When me prayers were poorly said
Who tucked me in me widdle bed
And spanked me till me arse was red,
Me Mudder!

Who took me from me cozy cot
And put me on the ice cold pot
And made me pee when I could not,
Me Mudder!

And when the morning light would come
And in me crib me dribbled some
Who wiped me tiny widdle bum,
Me Mudder!

Who would me hair so neatly part
And hug me gently to her heart
Who sometimes squeezed me till me fart,
Me Mudder!

Who looked at me with eyebrows knit
And nearly have a king size fit
When in me Sunday pants me s#@%
Me Mudder!

When at night her bed did squeak
Me raised me head to have a peak
Who yelled at me to go to sleep,
Me Fadder!

Disclaimer: I did not write it. I'm just passing it on.