*
Sorry, Laurel, you were saying?
This is difficult? No s**t sherlock. Thanks for noticing.
Sheesh.

What's that Jupiter? You LOVE being a pirate?!
Yes!! Finally! Did everyone hear what Jupiter just said?
Now stop your beeching and get to stroking my chest!

Allrighty then...fine...the Chest of Zanzibar!
Let's take a look inside.
Hmmm, important treasure hidden by semi-important faux-pirate.
Let's pick teams.
Loupert? Good news buddy, you get to be on the winning team. You too Jay. Oh and Alexis, I'm sorry girl, but by walking to the treasure instead of riding in a boat will probably result in your being even more sore and tired. Get a clue.

Congrats to Team RED! And Cap'n Azmyth!

Wait.
What?
Cap'n Azmyth? I though that was a plant? Carp. You mean we're revealing clues like weeks ahead of time?
So how does that help our....oh nevermind.

By the way, what kind of secret tonic have we been soaking the cap'ns hat in lately? English Freakfast?

What's with the accent, Cap'n Strangeasfvck?
Tea and crumpets on you, you freaking weirdo.

Allrighty, let's get straight to the three "Block Mocks".

Hmm..
Laurel. Complains to much. Check.
Alexis. Complains to much. Check.
Cheryl. For Strategic purposes. Huh? Okay.

Well, it seems that promising a cat-fight and not delivering along with complaing about dragging the same wet cat around AND complaining about the soreness derived from dragging said wet cat around will indeed spell one's undoing. Oh that and one broken promise. (Good luck with that one Sean.)

Alexis. The crew has spoken. Time to cut you free.

Alas, I hardly miss thee.



You can call me Daddo.


* Just a reminder that it is best to keep your BeThe siggies in the BeThe threads. Posting in character elsewhere can lead to confusion for our newer boardmembers. Thanks boatloads.


Table of contents

Messages in this discussion
"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by dragonflies on 06-15-07 at 07:35 AM
Well, it is what it is. What.evah.


arrrrrgh!

Sheesh, I lost my be the pirate and dancer all in one night!


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by Estee on 06-18-07 at 08:14 AM
Contrary to popular belief, I do not cast people to lose. I do, however, occasionally pick a few to see if they hang themselves with their own tongues. Behold the fashion princess, who believes that everyone must conform to her standards or cease to exist -- then forgets just whose runaway she's standing on, at least until the moment it turned out to be a plank. You're either in or you're out, Alexis -- and you're out.

I invented that, you know.

Note to production: did anyone remember to drill that tiny hole in the middle of the raft?



"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by jbug on 06-15-07 at 09:01 AM
Good Grief! The cameras ignore me: Cameron, you ignore me!
Jupiter steals my make up kit and starts to work on the guys. Claiming to be the make up expert! Yea, right! Read my bio, you h*s*y! *I* do the make up. At least that's what MB tole me I'd be doin when we discussed my role here.

Why am I even on this boat?


Honored by Tribe


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by Estee on 06-18-07 at 08:16 AM
Why am I even on this boat?

Emergency rations.



Azmyth would like to start with a little something off the hip.


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by emydi on 06-15-07 at 10:28 AM
*Gets in lawyer mode*

Joe Don's a tool

*sits down*

Girls (Kendra) I'll carry you...

Bows

*rolls eyes*

Oh fer Christian's sake, SHUT UP Joe Don...


Now I have to go find Sean and Azmyth...I got some swabbin' to do...


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by vince3 on 06-15-07 at 11:09 AM
LAST EDITED ON 06-15-07 AT 11:10 AM (EST)

That wasn't what you said before when we weren't part of the crew, miss grabaloons.....


Remember when? Because I didn't...


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by cahaya on 06-20-07 at 06:11 PM
I'll be back ta haunt ye, aye, ye scurvy knave.


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by vince3 on 06-20-07 at 09:32 PM
*wakes up*

Whazzat? *Looks around* Oh, it was just an Outcast/Ghost Ship Nigerian Nightmare......

*Yawn*



"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by RudyRules on 06-15-07 at 12:54 PM
LAST EDITED ON 06-15-07 AT 12:55 PM (EST)

Let's see... the phony English dude that took over my ship hasn't replaced me with that tacky striped flag (yet).
I'll keep me eye on the goings on among those slimy dog deckhands.

And bide me time...


I've been Tribed!



"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by sporkman on 06-15-07 at 01:27 PM
All is going as I planned it. Now I'm back to blending in with the rest of the bilge rats. Jay and Joly Ol' Cap'n Azmyth wanted J.D. and Cheryl gone, while they ignored the true brains of the original officers. Remember how I told J.D. he should give the weaker crew members black spots? What Strategy! Although I'm not sure how J.D. figures that Christian was one of the weaker crew members.




"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by Estee on 06-18-07 at 08:19 AM
It may be time to pull out a few more of Ben's 'Look at me, everybody! I'm flying under the radar!' moments and place them into the final edit. Production, how much of that footage do we have from the first three episodes?

