As a follower of the great Lucian, I have created an alternate history of Survivor as well. It gives us all something to do between now and Super Bowl Sunday. So here goes...

Everybody knows that in comparison, Pagong tribe younger and more athletic and Tagi was more wise and mature. But what if CBS had exaggerated that a little more? What difference would it have made? We'll see.

Episode 1: We didn't start the fire

(This one won't be very good as I haven't actually seen the episode, so expect a few things that don't add up)

We meet the 16 contestants. We find out that they will be divided into two different tribes, Pagong and Tagi. Let's meet them...

Tagi Tribe

B.B. Andersen, 64 years old
Ramona Grey, 28 years old (switched to keep male/female even)
Gretchen Cordy, 38 years old
Rudy Boesch, 72 years old
Richard Hatch, 38 years old
Sonja Christopher, 62 years old
Susan Hawk, 38 years old
Gervase Peterson, 30 years old

Pagong Tribe

Colleen Haskell, 23 years old
Jenna Lewis, 22 years old
Kelly Wiglesworth, 22 years old
Greg Buis, 27 years old
Sean Kenniff, 30 years old (switched with Ramona)
Dirk Been, 23 years old
Joel Klug, 27 years old
Stacey Stillman, 27 years old

Jeff Probst, our beloved host, informs everyone that they have two minutes to salvage whatever they can before jumping ship. They must then raft to shore and set up a camp.

Tagi hits shore first, but not before Ramona and Gretchen get nauseous. They immediately get to work, except Richard who sits in a tree. B.B. tells him to get down and help clear a campsite. He does but refuses to help. Early conflict arises. B.B. and Rudy get the site cleaned up in no time flat. Let's check on Pagong, shall we?

Pagong hits shore in no time flat. They don't bother cleaning out anything but spend a while to get to know each other. Kids.

Day 2

The tribes must get fire. Tagi does it quite easily when Gretchen uses B.B.'s glasses as a magnifying lens. Tagi also has a bathroom while Pagong has basically nothing. Greg rubs sticks together but has no luck. That night, Tagi has a hot meal while Pagong, well, doesn't.

Day 3

the tribes get ready for an immunity challenge.

Immunity Challenge: Quest for Fire

Jeff explains the rules to the survivors. Each member must keep one hand on the raft at all times. They must light a row of torches and then a fire spirit. First team to do it wins immunity and 50 waterproof matches. Pagong suddenly doesn't really care about the immunity anymore.

Survivors ready? Go!

Let's just make this short. On Tagi, Gervase can't swim. Ramona is sick. Sonja trips. On Pagong, their oldest member is 30 and among them is Kelly the river guide and the competitive Joel. This one isn't even close.

Pagong is happy. Tagi is not.

That night, Pagong, besides having Sean almost accidentally burn the immunity idol for firewood, gets a hot meal. Tagi, on the other hand, must vote off one of their own.

At tribal council, we see votes as follows.

Susan votes.
Rich votes.
B.B. votes for Ramona. "She's lazy and hasn't done anything."
Sonja votes.
Ramona votes.
Gretchen votes.
Gervase votes.
Finally, Rudy votes for B.B. "He reminds me of me on a bad day, that's fer sure. I don't wanna spend another 5 weeks with this guy."

Jeff tallys the votes.

Sonja (actually "Souna")
B.B.
Sonja
Ramona
B.B.
Sonja
B.B.
"That's three for Sonja, three for B.B. And the last vote is..."
B.B.

"B.B., you need to bring me your torch. The tribe has spoken. The rest of you can head back to camp."

End Credits:

We see the votes. Sonja, Ramona, Gretchen and Rudy voted for B.B., Rich, Susan and Gervase voted for Sonja, B.B. voted for Ramona.

Next week on Survivor: Things heat up romantically on Pagong beach and Tagi talks about the loss of B.B. Rudy says "Frankly I won't miss the guy. He's been bugging me since day one and if anyone asks, sure I'll admit to voting for him."

Stay tuned for Episode 2 of the second Survivor alternate history.