URL: http://community.realitytvworld.com/cgi-sys/cgiwrap/rtvw2/community/dcboard.cgi
Forum: DCForumID54
Thread Number: 1183
[ Go back to previous page ]
Original Message
"Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by Cygnus X1 on 10-25-05 at 11:13 PM
LAST EDITED ON 10-27-05 AT 01:58 AM (EST)

Thought we weren’t leaving the U.S., huh? Well, here we are in Panama, home of Jack, the (Chinese-run) Canal, and Manuel Noriega – um, check that.

Did you spot the ringer we had in the baseball infield?

Yep, that was Bill Buckner who let the ball go through his legs! The rest of the team was the Hungarian water polo players from TAR 6.

You really need some other frame of reference for your Espanol than Speedy Gonzales, ok? At least you didn’t take the Mirna tack of throwing “o” on the end of everything. Here at the Pit Stop to help you with your Spanish is another Boston icon:


Bahstan Rawb Mariano. (Sorry you couldn't be around for this, Aiellos.)

Paolos! Did anyone ever dream that DJ and Marion would be arm in arm on that bungee jump? Guess this means you won’t be arguing anymore. (And I’m being replaced by Anderson Cooper next week.) Enjoy coming rrrright back here after the Race.

Who knew there were so many birds in Illinois? Good job, Bransens.

Team “They’ll Know We Are Christians By Our Love”: You’re not making any fast friends here, are you? Sure, this isn’t a popularity contest (see: Freddy and Kendra), but don’t look for any favors later on. In Bruckheimer’s name. Amen.

Linzes: Didn’t help that much to team up with the Godlewskis to get rid of the Weavers now, did it? You can do better. Try the Bransens next time, although pairing Wally with Megan might look a LITTLE weird.

Gaghans, you’re lucky there was only one FF on this Race! You only gave the Paolos the incentive they needed to finish. And Bill, the Orioles are on the phone; they need a DH next year in place of Raffy and/or Sammy. Please pee into this cup.

Smut Sisters, way to show America your entire wardrobe. Nice underwear especially. That’ll tick the ratings up a couple notches! Or not. Enjoy flaunting yourselves for money next week.

There's still time to play. Just sign up in the signup thread, in which you'll find the rules. Many new posters are taking part, so don’t be bashful!

So far, the following Racers remain available:
WEAVER: Rebecca
LINZ: Alex, Nick
BRANSEN: Elizabeth, Lindsay
GODLEWSKI: Michelle

All members of the PAOLO and GAGHAN families are taken.

PHILIMINATED: Rogers, Black, Aiello, Schroeder. Players in these families may post from Sequesterville, wherever it is. Or you may ask for a new, unclaimed Racer.

ALSO AVAILABLE, if anyone is so interested: Executive Producers Bruck (Jerry Bruckheimer) and Bertram Van Munster. I’ve been posting as them, but I’ll happily let someone else take their personae.

You may also participate without signing up by posting as a non-Racer, e.g. a boat driver, a musician, the bird watcher guy, a baseball player, a cameraperson or sound tech, or others. Or even as yourself, addressing the Racers. Be creative!

Remember: this is NOT a discussion thread, but a role-playing one. Thank you.

ETA: Per Bebo's post below, please resist the urge to post as your character in other discussion threads. I admit I've done that in previous iterations of this game, but she has a good point; it has kind of run amok here. Thanks again.

Have fun!


Table of contents
Messages in this discussion
"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by beau_30 on 10-26-05 at 01:28 AM
After you hit that home room dad, we got back in the lead. I think we would of caught up and made higher timing if we didnt get stuck by that roadblock.
To bad the Godlewski bus wasn't next to us. That would of been a sight to see wouldn't it.
I saw rolly in the bathroom a few minutes ago banging up against the wall, i don't wanna know what he is doing.
Hey phil did you see dad hit that ball, could you hit like that.
Hey Godlewski next time rember this is a "Family" addition race.
But the more naked you are, the better the ratings go. Now what about you megan.

"Its the most daring competition every attempted."

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by bystander on 10-26-05 at 09:13 AM
I saw rolly in the bathroom a few minutes ago banging up against the wall, i don't wanna know what he is doing.

You're just a dorky little kid. If you were a real man like me you'd know what I was up to. Maybe I'll show you later.

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by gofrank151 on 10-26-05 at 02:42 PM
LMAO.
"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by cahaya on 10-26-05 at 12:26 PM
*kicking dirt at the plate*

*swing* *bash* Easy home run!

