Congratulations go out to the team in the live broadcast control booth -- who, during the HoH competition, managed to treat all of America by forcing us to watch --

-- a guinea pig drinking from a water bottle.

Right. The East Coast broadcast got the guineas. (No idea if this echoed to the West yet -- the last time we had an error on this scale, it was repeated, but...) Either someone said or did something that a bleep couldn't cover and the panic button got very solidly hit -- or the show was once again being run with the kind of pristine competence that we normally see from the host and casting department. Regardless, Britney or K-Fed got some national airtime.

Nice work. Really.

Somewhere in sequester, Allison is counting the seconds on the air vs. the body position of the guinea and trying to spot the clue. Because Endemol is trying to torture her. By contract!

• RE: Because it was more interesting than the contestants.,Colonel Zoidberg, 08:15 AM, 03-06-08
  • RE: Because it was more interesting than the contestants.,Estee, 08:42 AM, 03-06-08
    • RE: Because it was more interesting than the contestants.,Colonel Zoidberg, 09:07 AM, 03-06-08
• And don't forget....,aquariaqueen, 08:18 AM, 03-06-08
• RE: Because it was more interesting than the contestants.,Snidget, 08:59 AM, 03-06-08

It's Big Brother. The same show that completely diffused the mind-blowing twist by explaining it five minutes before it happened, thereby taking all the potential excitement away from it. Granted, a Big Brother twist is to excitement what a common fireworks snake is to pyrotechnics, so it's a little like throwing a bucket of water on said snake, but give us something, will you?

Splitting up the couples? Potentially exciting, especially for those who like Ryan and hate Allison. Doing it as a post-eviction twist? Could have been fun. Explaining it right beforehand? That's just what we needed to the most fun this season has been - the air sucked out of the balloon, thereby creating a "Who gives a damn?" effect and making this twist about as exciting as Ohio State football's typical non-conference schedule.

And to follow it up with effing guinea pigs, the pet that not even a college student could make entertaining. Migawd, if Survivor and American Idol weren't so non-riveting, I might actually have found room in my DVR for Wife Swap again.

Which reminds me: this was supposed to be Big Brother: 'Til Death Do You Part. So what did we learn last night? We learned that sirens produce death and we're now watching the first-ever series set in the afterlife.

Guess which part.

The same one?

Now we just need a jaguar. A stoned Rocco may also work.

We had one of the houseguests scratching his crotch in the diary room!! (Sorry, can't remember which one, maybe Matt?)

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it" - Albert Einstein

More Guinea Pigs!
Less Hamsters!