But humans do.
LAST EDITED ON 03-11-15 AT 09:11 PM (EST)One Blue Collar contestant makes everyone else hot around the collar as he proves to be the worst babysitter... in like...ever. Meanwhile, the Meeting Room Messiah group is out interviewing for the HII while Carolyn volunteers to watch the fire.
The No Collar kids have some weird things on their Survivor cafeteria trays, but it does seem like a step up from last week's live scorpion sushi bar.
Hali and Jenn play Gidget on their ghetto-fabulous boogie boards, while the "There's a hole in the bucket dear Liza, dear Liza" Challenge shows its exciting, leaky head again. Winners will receive comfort items, courtesy of the Secaucus, New Jersey Best Western Hotel (Exit 137).
Mark "Lazy, Crazy or Dysfunctional; it's all bank to me" Burnett
As lead Lizard in this trifecta of compartriots, I declare war on all humans. Let it be known that we DON'T taste like chicken.
But humans do.
What goes with lizard, white or red whine?
Bring on the carnage.
All depends on the species of the lizard.
Crab: White
Lizard: Rose
Scorpion: Red
and with nuts? A six-pack of beer.
Lizard and rose, are you mad??????? The texture of lizard skin and the full aroma of it's body leads to a red wine.
yes I'm talking out of my arse because I don't drink!
That aroma you speak of is a seasonal thing and I'd say you been gettin' some "off-season" lizard, perhaps during a molt.
The actual lizard flesh is very light in texture and taste and I'm afraid a red is just too powerful.
And sadly, I DO know what lizard tastes like. And boy oh boy, it's certainly better with a drink.
During a molt? You must be daft, everyone knows you drink Molt liquor during that time. Duh!!!!!!!!!
LAST EDITED ON 03-12-15 AT 09:13 AM (EST)Ooooh, I'm just so mad at all of you I could just scream!!
Pissy little he-girl!
With the world's worst prison tat.
(BTW, nice post, Dice)
I can't wait to see who Suzzee chooses next so I know who will get voted out. She is on a roll!
LAST EDITED ON 03-12-15 AT 10:27 AM (EST)
heh heh heh.
Whew, Dodged a bullet there but man, these challenges are killing me!
OMG, the monkey's are doin' it! Right in front of me! Oh, wow.
The Queen of TMIOh great, the next google home page cartoon is going to be a couple of oversexed monkeys. Yippie.
Bring on the carnage.
Oh Shirin, I think you're into monkeys so stopped pretending.
Have you been reading my dating profile? I don't limit myself to one species, you know >nudge nudge<.
I'm into Primates!
This sounds like a conversations I need to be in!
How do you feel about putting one of these on? >wink-wink<
I'd put one on, but it would make me too tired and I might not be able to live "up" to your expectations!
LAST EDITED ON 03-12-15 AT 02:00 PM (EST)I may not make it past the next TC, little miss kiss of bootation has cut & pasted my siggie right into the hot seat.
I'm into Primates!
LAST EDITED ON 03-12-15 AT 04:34 PM (EST)never mind, I fixed the problem.
Hey, I resemble that remark!
I may not make it past the next TC, little miss kiss of bootation has cut & pasted my siggie right into the hot seat.Ah, keep your pants on. No, really. Keep your pants on!
Surfs Up. Slippery nips and all.Coconut Bob here, broadcasting from the tree tops of my paradise island which shall remain nameless because of certain trademark infringement lawsuits and because, well, the Federales read these spoilers too, and we don’t need to give them any clues.
Anyway, we have an abundance of spoilers this week thanks to the very seductive and pleasantly naked native spy graduates of the RRR R Girls finishing school of Advanced Motor Scootering and Antique Embroidery, and their very willing undergraduate protégés who also specialize in EPMB sharp stick poking, something that may come up at a later date.
My raunchy girls, each faster than a scuttling crab, more seductive than a locomotive (hey, those can be pretty seductive in the right light), and able to climb the highest palm tree.
Up in the sky, look: They’re shooting us the bird. They are definitely not plain! They are …the Super Spoiler Girls!
