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Original Message
"Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Seana on 11-05-07 at 00:09 AM
LAST EDITED ON 11-05-07 AT 00:38 AM (EST)

Quick tip: Don't hit "Enter" if you mean to hit "Tab". You'll post and look silly.

******

From the Playboy mansion (everybody wave to Victoria!) to the Connemara Heritage Centre. After this, there will be 10 more Pit Stops, of which 8 will have eliminations. Ah! What's this? My pants appear to be on fire. How did that happen?

Oh come on, like we could *actually* have a season with no non-elims.

And will you all please stop honking and just drive?

Hank and Azaria! (You don't mind if I call you "Hank"? Hedd-Ikea or whatever is hard to say.) Despite going the wrong way at the beginning, you got it together and came in first. You're going to love Banff.

Kynt and Vyxsin: Oh my goth! You're in second. And you only drew attention to your Gothishness, what? 50 times? Well done. You'll practially blend right in with the other Racers if you keep such a low Goth profile.

TK and Rachel: OK, remember when you were at the airport in Shannon and you thought you were in last place? That wasn't the time to fall apart.

Lorena and Jason: Holy heck, Lorena, calm down. Jason, I can see why you might tune her out, but let me tell you, being overconfident about directions has been the downfall of more than one team. Addtionally, you have used up your allotment of calling Lorena "baby". Please stop now.

Nicolas and Donald: A bit under the radar this leg. Donald, how's the foot? I would hate for you to be so injured that you have to wear some kind of bionic-looking device on your leg.

Shana and Jennifer: Not much opportunity for jiggling at the locals to get them to help you, but you got a bit of practice at the end of the last task with that little kiss on the cheek.

Ronald and Christina: Ronald seems to be having the time of his life.

Kate and Pat: Please stop saying "baby". I'm not sure which one of you is doing it, but stop. Please. Please!

Marianna and Julia: I can't tell you two apart yet.

Nathan and Jennifer: Oh, you just squeaked in. I feel compelled to tell you that donkeys don't respond well to shrieking and screaming. Good thing you ran into that local who told you about saying "hey nonny nonny" and such or I'd be eliminating you out at the farm.

Ari and Staella: You're the last team to arrive. I'm afraid that karma came in the form of an ass to bite you on yours. Begone.


Administrative Notes: Please keep the game in the game thread.

Characters not spoken for: Either Jennifer, Pat or Christina

Come play! Ask to be an unclaimed character or post as a cameraman, soundperson, cabbie or whatever!

If your character has been eliminated, post from Sequesterville!

Table of contents
Messages in this discussion
"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by dabo on 11-05-07 at 02:34 AM

I'm having trouble telling who is who. Which Goth is Heckle and which Jeckle?


"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Max Headroom on 11-05-07 at 07:55 AM
Jeez Lorena, pipe down. How am I supposed to drive us to victory with you harping on me from the back seat? I read the map, and I know where I'm going.

*reaches into backpack for earplugs*

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by CwazyWabbit on 11-07-07 at 03:28 PM
*in full whine*
But you were gooooing the wrong waaaaaay! You neeeeeed to listen to meeeeee! I knoooooow these things! We neeeeeed to commuuuuuuuunicate!

*exasperated deep breath*

My emotions. They sure get the best of me. It can't be that I actually have a legitimate reason to be frustrated with the man I chose. If only we were married. It would make this situation all better. I know it would. Why won't he listen to me?



Next time I will whisper my whine, but you have to promise to listen to me, okaaaaaay?

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Max Headroom on 11-08-07 at 08:37 AM
Did you say something?

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by ARnutz on 11-05-07 at 08:35 AM
Do I look like a Hank to you? Pffft!

It's Hen-DUH-Key-Uh

Try it with me...

Oh, whatever! We came in first!!! See what happens when my big bro listens to me?



He's definitely got to trust me more.

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by jbug on 11-05-07 at 09:26 AM
LOL! Until we got to this pit stop, I had your names confused. I thought you were Azaria and your brother was Hendekea. So, maybe Henchick will be easier to say and will help with the gender problem. kay?


"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by cahaya on 11-05-07 at 12:27 PM
Hey, watch it, sister. You two are the other sisters.

