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"Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
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Estee 55195 desperate attention whore postings
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12-31-12, 04:42 PM (EST)
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"Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
10. The Olsen twins were just found curled up in an L.A. subway station, rocking back and forth while muttering 'It should have been ours, it all should have been ours...'

9. The grandmother-to-be has already sold the naming rights, franchise fees, merchandizing, and most of the stem cells. Purely out of love, of course. Why, when the kid turns eighteen, s/he gets a whole 0.0001%!

8. Meanwhile, North Carolina hastily unveils a Rap Marriage Amendment.

7. Ten million women just cofounded www.watchKKsfiguredie.com (It's a pay site.)

6. Now awaiting the rap wars delivering their first roll-by stroller rattle-throwing.

5. "She's the person I see most and who loves me more than anyone? So is the head of the film crew my mommy?"
"No."
"Lead makeup?"
"No."
"Script revisor"
"Sometimes."

4. Are we collectively willing to grant the apocalypse doomsayers a slight extension?

3. The womb camera will only be live for twenty minutes, but you can buy the complete nine month Blu-Ray compilation on Amazon or just sign up for streaming video!

2. "Kim, I know you're in labor right now, I'm gonna let you finish, but I've just got to tell you, I'm never gonna marry you, I don't want any of my fans to marry their own baby mommas, and I'm never giving you a dime in child support or a moment of attention to my baby! Let's have another!"

1. ...that kid is going to be so screwed up...

Is it possible to have so many megaDAW genes in one human without having them cancel out?

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  Table of Contents

  Subject     Author     Message Date     ID  
 *twitch* Snidget 12-31-12 1
   RE: *twitch* suzzee 01-02-13 15
 DAW Birth Announcements Of Our Time... Estee 12-31-12 2
 RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... kidflash212 12-31-12 3
   RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... Estee 12-31-12 5
   I believe moonbaby 12-31-12 6
       RE: I believe PepeLePew13 01-02-13 17
           RE: I believe kingfish 01-02-13 18
 RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... PepeLePew13 12-31-12 4
   RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... cahaya 01-01-13 7
       RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... Estee 01-01-13 8
           RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... cahaya 01-02-13 10
               RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... Estee 01-02-13 11
                   RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... dabo 01-02-13 12
                       RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... Estee 01-02-13 13
                       RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... kingfish 01-02-13 14
                           RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... SOAR64 01-02-13 16
 Top Reactions to the Kardashian/We... kingfish 01-02-13 9
 RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... Max Headroom 01-02-13 19
   RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... cahaya 01-03-13 20
   RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... qwertypie 01-03-13 21
   RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... Brownroach 01-03-13 22
 RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... Estee 01-05-13 23
   RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... cahaya 01-05-13 25
       RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... Estee 06-14-13 37
 Baby Shower gift kidflash212 01-05-13 24
 RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... Puffy 01-05-13 26
 RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... PepeLePew13 01-06-13 27
   RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... suzzee 01-07-13 29
 You know jbug 01-07-13 28
 Things you never knew. Estee 03-28-13 30
   RE: Things you never knew. Snidget 03-28-13 31
 Phillip already grabbed the title. Estee 03-28-13 32
 RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... Molaholic 03-28-13 33
 Kanye reported to be cheating on Ki... Estee 06-14-13 34
   RE: Kanye reported to be cheating o... cahaya 06-14-13 35
       RE: Kanye reported to be cheating o... kingfish 06-14-13 36
           RE: Kanye reported to be cheating o... Snidget 06-14-13 38
 Time for the weight loss companies ... Snidget 06-15-13 39
   RE: Time for the weight loss compan... Estee 06-15-13 40
   RE: Time for the weight loss compan... kidflash212 06-18-13 42
 Who's her daddy? Estee 06-18-13 41
   Help! moonbaby 06-18-13 43
       RE: Help! Estee 06-18-13 44
           Yipee! moonbaby 06-18-13 45
               RE: Yipee! kingfish 06-18-13 46
                   RE: Yipee! cahaya 06-18-13 47
 Baby's name is -- Estee 06-20-13 48
   RE: Baby's name is -- cahaya 06-20-13 49
   RE: Baby's name is -- Snidget 06-21-13 50
       RE: Baby's name is -- kingfish 06-21-13 51
       RE: Baby's name is -- Brownroach 06-21-13 56
   RE: Baby's name is -- tribephyl 06-21-13 52
   RE: Baby's name is -- Molaholic 06-21-13 53
       RE: Baby's name is -- cahaya 06-21-13 54
   RE: Baby's name is -- Brownroach 06-21-13 55
 RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... Puffy 06-23-13 57
   RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardas... Snidget 06-23-13 58

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Snidget 43862 desperate attention whore postings
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12-31-12, 04:51 PM (EST)
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1. "*twitch*"


I'm not cleaning the gene pool!

