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Thread Number: 1776
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Original Message
"Be the Amazing Racer 16.7"
Posted by Seana on 03-29-10 at 03:27 AM
The Turtle moves. Slowly. Sometimes quickly. Not always in a straight line. And you must lure it with a banana.

Hey, did I look good in my diving gear or what? I know you didn't get to see as much as when I wore my swimsuit to go running in Russia in the winter, but I'm still in damn fine shape.

And viewers at home will be happy to note that although we bunched everyone at the airport in the very beginning, completely obliterating Mike and Louie's lead, we showed everyone's start time. So now everyone knows that Mike and Louie were nearly an hour ahead of the next team and 4 hours ahead of the last team.

Oh, sorry Gnome, we're replacing you with 7-Up this episode. You'll have to just wait until next time. Money talks and even lame products get placed if the $$$ says so.

Steve and Allie, you're team #1! You get a 7-Up prize pack including money! And dinner with pop! (Or soda or coke or whatever you call it in your part of the world. I will refrain from using the word "isogloss" or discussing dialectical differences in North American English.)

Dan and Jordan, yes, you're team #2. Thank goodness for that initial airport bunching or you'd have been 3 hours behind the leaders.

Brent and Caite: Ah, another weak team that benefitted from the fact that there was only one flight to this island. Way to squabble and bicker.

Louie and Mike: You're not my favourite team to see in swimsuits, I can tell you. I can also tell you that I was expecting better from you this leg. My gawd, Brent and Caite beat you.

Carol and Brandy: Brent and Caite beat you. You're a strong team. There's no excuse for this. No excuse.

Jet and Cord: Well, you're last. It's a Speed Bump for you next leg. And you were doing so well. Have you run out of steam then? We even had a challenge with livestock in it.


Come play! The characters still available are: Mike, Steve, Cord, Carol, Brandy, Dan and Jordan.

Don't want to commit? Post as a tortoise or that guy who got to say "You didn't load all your bananas."

Table of contents
Messages in this discussion
"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 16.7"
Posted by LibraRising on 03-29-10 at 11:24 AM
The lesbos r still hear? Thats unpossible!


its not fare. i quit.

"Brent is --"
Posted by Estee on 03-29-10 at 02:09 PM
-- The Unpossible Man!

There really is a resemblance.

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 16.7"
Posted by MissMyth on 03-29-10 at 11:28 AM
Cord, dude, I'm beginning to think that we should not reproduce.

'scuse me, gotta go work on my country song. Uh, what rhymes with "My gravy"?

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 16.7"
Posted by Max Headroom on 03-29-10 at 12:35 PM
Like, why are those lesbians so MEAN to us? You know, I was, like, only in a couple of pageants, you know? Like I'd carry my tiaras with me on a race? As if.

And it's not my fault that Brent can't keep track of his nuts.

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 16.7"
Posted by Estee on 03-29-10 at 12:55 PM
The Turtle moves.

Oh, great A'Tuin...

Can we strap Brent to a rapidly-heating metal shell now?

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 16.7"
Posted by Seana on 03-29-10 at 09:32 PM
I dunno. I'm kinda hoping for a somewhat smaller turtle to come plummeting out of the sky and hit him in the head.
"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 16.7"
Posted by LibraRising on 03-30-10 at 01:36 PM
Haha, the jokes on u, getting hit on the head might make me more smarter like in cartoons.


the homer simpson of TAR -- getting dumber every week

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 16.7"
Posted by Belle Book on 03-29-10 at 07:23 PM
We're in first? WE'RE IN FIRST, DAD!

Wow, I can't believe it! And we didn't have to go back for our bags! Now let's see if we can return to the Detour course and pick them up -- I'm sure we left them there.


"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 16.7"
Posted by Molaholic on 03-30-10 at 00:55 AM
Welcome to the island nation of Shyshouls -- err, Seeshoos -- err, Seychelles. Even the natives have trouble saying the name. Good thing we all speak English here.

I'm glad I impressed the detectives with my six-pack. It took a lot of work hoisting those coconuts all night long.

Something to remember -- there are times when you just have to look behind you. You never know what might be there (coconuts, bottles, backpacks, pi$$ed-off lesbians...)

Finally, congratulations to Steve & Allie for their win. Hope you enjoy the lime & the cola-nut® feast. And Cowboys, gird your loins for another kick-ass Speed Bump (heck, it may even take you something like 38 seconds to complete!)


Seana did another one.