My sister? She's a tiger! (*growl*)

(*happy dance with sis*) We won a trip!

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Cygnus X1 on 11-05-07 at 04:35 PM
LAST EDITED ON 11-05-07 AT 04:45 PM (EST)

I remember Hendekea. I was stationed there during 'Nam.


And lemme tell you, the poi was quite crappy.

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by jbug on 11-05-07 at 09:18 AM
LAST EDITED ON 11-05-07 AT 09:19 AM (EST)

Marianna and Julia: I can't tell you two apart yet.

We're not sure yet either. But at least we made it this time! I think I started out the driving this time - being the oldest and all, I get to drive first.
But after that? I'm not sure which of us did what...... do you know sister?

Oh, and what's with the pronunciation of my name? huh? I almost didn't answer when you called me.


"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Cyndimaus on 11-05-07 at 03:37 PM
We were way too boring this episode. Not much airtime. At least WE figured out how to get our donkey going again, huh sis?

Yeah, I can't tell us apart yet either. I think you wore your hair in a pony tail for most of the time and called me some sort of sisterly nickname/term of enderement.

And I'm so glad we didn't get eliminated. We just didn't have time to show our stuff much.

As for your name, we must pronounce it as we would if we weren't U.S. citizens. Did you realize we are one of the minority teams this season? Cool, huh? I also think we're the best looking minority team. (do you count the blondes as minority because of brain capacity?)


"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by warp_core breach on 11-05-07 at 03:45 PM
Duh! I'm not a minority. I'm Irish.

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by mikey on 11-05-07 at 09:29 AM
Hey, Grampa. Quick, let's go, everyone's waiting for us. What are you reading? Hey, did you get that at the playboy mansion. What are you doing back there? Eww, please don't get any on the seats. Okay, you're ready to go now but you're kind of sleepy? But we have a race....


"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Cygnus X1 on 11-05-07 at 04:40 PM
That? Was the inflight magazine, in case anyone asks I'll have you know! (Ixnay on ointingpay out the ainstay!)

Now help me find my %*#@ing foot shoe.


Panty raid tonight?

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Sunny_Bunny on 11-05-07 at 09:41 AM

Nyah Nyah Nyah. You can't make me tote peat AND manure with legs.

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Denalio on 11-08-07 at 05:47 AM
Aren't screeching, screaming and threatening to cut up a donkey to eat him acceptable motivational techniques? I use this strategy on Ari all the time and he seems to enjoy it. I am so confused, you stupid broken donkey! I even shook my finger at you while I yelled at you. Flo used this technique with Zach and they won the whole race!

Who knew we picked the donkey called "Karma"?



Stoopid Donk

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Sunny_Bunny on 11-08-07 at 06:56 PM

I am not broken, and despite the large ears, I don't listen to threats, screeching and screaming - unless the threats are coming from the Brownies, and the screams are coming from their human victims playthings.

Actually, you were quite lucky that you still have your finger. Thankfully I had been well fed before you two morons showed up.

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by beau_30 on 11-05-07 at 09:52 AM
We ran a great leg Vysxin who would've thought that us Goths had it them. I mean Goth is a spirtual thing that takes you to a whole another world. Being Goth isn't about being freakish is about respecting the underworld.

I believe us goths would be able to make it for 1 million dollars. Vysxin what are you going to do with your half of the million. I'm going to try and look like Marylin Manson. What about you. Marylin is my favorite Goth of all time.


"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by bystander on 11-06-07 at 12:05 PM
Kynt? Did you take my eyeliner? And that's my shirt. Isn't being Goth just the best thing ever? And Goth's from Kentucky are like Mormons from Vegas. I may donate my half of the million dollars to a plastic surgeon so that you and I can become anatomically correct Goth twins.

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by mjames1229 on 11-06-07 at 06:00 PM
So, when you are on Day 22 of the race, and you are in a tent in India, or on an ice covered mountain in the Andes, will you spend three hours of your 12-hour pit-stop doing each other's make up?

Continuing the idea, Vyxsin (if that is your real name), won't your roots be showing about the same time?

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by beau_30 on 11-07-07 at 11:14 AM
My make up is actually always on. I don't always take it off. I sleep with it on.