Thanks, son!

I kinda wished I had that bat earlier to bop the boat driver one.


"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by dragonflies on 10-26-05 at 02:46 PM
My daddy is the bestest! I'm glad that wasn't me or Billy. I just woke up from a nap.


"Report from the Roadblock pitcher"
Posted by Ryan DeMaster on 10-26-05 at 01:50 AM
Mi brazo es muerto. MUERTO, le digo, especialmente después de que tuve que lanzar alrededor de cientos echadas a esa una señora. ¿Y entonces, fuera de todo el eso, el mejor que ella podría hacer era un pequeño golpeador delante de la placa? ¡No pienso que podría golpear ese malo si intenté! Aposté que la pequeña muchacha habría podido golpear mejor que eso.

Y despida a mis compañeros de equipo: somos solamente cabritos, y no deseamos tener que allí esperar todo el dia a algunos de esos payasos para conseguir una base para golpear. ¿Bien?


OOC: Or, for those of you that don't speak Spanish like me (I used Babelfish), here it is in English:

My arm is dead. DEAD, I tell you, especially after I had to throw about 100 pitches to that one lady (the Godlewski). And then, out of all of that, the best she could do was a little tapper in front of the plate? I don’t think I could hit that bad if I tried! Cripes, I bet that little girl (Carissa) could have hit better than that.

And hey, lay off my teammates: we’re only kids, and we didn’t want to have to be there all day waiting for some of those clowns to get a base hit. Alright?

"RE: Report from the Roadblock pitcher"
Posted by Cygnus X1 on 10-26-05 at 08:39 AM
LAST EDITED ON 10-26-05 AT 08:41 AM (EST)

Here, have some Gatorade, Ben-Gay, and an ice pack for your elbow.

(ETA: Now we know what became of Danny Almonte.)


And welcome to the boards and the game! Great first post.

"RE: Report from the Roadblock pitcher"
Posted by cahaya on 10-26-05 at 12:27 PM
You'd make about a 100 ERA pitcher, except against any of the Godlewskis with an ERA of close to 0.00.


"RE: Report from the Roadblock pitcher"
Posted by zipperhead on 10-26-05 at 06:14 PM
Come over here and I'll show you what I can do with a bat.


"FIRST PLACE!"
Posted by Seana on 10-26-05 at 08:16 AM
Ha! And double Ha! Did I say we'd be first this week? Yes, I did. And I was right. You should have listened to me.

Did you all see my boy DJ? Lookit how good he did on that Fast Forward. That bungee jump was awesome. He did it for me, you know. To show how he loves me. My boys both love me. And Tony too. He called me "baby". You all heard. Everyone heard!

*puts on big foam finger*

We're # 1! We're #1!

I don't even mind being wrong about not getting a prize.


Welcome, Ryan!

"RE: FIRST PLACE!"
Posted by warp_core breach on 10-26-05 at 11:02 AM
(*screams like a girl*)

I love you Ma!

(*big smooch*)

Now where'd you put the info! You're supposed to have the info with you you old broad!

And to that Godlewski - the one with the double Ds, don't get on my case and don't smack me. That privilege is reserved for my old Ma! You got that?!


"RE: FIRST PLACE!"
Posted by zipperhead on 10-26-05 at 06:16 PM
*whack*

What are you gonna do about it?


punk

"RE: FIRST PLACE!"
Posted by warp_core breach on 10-28-05 at 09:56 AM
>*whack*
>
>What are you gonna do about
>it?
>

Steal that putrid pink shirt of yours and lock you up in a bathroom stall at the pit stop with those annoying broads you call your sistas.

How do you put up with the Christine broad? I thought I had it bad...


"RE: FIRST PLACE!"
Posted by Cygnus X1 on 10-29-05 at 12:48 PM
Tell Mama you love her, DJ!

Oh, wait . . . you actually *did* that.

--(Mary) Adam, TAR 6

"RE: FIRST PLACE!"
Posted by DonnaLynn on 10-26-05 at 01:57 PM
>Ha! And double Ha!
>Did I say we'd be
>first this week? Yes,
>I did. And I
>was right. You should
>have listened to me.
>
>Did you all see my boy
>DJ? Lookit how good
>he did on that Fast
>Forward. That bungee jump
>was awesome. He did
>it for me, you know.
> To show how he
>loves me. My boys
>both love me. And
>Tony too. He called
>me "baby". You all
>heard. Everyone heard!
>
>*puts on big foam finger*
>
>We're # 1! We're #1!
>
>
>I don't even mind being wrong
>about not getting a prize.
>
>
>
>


MA! Who says I love you? I don't remember saying that! Why do you think I jumped with dad? I couldn't imagine having to *GASP* actually touch you!

