LAST EDITED ON 01-13-04 AT 10:43 AM (EST)

Producers: Ok, Larissa, we're here to consult with you about your decisions for elimination. Please remember though, that although we "consult" with you, all of your final decisions are your own. *wink, wink, nudge, nudge* So what are your thoughts? You seem to be making some connections.

Larissa: I want all of the fat guys gone.

Producers: Umm, ok. You seemed to like Donato and Sean. What about them?

Larissa: I want all of the fat guys gone.

Producers: Well, we certainly see your point. Fat people are completely disgusting and don't deserve to be given a chance at all, but we have to include them in the show just like we have to include blacks or minorities. We don't want to be accused of being racist! We really lucked out with Phuc- he's fat and a minority! But just let us give you some "advice". If you eliminate all of the fat guys at once, you will be perceived as being shallow and self-centered. May we suggest that you only eliminate a few of the chubbier contestants? It will make you look better in the long run.

Larissa: Hmm, I hadn't thought of it like that. Ok. So let's see... there are 5 fat guys, so how about if I eliminate 4 of them? All that I really need is one to stay so that if people accuse me of being shallow I can say "Well, I kept ________ so obviously I am not shallow!"

Producers: Perfect! What a great idea! So which one are you going to choose?

Larissa: Does it matter? Let's put their names in a hat, and I'll pick one.

Producers write down the names: Sean, Donato, Phuc, Bill, and Samuel. Larissa sticks her dainty hand in the hat...

Larissa: Ok, I'll keep Sean. Whatever. Not like it matters. Panicking: I can eliminate him next time, right?

Producers: Of course you can! We're not monsters! And besides, you make the decisions around here- we're just here for support. *chuckles and giggles* pause But we do have some bad news. It turns out Justin has to leave because his personality died and he has to go to the funeral, so that only leaves 1 other person for you to annihilate, I mean eliminate, instead of 2.

Larissa: YOU MEAN I CAN ONLY KICK OFF 1 OF THOSE SKINNY GEEKS? Ugh, this reality show life is harder than I thought. Well, I would like to get rid of the midget breakdancer, or the Jesus freak... I would really love to get rid of that David spaz, but I haven't asked him how he keeps his hair so bouncy and curly yet, so I have to keep him. Oh hell, let's just do the hat thing again. It's not like any of these guys have a chance anyhow! Are you out of your phucking mind? As if!

SilverStar