Vysxin that is my shirt, remember that time when we were at band camp.

Hey Phil, want some make up. I could make you look pretty at the next pitstop. I mean We could make you look like Gene Simmons, if anybody knew that Gene Simmons is actually a goth as well.

But my Role Model is Marylin Mansion.


"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by dragonflies on 11-05-07 at 12:34 PM
This is so much fun dude! Hey, did you see my Rachel kick some butt?! You know she only weighs 100 pounds? She was beating some of those strong guys on this leg

Bring it on Phil! Make each leg more challenging! Hey, when do I get to swim? Cause you know I will be.


we are so rockin dude!

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by mrc on 11-05-07 at 12:41 PM
OMG! You mean I lost weight to get on Jay Leno's show, put up with his crap about me being an intern just to gain back my weight back and put on a bandana? At least TAR could have given me an ass I liked to slap!


Ari=Ross the Intern's alter ego. No lie.

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Denalio on 11-08-07 at 06:19 AM
Oh Ari - Are you going to start a talky blog now? Can I be on it? Also I was impressed with you during our aerial bike ride. You really know how to hang onto your pole. You could talk about that on your talky blog.


"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by mrc on 11-05-07 at 12:43 PM
Let me express my disappointment in Phil. He never even took us out of the bag to play a round, much less put us on display. I am VERY disappointed in him.

What is Phil's golf equipment?

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by moonbaby on 11-05-07 at 06:48 PM
I know exactly how you feel.

*sigh*


"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Peetah on 11-05-07 at 02:11 PM
WHO'S YOUR DADDY?!!!

Darling daughter, I had a great time racing with you so far! (You are my daughter, right? I really haven't looked at you that closely before) As a busy VP of a paper supply company (Dunder-Mifflin, Walla Walla branch), I haven't focused on you. Heh, I can't see you for the forest of paper.

I love Ireland...*sings* Oh, Danny Boy, the pipes... the pipes are calling,
From glen to glen and down the mountain side...

I hope someone signs up to be my daughter soon, she can totally take me to task for that "singing". I'm sure I embarressed her.


"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by warp_core breach on 11-05-07 at 03:44 PM
Oh I wish we could have spent more time at the Play Boy mansion! Hmmm, maybe after the race we can audition for Heff and get to be on The Girls Next Door... but hey, we're going to Ireland, we're going to Ireland, we're going to Ireland! I'm Irish and that's why I'm so excited to be going to Ireland, ya know.

We so intend to flirt our way through the race. Couldn't do much flirting in rain suits but we flirted with the donkey and he pulled us from last place! Oh did I tell you I'm Irish?


"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Ontheroadagain on 11-05-07 at 05:13 PM
LAST EDITED ON 11-05-07 AT 05:14 PM (EST)

OK, OK, maybe I was a little hard on the a$$, but did you hear all that noise it was making. And the donkey was a pain too.

>

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by emydi on 11-06-07 at 01:48 PM
*shows teeth*

*brays*

*does not budge*

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Ontheroadagain on 11-06-07 at 04:18 PM
PUSH, DONKEY, PUSH.

Maybe together we can get Jennifer to shut up and move along.

>

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by mattben on 11-05-07 at 09:06 PM
Customs Man here! Hello, Fellow Travelers.

Yes, I'm your disrespected bored underpaid Ministry of State Departments bureaucrat helping you speed through the choke points on your travels. I am a specter who will inhabit many host body shells as we go along. Have your papers ready! I also moonlight as a cultural guide.

Please be polite, don't look nervous or sweat too much. And don't tape anything to your bodies except the microphones. Especially if we go to Turkey.

Happy trails to you, until we meet again.
Happy trails to you, keep smilin' until then.
Who cares about the clouds when we're together?
Just sing a song and bring the sunny weather.
Happy trails to you, 'till we meet again.

Some trails are happy ones,
Others are blue.
It's the way you ride the trail that counts,
Here's a happy one for you.

And don't forget your Papers! Maybe I'll see you at the end of our trips.

I accept tips.

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Cygnus X1 on 11-06-07 at 00:38 AM
Don't touch my bags if you please, Mr. Customs Man!


No reference to the Married Ministers intended. Yet.