I will admit we kicked butt! If only I could find a way to lose the parents me and DJ would be set!!!
>


"RE: FIRST PLACE!"
Posted by Seana on 10-26-05 at 02:13 PM
Shut up.

*smack*


"RE: FIRST PLACE!"
Posted by DonnaLynn on 10-26-05 at 04:15 PM
>Shut up.
>
>*smack*
>
>

MA, shut your pie hole! You are aggrivating!


"RE: FIRST PLACE!"
Posted by warp_core breach on 10-28-05 at 09:51 AM
Yo, Brian!

*smack*

Don't talk that way to our Ma! I love her...

"RE: FIRST PLACE!"
Posted by CouchTater on 10-26-05 at 07:53 PM
>
>I will admit we kicked butt!
> If only I could
>find a way to lose
>the parents me and DJ
>would be set!!!
>>

Oh, what are you tawkin Brian? I heard you. You said that you were not ashamed to tell people I was a garbage collector. dat means dat you love me. You know you want to hang out wid us. You were hangin on to me for dear life during that bungee jump, which I did by the way for the BOYS OF THE BRONX EAST 10th BABY!

I was hugging you and gave you a kiss and said I love you. You know you love that male bonding stuff. You were smiling and all. You and me, we’re a lot alike. We don’t say nothin. We just grab people and hug them. Now go hug your mother and tell her you love her. Did you see how she was cryin and all? She's gonna really flip if no one tells her dat. You think she's been flippin so far, dat's nothin.


"RE: FIRST PLACE!"
Posted by Max Headroom on 10-26-05 at 02:02 PM
All right, enough bragging. After consecutive first-place finishes, we decided to give someone else a chance. After all, why would we want a trip to Panama when we're already here?

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by zipperhead on 10-26-05 at 08:58 AM
I'll be back to post something funny later. I still have a couple of pairs of underwear wedged up there that just aren't coming out.


I'm tempted to let that Weaver brat help me because I'm so desperate to get them out. Ouchie.

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by Cygnus X1 on 10-26-05 at 09:08 AM
Just start taking the clothes off, and I'll tell you when to stop.


Shamelessly swiped from Estee.

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by zipperhead on 10-26-05 at 06:21 PM
Never mind. I just clenched my vise-like ass even tighter and the damned things just snapped.


"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by bystander on 10-26-05 at 09:16 AM
You called???

Where do you want my hands. I know that you know that I know how to handle a bat. Wanna touch my Louisville Slugger?

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by Lisa0116 on 10-26-05 at 10:22 AM
<<rolleyes>>

You wish someone wanted to handle that spooge covered slugger of yours.



"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by bystander on 10-26-05 at 10:27 AM
Too bad we couldn't enjoy that In.Flight.Movie together. Maybe on the way out of Panama.

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by Lisa0116 on 10-26-05 at 10:29 AM
LAST EDITED ON 10-26-05 AT 10:29 AM (EST)

>Too bad we couldn't enjoy that
>In.Flight.Movie together. Maybe on
>the way out of Panama.


Did Jesus tell you to say that??



"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by bystander on 10-26-05 at 10:33 AM
I'm a man and I think for myself Meggie. I thougth you would have noticed my machismo by now.

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by HistoryDetective on 10-26-05 at 11:18 AM
You wish someone wanted to handle that spooge covered slugger of yours.

You have a filthy mouth, Megan!

It was nice of your team to carry around all of those musical instruments for me and my henhouse sisters. Remember how we promised that we would make out with your team to repay the favor? My sisters can have your brothers. I'll be waiting for you.

I like a woman with a filthy mouth.

Gabble, gabble, BAWK!!!

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by LibraRising on 10-26-05 at 12:41 PM
Should I be offended because this is lesbianism or bestiality?


I have to know which chapter of Leviticus to quote to you. Don't you see?

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by HistoryDetective on 10-26-05 at 01:19 PM
LAST EDITED ON 10-26-05 AT 01:22 PM (EST)

Surprise, surprise, surprise hearing from you. I bet if I looked up "hen-pecked" in the dictionary I would find a picture of your departed hubby. I don't blame him for stepping in front of that racecar.


edited to fix siggie

Bawk, bawk, bawk. Cluck you!

