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Original Message
"Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 "

Posted by buckeyegirl on 02-27-06 at 11:53 PM
LAST EDITED ON 02-28-06 AT 11:12 AM (EST)

Is it midnight yet on the East coast? I think it's close enough to post this so it's up in time tomorrow morning, but just in case you haven't watched tonights episode yet here is some space filler...


Welcome to week one of the Be The Apprentice game...for those of you who are new, this is a role playing game, and not a discussion thread. If you'd like to sign up to be a character (we have plenty of characters still open) please sign up here

Change The Teams was our trumpism for the night...and true to the word, he changed a few things up, starting with our intro. We started off with the traditional shots of the candidates arriving, but if you haven't figured it out by now, they're really just token shots of the few poor souls who didn't get the email saying everyone was meeting at LaGuardia, so EPMB really had to stretch the cinematography this season...in a new twist we actually showed the candidates introducing themselves. All I caught was Mensa, Harvard MBA, Cornell University, yadda, yadda yadda, yawn....Then taking a page out of the Survivor handbook Trump had the two "smartest" players pick their own teams. Tarek may be a member of Mensa, but sweetie, those Brooke Shields eyebrows went out in the 80s.

Tonights task? To sell the most Sam's Club membership by using a Goodyear Blimp. This way we kill two advertisements at once instead of streching them out all season long....

Synergy
Good call on coming up with such a creative plan-manicures and massages, lord knows that grocery shopping stresses everyone out..
Brent, honey-no one really believed you when said being picked last didn't bother you, and since the dude with British accent dogged on you first, you know you'll be around awhile, so you have nothing to worry about....

Sean- I luv, luv,luv your accent, you could sell me a hundred Sam's club memberships....

Allie-Your Harvard accent is driving me nuts...you may have won this task, but I have a feeling it had more to do with your team members then you being PM.

Did we see anyone else on the team? Pepi, Rebecca were you even there?



Gold Rush

Tarek-what in the heck were you thinking? A free freakin' gym bag? and complimentary...could you see my eyes rolling when I talked to you? Luckily for you, Theresa, Lee (or was it lenny?) and what's her name were selling fools....

Summer, sweetie-why couldn't you make a few phone calls? Plans, schams, you don't need em'. How do you think I turned around my golf course so fast--it was smooth talking all the way...and you made the mistake of having a witness there while you blew the phone calls. Not good for when you go to the boardroom...

Lenny or is it Lee?-loved the business consultant suit idea...but sweetie, Summer is way outta your league, so you can forget about defending her....

The Boardroom

No creative process at all...
Theresa-can we say Brown noser? Way to suck up to Tarek during the boardroom....
Charamine, I forgot you on the team before Donald asked you that question and you blamed Summer for the lost...

Lenny/Lee I can't keep track of who is who...if you hadn't questioned Mr. Brooke Shields, then you probably wouldn't have gone to the boardroom....To the New Yorker/Russian half of the duo-your accent may not be as good as Sean's but you did show some spunk in the boardroom...

Summer, Summer, Summer, Summer, where do I begin? What were you thinking interupting the Donald? You silly, silly blonde....you totally devasted Lee/Lenny's night by not having Tarek get fired...and totally deserved to get the axe...


Mensa, Schimsa, we all know I'm the smhartest one on this show...


Table of contents
  • Stupid Americans,CattyChat, 07:07 AM, 02-28-06
  • RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 ,Angelfood, 10:18 AM, 02-28-06
    • RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 ,buckeyegirl, 11:08 AM, 02-28-06
      • RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 ,DooWahDitty, 11:36 AM, 02-28-06
    • RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 ,CantStandToLook, 05:53 PM, 02-28-06
    • Oh, Mr. Trump?,Sahara, 07:52 PM, 02-28-06
      • that depends...,Angelfood, 08:46 PM, 02-28-06
        • We had best be careful...,Sahara, 02:23 PM, 03-01-06
          • RE: We had best be careful...,DooWahDitty, 02:34 PM, 03-01-06
    • RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 ,pines6217, 10:57 PM, 03-02-06
  • RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 ,Hoobie, 01:24 PM, 02-28-06
  • RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 ,Sahara, 07:48 PM, 02-28-06
    • RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 ,CattyChat, 11:00 AM, 03-01-06
      • RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 ,Sahara, 02:13 PM, 03-01-06
      • RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 ,buckeyegirl, 05:29 PM, 03-02-06
        • RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 ,CantStandToLook, 10:24 AM, 03-04-06
  • Let me Introduce Myself . . . ,CattyChat, 10:51 AM, 03-01-06
    • RE: Let me Introduce Myself . . . ,DooWahDitty, 12:27 PM, 03-01-06
    • RE: Let me Introduce Myself . . . ,Sahara, 02:01 PM, 03-01-06
  • RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 ,Scuba Steve, 12:45 PM, 03-03-06
    • RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 ,buckeyegirl, 03:17 PM, 03-05-06

Messages in this discussion
"Stupid Americans"
Posted by CattyChat on 02-28-06 at 07:07 AM
Summer, I say you "keep mouth shut in boardroom" and what you do? You no keep mouth shut and you fired. Peoples need listen to Lenny, as I know how to cover a$$e$. I sorry see you go, you strong, beautiful woman we in Russia love.