Eighteen hours.

Not counting the times he says it in his sleep.

Well, at least he's not stripping off his clothes and running around claiming he's invisible.



New identifer for Ben's profession: Bard. Alignment: Awful Stupid.


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by sporkman on 06-18-07 at 04:30 PM
Actually, did you see me up in the crows nest? Look at me everyone! I'm sailing way above the radar!! That is until we get to the next treasure, then I'm going to hide in the middle of the pack, or near the back if there's some nice booty in my crew.


What happened to the realistic costumes for the women? I didn't enjoy the past episode as much the first two.


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by Spanky68 on 06-15-07 at 02:31 PM
God save the Queen. Tea and crumpets. Oasis is the best band ever, eh? Jolly good show, old chap.

Dang, that is all the English lines I can think of. So I will just adapt a cheesy English accent.

I am the captain now, harrr harrrr!!

Here, I am going to shower you all with gold. Gold...shower. It seems I've made another witty remark. Fancy that, eh mate?

Joe Dumb, I wish to thank you immensely for making my path to power easier. Thanks to your money-grubbing ways, the crew will love me until my "accent" annoys them enough to keel haul me.

Until then, let's go get some more of Captain Crunch's booty.

Sorry about throwing you under the lorrie, Laurel. But you seem to be lazy and have an unfit attitude. Chin up, my deary.

Alexis: show some cheer or bugger off.

Cheryl: you remind me of a deputy barrister...er solicitor who once tried to throw the book at me for possessing too much medicinal marajuana. So I want you OFF MY SHIP!!!

What..a tie? Alexis is still not flashing more cleavage at me gratefully or offering to swab my deck? Well then, be gone, Alexis. Just having big fun bags is not enough to keep you around. Shove off, ya scurvy dog.


it could've been worse. I could have gone all hip-hop when I put on the captain's cap!


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by dreamerbeliever on 06-15-07 at 03:44 PM
Cheerio and pip pip? I know they have some good ganja down in the Caribbean, but that doesn't mean you have to try to smoke it all at once.


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by tribephyl on 06-15-07 at 09:24 PM
the crew will love me until my "accent" annoys them enough to keel haul me.

Which according to my Madonnaometer was exactly 2 seconds after you started speaking like a gay fashion designer.

It's not funny. It actually cheapens you.
But then so does giving all of your winnings.

Sadly, for you, this isn't America's favorite good-guy contest.
It's Pirate Master!

Without the requisite backstabbing and pillaging you'll be cut asea faster then you can say Pickadilly.



You can call me Daddo.


"Note to Production and Medical"
Posted by Estee on 06-18-07 at 08:20 AM
The dosage on the hidden hat needle still needs some work.



"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by dreamerbeliever on 06-15-07 at 03:37 PM
Louie finds the treasure, Louie dethrones the evil captain, and you scumbums don't take advantage of it! Louie wants all of you off of his ship and out of his adventure.


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by vince3 on 06-15-07 at 03:40 PM

Funny, you and I looked like old pals before the vote, didn't we? We even had a fist bump!



"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by dreamerbeliever on 06-15-07 at 03:58 PM
LAST EDITED ON 06-15-07 AT 04:00 PM (EST)

Arr just keeping my mortal arch enemy close until I slit ye throat. Clearly the new Captain is whacked out on the leaf, but I'll get your worthless hide one of these days.

What's up with you crying like a little wench about Louie trying to rally support to take out one of your lap dogs? This is Louie’s adventure and he can do as he pleases. Someday these wannabes will stop playing the game with their heads and start using their hearts, like the only true pirate, Louie.


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by vince3 on 06-16-07 at 04:04 PM
Why do I get the feeling that when they start playing with their hearts, you're gonna be the one set adrift?



"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by dreamerbeliever on 06-18-07 at 01:41 PM
I have just one thing to say ...


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by ARnutz on 06-15-07 at 08:05 PM
When the booty is split... all you really have is an a$$crack, right?


Aye, Matey, me booty has been tribed!


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by tribephyl on 06-15-07 at 09:27 PM
Sign me up! Azzcrack 8 ways sounds delicious. Er... expensive. Umm... I mean fair.


You can call me Daddo.


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by ARnutz on 06-15-07 at 10:03 PM
*flashes booty azzcrack @ the Daddio*



Aye, Matey, me booty has been tribed!
It's like an azzcrack buffet!


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by tribephyl on 06-15-07 at 10:49 PM
*flashes hairy chest @ the booty*


Make it all you can eat...er grab ... and I'm never leaving!


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by qwertypie on 06-16-07 at 09:29 AM
I am feeling so neglected -- No shots of me puking, no mortal injuries, no black spot! SIGH.




I've been planked by Tribe!


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by tribephyl on 06-16-07 at 03:35 PM
Oh oops. Sorry about that Joy. I really thought you were already cut adrift.
I'll make sure to have the camera guys focus on you more in the coming week.