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by Lisa0116 on 10-26-05 at 04:08 PM
Eat my shorts Christine!!



"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by LibraRising on 10-26-05 at 04:26 PM
Sweetie, I think she's more interested in what's underneath them.


Goooood night, everybody!

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by zipperhead on 10-26-05 at 06:28 PM
Hey Rolly -

*flashes oobies*

Now you'll be rubbing your bat with pine tar for a couple of hours and my sisters and I can get ahead of you while your mama prays over your writhing body.



I love having oobies.

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by Lisa0116 on 10-26-05 at 10:31 AM
>I'll be back to post something
>funny later. I still have
>a couple of pairs of
>underwear wedged up there that
>just aren't coming out.
>
>
>I'm tempted to let that
>Weaver brat help me because
>I'm so desperate to get
>them out. Ouchie.


Well now-the Jesus freak might get his little virgin eyes burned helping you take out your wedgie. Got undies???


"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by LibraRising on 10-26-05 at 12:37 PM
LAST EDITED ON 10-26-05 AT 12:38 PM (EST)

Phil, you need to listen to the lyrics of the song again.

We are one in the spirit, we are one in the Lord (x3)
And they'll know we are Christians by our love, by our love, and they'll know we are Christians by our love.

Note the vague "we." It means my family and me. Not the godless, butt-flashing, gas-passing, anti-Christian heathens surrounding us. What does the Bible say about being unequally yoked, hmmm?

They're just jealous. Every last one of them. We came in second. And God helped us find that guy in the Smithsonian place. He also caused the car blocking the child-exploiting Gaghans. We'd asked to snap that bungee cord while the eye-talians were on it, but he was a little busy at that point.

Way to go, Paolos. You won a trip to the place where you already were. That's kind of like how those old Nickelodeon game shows used to give out trips to Nickelodeon Studios -- where the game show was taped. Yippee!

(etf: wrong sig...oops! I don't think it makes much sense for Brandon to be stopping by here)


Now, Rolly. How on earth did you ever learn a term like "pimp?"

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by bystander on 10-26-05 at 01:26 PM
Now, Rolly. How on earth did you ever learn a term like "pimp?"

The first member of my Posse, Hunter Schroeder filled me in about pimps. He showed me how to roll...uh....shoot...spit wads (yeah spitwads)...at that b!tch....uh....doodie-head (yeah doodie-head)...of a mother...uh...I mean....sister..of his. He said his sister was a pimpless-ho from the big N-O. That means she isn't cool. Anyway, he said Pimp was just a figure of speach, kinda like "High-Five". Sayin the ride was "Pimp" means it is all A-OK of coolness.


Yeah, its my mom and she believes anything I tell her.

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by Fred Weasley on 10-26-05 at 02:22 PM

>Now, Rolly. How on
>earth did you ever learn
>a term like "pimp?"

Jebus, Rolly, you are spiling the beans. Mom is getting suspicious about your sideline. Without Dad's income and the lawsuit not yet settled, we have had to make pin money on the side. Just like Tamar.
Boy, how did you like those trailers last week. Better than our own home.

Those wicked ungodly Linzes, yelling like that. We never do that in the Christian league. We aren't competitive but encouraging. Of course, everyone else is just plain rude. And just look at those brazen hussies, Bransen and Godlewski. Shaking their booties, and stripping without getting paid for it. The good Lord must be ashamed with "god" in Godlewski's


Just because I wear Daisy Dukes flipflops live in a trailer and have a working relationship with my brother, don't make me white trash

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by dragonflies on 10-26-05 at 02:59 PM
I was SO excited to be leaving the United States. Where is Panama anyway, Europe? Rolly, do you know?

We REALLLLLLY wanted to do that bungee thingy. Well, Billy did. I was scared, but if my daddy holds me I would've done it. *sticking tongue out* Didn't you see us Phil, after those rude boys and their parents did the fastforward? We did it too! It was waaaaaayyyyy fun!

And did you see me running again! Even my mommy and daddy were proud of me running so fast. It wasn't a marathon though.


"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by bystander on 10-26-05 at 03:02 PM
Uhhh, how dumb can you be. Panama is NOT in Europe. It's in Mexico. The Panama Canal crosses Mexico and joins Africa to California. Geeze, maybe you should stop running so much and go to school. My mom teaches school you know. That's where I learn most of my stuff from.

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by dragonflies on 10-26-05 at 06:16 PM
WAAAAAA! Mommy, Daddy, he called me dumb!


