I got Bad Gas
Tent smells like Ass
Voted Off I should be
But God he listens to Vee
John he does Sob
tried to treat me like Rob
but now my ass
smells so sweet
Sobbin' John's throat cut neat
My gas still smells bad
but I am not the one so sad
at least until next week

• RE: I Got Gas,Dianetic, 03:02 PM, 04-19-02
  • Don't get ahead of yourself...,Bebo, 04:55 PM, 04-19-02
  • Immunity Challenge,hrc2u, 09:24 PM, 04-19-02
• RE: I Got Gas,dangerkitty, 05:01 PM, 04-19-02
• RE: I Got Gas,aymelek, 05:54 PM, 04-19-02
  • Wrong?,EBug, 08:36 PM, 04-19-02
    • Proof I'm not crazy!,George Tirebiter, 10:04 PM, 04-19-02
      • RE: Proof I'm not crazy!,EBug, 01:41 AM, 04-20-02
        • RE: Proof I'm not crazy!,George Tirebiter, 01:51 AM, 04-20-02
          • RE: Proof I'm not crazy!,EBug, 02:04 AM, 04-20-02
            • shhhhh,George Tirebiter, 02:22 AM, 04-20-02
              • RE: shhhhh,EBug, 02:32 AM, 04-20-02
                • ahhhhhhh...,dabo, 02:38 AM, 04-20-02
          • RE: Proof I'm not crazy!,aymelek, 10:16 AM, 04-20-02
• Gas rap,dangerkitty, 11:45 PM, 04-19-02
  • RE: Gas rap,EBug, 01:46 AM, 04-20-02
• Happy #3000,Outfrontgirl, 03:57 AM, 04-20-02
  • RE: Happy #3000,Drive My Car, 08:32 PM, 04-21-02
    • RE: Happy #3000,George Tirebiter, 09:39 PM, 04-21-02
      • RE: Happy #3000,Drive My Car, 11:46 PM, 04-21-02
        • RE: Happy #3000,George Tirebiter, 00:34 AM, 04-22-02
      • RE: Happy #3000,Bebo, 09:18 AM, 04-22-02
• RE: I Got Gas,Dalton, 12:34 PM, 04-20-02
  • A silenter, deadlier SB board,Dianetic, 11:41 AM, 04-24-02
• RE: I Got Gas,ivoryElephant, 03:48 PM, 04-25-02

LMAO
I loved the poem but Sean is not going next week. Burnett is so amused by Sean that he's going to rig the next challenge so Sean can win.
Next IC is the farting contest. Watch and see if I'm not right.

>Next IC is the farting contest.

But the problem is that Sean made his strategy obvious too early, just like John. Everyone knows he can fart. This contest will be won by someone who can fart but has been smart enough not to show it yet.

Could it be...
- Kathy? She can pee on command, demonstrating control over her bodily functions.
- Tammy? You know her frustration at the fracturing of her alliance could have her quite...shall we say...bottled up.
- Robert? Hard to bet against a big guy from NYC when bodily functions are involved.
- Zoe? Yeah, and she said she didn't lie either.
- Neleh? Gotta watch the wide-eyed innocents.

S.O.B.

LAST EDITED ON 04-19-02 AT 09:25 PM (EST)

Dianetic I think you are right about the contest next week. I think its whoever can make the most bubbles in the water and then survive the pop who wins.

As you can see from the vidcap Robert is making the most bubbles but Sean is having a hard time breathing in the fumes from the popped ones. And clearly Robert is cheating by keeping his nose under water.

Here we have Neleh talking about beating Robert and Sean at their own game by out stinking them. And giving the IN to Pascal.

hrc2u

Great poem, Buggy! You can make art out of farts!! Love it

And as to next weeks IC being a farting contest - good points, both of you. And what if it's a "silent but deadly" rule? Sean was loud! Although apparently deadly, too. If it is a SBD, it favors the women. We know how to be stealthy so that we don't get blamed.

I got Bad Gas
Tent smells like Ass
Voted Off I should be
But God he listens to Vee
John he does Sob
tried to treat me like Rob
but now my ass
smells so sweet
Sobbin' John's throat cut neat
My gas still smells bad
but I am not the one so sad
at least until next week

Bug, this is just wrong.

What???? It was late, I was feeling creative.

**sneaks an SBD out the right cheek**

Stop looking at me!!!!

>**sneaks an SBD out the right cheek**
>
>Stop looking at me!!!!
You know, bug. . . once everything in the post-show chat died down to the point where I could make sense of the room, I realized you had passed out in a bowl of pretzels--and I was SURE I heard you rip one off, but no one would believe me. . . (ahh--I see the value of the "good girl" façade.) Now I see your subconscious was just busy at work on this masterpiece.

(Oh yes--we're apparently all going down in the hole together, this week. . . )

GT

All constants are variables. - Murphy's Twelfth Law

GT!??!? Are you saying I farted?? In the bar???
I can't believe you would accuse me of such a thing!!!!
And I totally stand beside my "good girl facade" (whatever works)

PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTT

Ummmm, that wasn't me. I swear to goodness , I only fart in my sleep, just ask my husband.

Maybe it was you!!! ( really, blaming me for your sneaky gas,that is so , so sneaky)

And though it may be old, it is often true, Smelt it, dealt it!

Gee, buggy--sorry if I insulted you, but you DID fart openly in this very thread. . . I didn't realize you were like Queen Elizabeth--do you carry your purse everywhere you go, too?