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by MissMyth on 11-06-07 at 12:05 PM
LAST EDITED ON 11-06-07 AT 03:40 PM (EST)

Dad? Dad! Could you stop singing? It's not that I'm embarrassed, it's just that swinging here under your bicycle is already making me nauseous and the singing is just adding to it. Besides, don't know if you've noticed? But you're not Irish.

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Peetah on 11-06-07 at 03:33 PM
Sorry, princess! I'm trying to reconnect with you be teaching you everything I know about Ireland. Even if it's only this drinking song I learned while travelling for business during your entire childhood.

I just didn't want to let you down!

(...You are my daughter, right?)

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by MissMyth on 11-06-07 at 03:50 PM
Of course I'm your daughter, silly Daddy.

(voice edges into a higher, whinier pitch)

You know, the one with degrees from Duke AND Princton? Worked for the State Department?

Geez, what's a girl gotta do to impress her absentee father?

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Peetah on 11-06-07 at 10:46 PM
You know, if you just applied yourself, then I might have noticed you for the past 25 years.

Haven't I done enough bonding over the past two days to make up for all that lost time?

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by mattben on 11-06-07 at 07:01 PM
Ari and Staella, CONGRATULATIONS! You finished in first place ... in the ever expanding list of last place duos. You two are the first into the soylent green hamster-driven shredder. *maniacal laughter*

Karma is having a hamster poop on your papers after they've been shredded.


Hee Haw!

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Denalio on 11-08-07 at 06:13 AM
*whines* Other teams got unfair advantages like why was it the "AirLingus" airplane we used - isn't that giving the Lesbians preferential treatment to use a Lesbian airline?

And then Ronald & Christina accused us of stealing their taxi, forcing us to lie which is so stressful and unfair!

And of course, our donkey was broken!

*Whines some more*



"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Sunny_Bunny on 11-08-07 at 07:00 PM

Are you sure you are not part donkey? I think you are, and I also think I know which half.

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Molaholic on 11-07-07 at 08:52 PM
Hello! And welcome to the Emerald Isle!

I'm very glad to see you here -- what with driving on the wrong side of the road, and rain, and that weird bicycle-high-wire-thingy.

Also, did they tell you about our donkeys? Seems as if they have a particularly strong union -- they must have a half-hour beer break somewhere along the route. It's up to them when and where, so be sure to collect the ration before you start.

Be Good!


Me.. on the left!

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Cygnus X1 on 11-07-07 at 11:04 PM
. . . 34 . . . 35 . . . 36 . . .
(don't interrupt me, kid, I'm counting)

. . . 57 . . . 58 . . . 59 . . .


66 . . . 68 . . . 80 . . . Dammit! Now I have to start over!

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by jbug on 11-08-07 at 11:48 AM
Move it Gramps! You're holding up the whole line!
You can count your money later (or pots & pans, or whatever, just get out of the way.)

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Cygnus X1 on 11-08-07 at 06:05 PM
Move it Gramps! You're holding up the whole line!

You know, I hear that every weeknight at Golden Corral.


Pssst . . . hey, babe, wanna see my blue-plate special?

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by smokeysmom on 11-08-07 at 02:22 PM
Gulp. I wanted to apologize for not being able to be "Pat" (insert Saturday Night Live sketch joke here!). I just landed a huge project which means I won't be anywhere near my TV for a long while and won't be able to join in.

Thank you so much for the siggie -- I hope I didn't keep any potential Pat's from playing. Smokeysmom


"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by Denalio on 11-08-07 at 08:52 PM
Hi! Actually you are "Kate" (although I still do not know which one is Kate and which is Pat) so it's OK with me if we just both call ourselves Pat (as in the SNL skit!)

And I am hoping Pat and Kate have a little more DAW time next episode since I only just nabbed the role of "Pat" once Staella's karma bit her ass.

Apparently our wonderful sig maker could figure out who was who and so Pat is the white haired one with glasses of the "Pats" and Kate is the smaller of the "Pats"

"RE: Be the Amazing Racer 12.1"
Posted by smokeysmom on 11-09-07 at 09:05 AM
D'oh! You're right -- shows you how scattered I am right now, doesn't it? Hope you find a new small Pat, er, I mean Kate and hopefully one who knows who she is