As for you, Tarek. I no not this word "Mensa" but in Russia we call peoples like you, fool. You not smart and you haves big mouths. It not over with me and you. I am to get you fired, you stupid littles man. If not for me, you not find Sam's. If not for me, you's blimp would be in Siberia. You not mess with me, I have peoples I can call to make you's disappear.

It is time for me to kicks some a$$es. I watch you, Tarek. . .


Picks me last?? Do I frightens you Americans???


"RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 "
Posted by Angelfood on 02-28-06 at 10:18 AM
Yes, Carolyn You are the smartest one on the show.

What in carnations was that remark at the end -
It was obvious WAY EARLIER that Summer was the ... obvious choice. ????

Are you saying you know better than me?

You are SOOO Smart, miss smarty-pants, that you should take a vacation next week and think about exactly HOW smart you are. I'll replace you with my beautiful and business-savvy daughter, Ivanka.

(Or is that George that's out next week?)

Summer - nothing I hate more than
1. anyone who interrupts the Donald - didn't you see other seasons of this show?
2. a greedy, bossy, stupid blonde - got rid of 2 wives already and I have issues with this


I've decided that I can still be Donald without watching the show. I'll miss the tasks and sometimes, I'll watch the Boardroom and sometimes I'll just jump in and ask y'all questions about what happened and yell at whoever makes me mad. Just like DT!


"RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 "
Posted by buckeyegirl on 02-28-06 at 11:08 AM
LAST EDITED ON 02-28-06 AT 11:12 AM (EST)

But Donald, she was the obvious choice...I mean, really it was obvious that this California girl didn't have an ounce of smarts, how she got past the casting people is beyond me, but then again, you are way smarter then me-you did go to Wharton after all, so who am I to judge your candidate picks?? I could use some vacation time to spend some time with the kids, but please don't replace me with Kendra... ::shudder::


Now Donald, I may be smharter then Tarek, but no one is as smhart as you...


"RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 "
Posted by DooWahDitty on 02-28-06 at 11:36 AM
...really it was obvious that this California girl didn't have an ounce of smarts, how she got past the casting people is beyond me

Coulda told you that from the beginning, Carolyn. sigh. I really thought she'd at least do we California girls proud for at least a couple weeks. *pout*

Well, back to business. And believe me, I'm all about business. Stay tuned!



"RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 "
Posted by CantStandToLook on 02-28-06 at 05:53 PM
Hey Boss...thanks for at least letting me attend the premier before sending me outta town. I'm getting an agism vibe here

I have one thing to say to our Mensa Genius, Book Smarts does not equal Smart. Can I please have my empty gift bag now?

That's right , you're fired..get out already


"Oh, Mr. Trump?"
Posted by Sahara on 02-28-06 at 07:52 PM
LAST EDITED ON 02-28-06 AT 07:54 PM (EST)

I think I may have something to help you from my Wellness Center. Perhaps a bit of the herb cascara sagrada would help you with that constipation problem (I suppose that is what causes that ugly red-faced forehead-squenching scowl). Would you like to try some?

ETA a descriptive adjective


"that depends..."
Posted by Angelfood on 02-28-06 at 08:46 PM
on if it would have any adverse reactions to my Rogain and Viagra.


"We had best be careful..."
Posted by Sahara on 03-01-06 at 02:23 PM
and start very slowly, as I fear you have been constipated so long that detoxifying from that may throw your whole body off, which could possibly switch the effects of the two drugs. Your you-know-what could begin to grow hair, and your hair could become quite alert...


Analyze this, Mr. Trump!


"RE: We had best be careful..."
Posted by DooWahDitty on 03-01-06 at 02:34 PM
You know Theresa, after this pathetic debacle is over, you and I could team up and do quite well don't you think? Business only, of course! None of that trendy hanky-panky for this classy woman. I've got waaaaay better things to do with my time.


that is, of course, if you'd like me to try and get combover to hire you as one of my minions during the year-long contract.


"RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 "
Posted by pines6217 on 03-02-06 at 10:57 PM
Donald's remark about Summer saving Tarek's behind does not quite cut it for me anymore, especially when in the last season the Donald has executed several double-firings and even fired four in one show. If Donald felt Tarek was so overated and incompetent, then how about firing BOTH Tarek and Summer??

"RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 "
Posted by Hoobie on 02-28-06 at 01:24 PM
Summer - I really appreciate you understanding that 5pm is the dinner hour. Not many people would know that, in fact I think that that Mensa member could really learn a lot about what time of day people eat at restaurants from someone like you. By the by, WHY does he have to repeat that he is a member of Mensa over and over? He's really annoying the crap out of me - just call me tomorrow, when he's out of earshot.

--The anonymous "restaurant owner" on the other end of Summer's phone line.


"RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 "
Posted by Sahara on 02-28-06 at 07:48 PM
Well, I successfully made it through the first task. I spent much time studying the psyches of my teammates to determine what made them tick. Summer seems to have issues with authority (not to mention no common sense). I sense that she had a crotchety male teacher with a comb-over in the fourth grade (such an important year in the developmental stages) who gave her assignment after assignment and did not reward her with any praise. Thus, she strikes out at every male who tries to tell her what to do.

And Tarek, the Mensa idiot, has such low self-esteem he must boost himself again and again by reminding himself and everyone else what his I.Q. is. (We certainly would have never guessed it if he had not told us!) I knew the way into his good graces was flattery, flattery, flattery.



"RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 "
Posted by CattyChat on 03-01-06 at 11:00 AM
Theresa, my name is Lenny. I was powerful mans in my homeland of Russia. I see you a strong, beautiful womans. I like have alliances with you. We have a fools by name of Tarek and he need to leaves. He is bad for our teams.

I say to you that I believes Mr. Trumps respect my power. He agree with my thoughts of Tarek. I say to Mr. Trumps I am ready to kick many aces and win.


Russkis do it better


"RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 "
Posted by Sahara on 03-01-06 at 02:13 PM
Hello, Lenny. I will have to study carefully to see with whom it would be best to have a fling with have an alliance. Yes, Tarek is a fool and should not have sent you to Siberia with the girl who was being punished for only making one phone call. I am sure that made you feel isolated and worthless, didn't it? I sense much hostility toward this Tarek person. Does he remind you of your drunk and abusive Russian father, perhaps? Did he often send you away?

I am all for kicking aces. And I am so flattered that you noticed my natural beauty and strength.


Analyze this, Mr. Trump!


"RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 "
Posted by buckeyegirl on 03-02-06 at 05:29 PM
Enough about Mr. Trump respecting you...we all know that it's my opinion that counts around here...who do you think writes what Trump says at those boardroom meetings? The writers? George? Get real...

Did I mention how much I love working for you Mr. Trump?


"RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 "
Posted by CantStandToLook on 03-04-06 at 10:24 AM
Funny Caroline I guess that's why hes sending both of us out of town next week. Fear my wrath my young padawan.



That's right , you're fired..get out already


"Let me Introduce Myself . . . "
Posted by CattyChat on 03-01-06 at 10:51 AM
Hi teammates, my name is Pepi. People call me Pepi. Okay, I'm going back to UTR status now.

BTW - Our team leader is smokin' -- *runs & hides*


"Speedy is my middle name"


"RE: Let me Introduce Myself . . . "
Posted by DooWahDitty on 03-01-06 at 12:27 PM
*ahem* That may be the way past winners have achieved their status, Tar-baby, but it isn't going to work this time. With all my various business dealings and my completely full private life, I cannot afford to fly under the radar. Yes little Pepi, you are going to have your hands full just dealing with me. Business isn't only about looks and club memberships.


*ahhhhhh* this camel pose feel so groood.... oh, secretary? How's my next dog adoption coming? I can't wait to my puppies along on my year-long ride with The Donald.


"RE: Let me Introduce Myself . . . "
Posted by Sahara on 03-01-06 at 02:01 PM
Hello, Pepi. I am so glad you introduced yourself. I do have a question...were you on my team?

I am so sorry if this causes you to feel insignificant (which you are).



"RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 "
Posted by Scuba Steve on 03-03-06 at 12:45 PM
May I just say that giving away a duffel bag of nothing was a great idea? The rest of my team just didn't understand it. They can't comprehend with my Mensa genuis.

Lee, how could you stab me in the back like that? I'm going to make sure you get fired next, you non-Mensa.

Summer, I knew right away you would never be in Mensa. Why? Because you're an idiot. You're such a idiot that you got fired, and I'm still around. Ha!

Tarek

BTW, did I mention I'm in Mensa?


"RE: Mensa, Schmisa, BTA Game, week 1 "
Posted by buckeyegirl on 03-05-06 at 03:17 PM
LAST EDITED ON 03-05-06 AT 03:17 PM (EST)

*shakes head* Tarek, Tarek, Tarek....what on earth were you thinking? A gift bag with no gifts? You didn't even make people sign up for a membership before giving them one...here I thought people in Mensa were supposed to be smart...



You didn't read my book did you? It gave some great tips for Apprentice Candidates...