"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by LibraRising on 10-27-05 at 03:13 PM
Grow up, kid. He was trying to be encouraging.


And don't say the "D" word around my kids. It upsets them.

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by DonnaLynn on 10-27-05 at 02:52 PM
>Uhhh, how dumb can you be.
> Panama is NOT in
>Europe. It's in Mexico.
> The Panama Canal crosses
>Mexico and joins Africa to
>California. Geeze, maybe
>you should stop running so
>much and go to school.
> My mom teaches school
>you know. That's where
>I learn most of my
>stuff from.
>
>

I'll bet your ma also taught you that Lake Ponchtrain is one of the Great Lakes too huh???

Since all my MA does is yell I don't listen to her. Maybe you should do the same.


"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by bystander on 10-27-05 at 03:11 PM
LAST EDITED ON 10-27-05 AT 03:15 PM (EST)

Hey Brian. Since my bud Hunter isn't around anymore, how'd you like to join my Posse!? Ricardo Diaz hooked me up with some b!tchin (No not Hunter's Mom) Panama weed and I'd love to share it with you. Wait till our Mom's are asleep and meet me by the dumpster back behind Motel-Seis.

I have a feeling Meggie will be by also. She has the hots for me dude.

"Please keep the game in designated threads"
Posted by Bebo on 10-26-05 at 10:30 PM
Folks, it's great that you're enjoying your game, but please show consideration to your fellow posters who aren't playing the game and confine your game persona comments to the designated game threads.

For folks who aren't playing, your posts can be distracting and can be disruptive to the discussions.

Thanks in advance for showing consideration to your fellow posters.

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by universityofkentuckyrocks on 10-27-05 at 06:18 PM
My siblings and I are dominating, no one is as good as us. The rest of you can't keep up with college students!

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by bostonrobfan on 10-27-05 at 09:21 PM
My bro hablos the truth.



"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by Lisa0116 on 10-28-05 at 11:09 AM
Yeah, what they said!!!

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by Ryan DeMaster on 10-28-05 at 11:30 AM
>My siblings and I are dominating,
>no one is as good
>as us. The rest of
>you can't keep up with
>college students!
>
>

As kickass as college students are (I should know, being one myself), I couldn't help but wonder: if you're "dominating" and "the rest of {them} can't keep up", then how are you currently in FOURTH PLACE?

*runs*

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by HistoryDetective on 10-28-05 at 11:34 AM
BAWK! I'm proud that the other hens and I weren't so scatterbrained that we didn't put on all our clothes before going to the mat, but why, oh, why didn't any of us think far enough ahead to slip some makeup into our pockets. You don't wanna see what Sharon looks like before she gets prettied up.

Besides, it looks like one of us needs to lend Rolly some concealer for that gaint gaping bloody zit in the center of his forehead.

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by zipperhead on 10-28-05 at 05:34 PM
You don't wanna see what Sharon looks like before she gets prettied up.

Oh, what do you know? You were wearing a freakin' net over your head at the pit stop. Unless you think Phil is into bondage, then you looked worse than any of us.

Besides, with my shape I don't have to be so cute. You wouldn't know anything about that since you never made it all the way through puberty.


"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by bystander on 10-31-05 at 02:06 PM
For your information Henny Penny, it is not a "giant gaping bloody zit". It is a sign from the almighty above. My mother prayed for us to move up from 5th place so we could distance ourselves from those Gaghan brats. As a result, "the Beacon" appeared on my forehead. "The Beacon" was shining like a light through the dark and showed us the way through this strange continent of Panama and helped us achieve our 2nd Place finish.


Or maybe I drink too many of my moms Magic Milkshakes.

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by byoffer on 10-31-05 at 02:39 PM
I blew up a picture and I think I figured it out...


For the record, that thread was off-the-charts funny. I understand where Bebo was coming from, but it was funny.


"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by bystander on 10-31-05 at 02:50 PM
That explains alot. Now I know where that little voice inside my head was coming from! Kenzie is my Beacon!


Anyone wanna squeeze my beacon?....hmmm, that doesn't sound quite right.

"RE: Be The Amazing Racer Family Edition (BARFE) - Episode 5"
Posted by byoffer on 10-31-05 at 02:59 PM
My guess is that Bebo "squeezed" your beacon after post #77 in the Jesus thread, cause all of the abuse (and mis-spelling) suddenly disappeared. Amazing the forest-fire that you started with post #4 on that thread!


Anyone (other than Kenzie) want to sign up as the Zit in BARFE??