Surely you can understand my confusion--it's simply that your arse was pointed directly at the next table, and it seemed so obvious--what with the flare-up and sparks from the candle there. Took out a couple pool cues on the adjacent billiard table, too.

I don't think SDawg was there at the time. . . Too bad, cuz it's a time-honored tradition to always blame it on the dog. . .

GT

All constants are variables. - Murphy's Twelfth Law

Oh so not me!!!!
I am really very insulted.

;)

( shhhhhhhh, the good girl thing was working for me)

(your secret is safe with me)

GT

LMFAO

What have we got but nature and opportunity?
Belch!

>Surely you can understand my confusion--it's simply that your arse was
>pointed directly at the next table, and it seemed so
>obvious--what with the flare-up and sparks from the candle there.
>Took out a couple pool cues on the adjacent billiard
>table, too.

ROFLMFAO!!

I TRIED to nip this thread in the bud at the very beginning, but nooooo-OOOO-ooooooo! You guys had to open up a whole can of beans with this one!
Pffft.

I realized what was keeping me hooked on this bit, besides the obvious fact that it is a brilliant and hilarious piece of work - it's not so much poetry as RAP!! Go on, rap it!! You won't be able to get it out of your head!

Buggy, you rock, I mean, rap.

LAST EDITED ON 04-20-02 AT 01:57 AM (EST)

Yep, it was a Rap ( a sorry white girl rap )

It was sad
It was bad
but it was all I had

( heheheheheehehhehee)

Thnx Kitty for the compliments

( edited for a messed up sig)

EBug,

it's a shame about the Bad Gas. That must be why you have so few DAWs.

I noticed that DriveMyCar poster is all set to rip out her 3000th post!

She must get a lot of mileage from her premium gas...

Which is my way ass-backwards way of saying:

HAPPY #3000 Buggy!!!

AND MANY MORE!!!

THREE (Thousand) CHEERS to YOU!!!

*I really wanted to say something about getting a bad rap--
but I enjoyed your rap so the comment didn't work*

Outed by OutFrontGirl !!!!!!
Thanks OFG!!
Yep I finally made it!
And if you all look at the top of your posts, you might see that Webby has changed our DAW Levels!! ( yea SB!)

>

>And if you all look at the top of your posts, you might see
>that Webby has changed our DAW Levels!!
Holy crap! How many decades did it take those to change, anyway?

Two minor complaints: OFG (and others) have already done the "Herbal Healing Drugs" endorsement bit--that's like a step DOWN the totem pole, isn't it?

And somehow, I don't think Dalton should ever change from "Politically Incorrect Panelist" because that is soooo her! Come to think of it, that's a gig I could get into seriously, as politcal incorrectness is often my middle name. . .

Congratulations on your whoring achievement, BTW!

GT

(who NEVER thought she'd join the likes of Bozo on the LC circuit. . .)

GT, Hon, you really ought to check out OT every so often.
For my 3000th, I threw myself at Webby's feet and begged for changes (what? do I not look desperate?)
I agree that Dalton is the perfect P.I. panelist ( I only regret that I can't get there again) Don't despair, another 2000 or so posts and you can be a Centerfold again. Heheheheheehehehehe

http://community.realitytvworld.com/boards/DCForumID6/2064.shtml

Webby lists the new DAW levels on this thresd

Yes, indeedy--you DO look desperate. . . as will the rest of us be when we have the SAME lousy levels to "look forward" to!! New levels = Good; New levels to work toward = Better.

Why, oh why are most of the new names back there where we can't GET to them?! The whole point was that we have short attention spans and get SICK of the same old things.

And man--I've got Howard Stern in my future? If he asks to see me nekkid, I'm going to kick him in the frijoles. . .

Not for a million bucks, you egotistical turd!(Who'd have thought there was anything worse than having to move in with Hef. . .)

GT

>Two minor complaints: OFG (and
>others) have already done the
>"Herbal Healing Drugs" endorsement bit--that's
>like a step DOWN the
>totem pole, isn't it?

Especially since that was my DAW level before the change -- you don't want to be back associated with me.

I fart in your general direction...

S.O.B.

Loved your RAP Buggy!

Sean could use one (Rap, that is) in the mouth or any of the vast number on Peter's official list of "holes".

Wondering how funny-haha MB thinks it is for one of his contestants to shout "Get my lawyer on the phone now!"...
everytime he loses a challenge?

Possibly, Sean figuring it WAS his week to go decided to audition for future "product endorsements"!! He could do commercials for "Bean-O" and Gas-X". But if Rolaids hires him to spell R-E-L-I-E-F in fart signs....you're talking big bucks.

Dalton
PS. At least it would get him out of the LA public school system....ahhh, silver lining.

I'm very insulted by this thread and am tempted to hit the ALERT button.
Extreme flatulence is a real problem for over 23.746 million Americans. I too suffer from the horror of this condition.

I'm not asking that we not make fart jokes but can we please remember that there are people out there with mothers, fathers, nieces, nephews, and old dogs that suffer from this malady? How would you feel if you were Sean's grandmother and came to this thread? I'm sure Grandma Rectum would get the wind taken from her sails if she read this.

fffft

Bean, beans the Musical Fruit.
The more you eat, the more you toot.
The more you toot, the better you feel.
Lets have beans for EVERY meal.

PPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTTTT....

"I know I don't know you, and you're probably not what you seem, but I sure would like to find out so why don't you climb down of that TV screen"

Gina Crews, the Sole Survivor!