Doing my part to completely ignore Nessa.

"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by qwertypie on 06-17-07 at 02:54 PM
Much obliged, kind sir!



I've been planked by Tribe!


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by Estee on 06-18-07 at 08:22 AM
Oh, so now it talks. Not only that, it's starting to think it's in charge of the camera crew.

Well, at least we found out where the rest of that dosage went.

It will pay. It knows that, doesn't it?


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by jbug on 06-18-07 at 11:55 AM
Doing my part to completely ignore Nessa.

I've noticed!


Honored by Tribe


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by agman on 06-18-07 at 01:58 PM
Don't worry Nessa, eveyone ignores me too!

Keelhauled by tribe


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by emydi on 06-18-07 at 03:24 PM
*ahem* look above



where do you want me to start?


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by RudyRules on 06-19-07 at 10:41 AM
LAST EDITED ON 06-19-07 AT 10:42 AM (EST)

*ahem* look above

That'd me ye see up there.
Remove thy cap when gazin' upon your emblem!



Tribe hauled me up the pole!



"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by agman on 06-16-07 at 10:54 PM
Well Alexis me wench, I'd say I be feeling sorry for ya, but I gots me too much cooking to do

Keelhauled by tribe



"Note to Captain Azmyth"
Posted by Estee on 06-18-07 at 08:25 AM
While it's a little unusual for me to ackowledge a contestant's mere existence, let alone a request from one, I have decided to entertain your wish and grant your desire.

Therefore, as per your spoken hope, all of your personal treasure has been replaced with Crunchberries.

Have a nice day.

Make fun of my total lie legend of the sea, will he?


"RE: Note to Captain Azmyth"
Posted by Spanky68 on 06-18-07 at 12:21 PM
Hey don't take it out on me. Almost everyone who's seen the show is making fun of your "legend".



"RE: Note to Captain Azmyth"
Posted by Estee on 06-18-07 at 01:02 PM
And amazingly, the first one I can punish for it is right in front of me wearing an oversized hamentashen, you British twit. This game is all about luck and timing. You don't have the second, and the first just ran out.

Well, that's not actually what the game is about, but I'm still not letting any of you see the rulebook.



I'm an Ozite. Try to guess how I feel about Brits. Just guess.


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by The Cake on 06-18-07 at 08:39 PM
Whether it be by van or by boat, on land or at sea, I've always been a pirate at heart. Me mates must know this to be true, even after the fake British capatin branded me with the dreaded black mark, not one vote was cast me way. Although some seemed not to even know I was part of the crew, and starred at me as if they had never laid eyes on me before. So it must have been my well thought out pleas to the crew that inspired them to keep me. Or perhaps it was my pirate-like giggle at the end of my plea that sealed the deal.



"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by Spanky68 on 06-18-07 at 09:11 PM
bly me. I finally acknowledge your existence and this is how you repay me?

I ....ooops. Tea time. I'm off for scones and marmalade.



"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by Bravehart on 06-19-07 at 04:43 PM
Ahoy! All you scallywags better be addressing me as Mister Jay!
(not of Next top model) Although most of yous remind me of models...

Me loves my new Capeetain! Azmyth rocks! Accent or not!

Sean me mate, we haven't actually see any grub from you! Waaasss up? But you be the hero of da sabotage you dog! Ye betrayed da vote! I'll be after yer blood next week fer sure! Da lovely's luv ya so's it be hard to get rid of you.

Rupert lite: Yer good to me fer now due to yer simple, single minded plans, yer an asset to me crew!

My Capn ship's need strong pirates now, I need allainces!

BTW, Cameron, ye be too soft tungued of a host, we needs da likes of Johnny Depp or Kieth Richards to bring da ratings up! Hey Mark Burnett be ye payin attention!?

I be da blue collar pirate (I bee stealin dubloons from poor unsuspecting car buyers). I told yer sorry a**es before, I be gettin all da loot and I am gettin it! First as da Boatsman and now as Officer I am in command. Me crew of alliances with Kendra, JD, Jupiter, Azmyth gives me strong standin to da end boys, to da end!

Aren't I the Captain????



"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by Spanky68 on 06-20-07 at 12:08 PM
Me loves my new Capeetain! Azmyth rocks! Accent or not!

Spot on, Jay! Spot on! Jolly good show, old chap.


"RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.3"
Posted by dreamerbeliever on 06-21-07 at 00:04 AM
Rupert lite: Yer good to me fer now due to yer simple, single minded plans, yer an asset to me crew!

Arr me half brother had Boston Rawb and Louie be havin' you. Just no backstabbing and thinking strategically. Louie don’t like players who think of the win at any cost.

Where is the blur girl? Louie has a bone to pick with that wench. No blurs last episode because of a sports bra. Don't she be knowin' the ratings are in the tank and we need those oobies flopping around to stay on the air!