Disguised as mild mannered Nymphos in order to suss out the best guarded spoiler secrets from the feral tribes on Survivor’s Worlds Apart islands, and to use their amazing powers in a never-ending battle for truth, justice, and kinky sex, the Super Spoiler Girls have assumed the disguises of Clitoris Cuent, mild-mannered Nympho servicing the metropolitan Spoiler community.
Clitoris Cuent: “Why, this looks like a job for Super Spoiler Girls, man.”Jiminey O’lizard: “Who was that masked man”
Clitoris Cuent: “Wake up you fool, you’re in the wrong comic strip.”
Jiminey O’lizard: “Tell Tonto to stop bogarting that joint, my friend.”
Anyway, enough of this pleasant banter between nobody in particular, on with the Super Spoilers:
Super Girl Spoiler #1: Nina. Displaying lots of worlds apart, or at least lots of room between the hemispheres of her brain, apparently, tries the “Hey I know I’m next, just don’t make me look stupid, OK?” strategy.
So naturally the tribe members sharpen their canines, jump up, and try to make her look as stupid as they can, first assuring her that she is just as normal as they are (that alone should give her pause) then, after she is reassured, backstabbing her and metaphorically slicing her from stem to stern, draining her blood, eating her liver, and dancing around her corpse singing “You are so stupid, to me, can’t you see? You are so stupid, to meeeeee!”
Super Girl Spoiler #2: Shirin. Monkey Shines. OK, to be fair, most people who see monkeys in the jungle, especially vocal and very un-shy monkeys like Howlers, do get excited. Most don’t wet their pants with desire for a little monkey tail, but that can be forgiven too. However, what neither the monkeys, her tribe mates, nor the public in general can forgive is that god awful monkey dance.Please, get a mirror. Practice. And comeback when you can do a routine that doesn’t elicit feces throwing from your tribe mates.
Super Girl Spoiler #3: Will. Playing chess, not checkers. However it would probably more helpful to be playing the game of Survivor, but what do I know, big guy. I will admit that playing a sit down board game is more up your alley stamina wise.
Super Girl Spoiler #4: Mike. As mentioned before, pissy little he-girl whiner with a prison tat guaranteed to make him someone’s cell bitch. I think his claim to be an Oil Rig worker is code for another kind of greasy pipe worker.
Super Girl Spoiler #5: Rod. Another pissy little he-girl whiner. Better tattoos though. But with those tats, can you really dis a girl with a facial tat? Really? Is there that kind of pecking order in the world of self-disfigurement?
Super Girl Spoiler #6: Lindsey. I’m good with those tats, because she has the wit to go with them. You see, if you have extensive tattooing, you have to have a pretty entertaining personality to go with it. And of course a hot body. And camel toes. That whole package works. Most importantly, if you do go in for body ink, you can’t be a pissy little he-girl whiner.
Super Girl Spoiler #7: Joe. A jungle full of tropical fruit, and an ocean full of fish and crabs. And you roast up a skink. A puny little lizard whose only fault was his habit of basking in the sun and being a little slower than his lizard mates.
Eat a scorpion Joe. Eat a centipede. Eat a spider. But whatever you do, don’t catch a fat crab or a fat perch, they would actually taste good. And they would be nutritious.
Super Girl Spoiler #8: Carolyn. What me worry?
Super Girl Spoiler #9: No Collar Tribe. Once again, the no collars can’t hold their water.
I'll be sending my fee for another season's subscription to the Super Spoiler updates. Price the same? You currency is in ounces still. yes? Look for the plain brown package in the usual spot. No, the other usual spot Senor. Ooops I mean Bob. Having a hard time with the aliases...On to the Coconut Commentary and Wild Rumors:
Super Girl Spoiler #1: Obviously put on the No Collars as First Boot Fodder. Gah, those airheads even messed that one up.
Super Girl Spoiler #2: I get the monkey moonlight madness but nobody should do the dishes in the buff, without a buff. Not even once. Ever.
Super Girl Spoiler #4 & #5: Nominating those two for the next Disney Princesses. A couple of beeyotchy ones for sure.
Super Girl Spoiler #7: Joe, how could you, that little green dude was our pizza delivery guy. Now you're at the top of our hit-in-the-head with a coconut list.
Bring on the carnage.
Plain brown package located at usual drop point.Had to fight off a raccoon.
Racoon Mafia, vewwy sneaky.
Bring on the carnage.