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suzzee 4956 desperate attention whore postings
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01-02-13, 03:10 PM (EST)
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15. "RE: *twitch*"
exactly my reaction


Coronation by Tribe

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Estee 55195 desperate attention whore postings
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12-31-12, 05:09 PM (EST)
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2. "DAW Birth Announcements Of Our Time."
What makes me sickest is that he actually said "Baby momma".

http://www.grantland.com/blog/hollywood-prospectus/post/_/id/64422/the-kimye-baby-sign-of-the-apocalypse-or-dawning-of-the-age-of-aquarius

Next up, "personal breeder".

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kidflash212 3854 desperate attention whore postings
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12-31-12, 05:16 PM (EST)
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3. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."

So the Anti-Christ will be here in nine months or so.

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Estee 55195 desperate attention whore postings
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12-31-12, 05:42 PM (EST)
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5. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
Kind of begs the question of what the Mark is going to be.

I keep picturing an anthropomorphic personification of 2012 staggering towards the exit, muttering "You think I was a hell year? You think I used every trick in the robe? Take this!"

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moonbaby 17013 desperate attention whore postings
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12-31-12, 08:27 PM (EST)
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6. "I believe"
it's spelled Anti-Khrist.
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PepeLePew13 24731 desperate attention whore postings
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01-02-13, 05:28 PM (EST)
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17. "RE: I believe"
I'm calling it the KKK baby. (KK for Kim + K for Kanye)

KKK is offensive, just like KK and K both are.

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kingfish 16088 desperate attention whore postings
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01-02-13, 05:43 PM (EST)
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18. "RE: I believe"
LAST EDITED ON 01-02-13 AT 08:53 PM (EST)

What are the odds the kid's initials won't be KKK? I mean, it's not like they have ever had image intelligence before.

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PepeLePew13 24731 desperate attention whore postings
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12-31-12, 05:21 PM (EST)
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4. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
Who?
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cahaya 18904 desperate attention whore postings
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01-01-13, 02:55 AM (EST)
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7. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
And why?

Does anyone really care?

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Estee 55195 desperate attention whore postings
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01-01-13, 10:02 AM (EST)
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8. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
Are you claiming that ten million tabloid readers don't have their priorities straight? Because those tabloids will print a story about whose priorities are straight. Or gay. But seldom bi.
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cahaya 18904 desperate attention whore postings
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01-02-13, 11:39 AM (EST)
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10. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
It's the pictures that make the tabs stand out in the supermarket aisle. This one taken just a few days ago...

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Estee 55195 desperate attention whore postings
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01-02-13, 02:39 PM (EST)
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11. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
That outfit is so hideous, I can't see paying less than eight thousand dollars for it.
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dabo 25344 desperate attention whore postings
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01-02-13, 02:55 PM (EST)
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12. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
Um, yeah, okay, it's the outfit that's hideous, mm-hmmmm.
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Estee 55195 desperate attention whore postings
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01-02-13, 03:06 PM (EST)
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13. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
'tis. Whoever did her hair and makeup (especially the hair) that night wasn't exactly rendering any favors, but as far as I'm concerned, the dress is the worst offender.
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kingfish 16088 desperate attention whore postings
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01-02-13, 03:09 PM (EST)
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14. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
Just to thrown in an incongruity, I had a high school English teacher (probably in her 50s) with a stance and lower calves like that. Add square heeled school teacher lace up shoes and black support hose and they could be twins.

Am ashamed to realize what impulses the rest of the dress would have caused. But then, high school boys are basically brainless bags of hormones.

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SOAR64 136 desperate attention whore postings
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01-02-13, 05:19 PM (EST)
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16. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
Her lower lip appears to have been stung by a bee. I hope she did not pay for injections.
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kingfish 16088 desperate attention whore postings
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01-02-13, 10:30 AM (EST)
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9. "Top Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
LAST EDITED ON 01-02-13 AT 12:21 PM (EST)

1. Once again defying common sense and the physical constraints of this reality, Obama immediately blames it on GWB.

2. Democrats (and most Republicans) are astonished to find that there is a worse fate than having Palin elected Vice President.

3. Obama realizes that having terrorists break in to the White House and feed Michelle into a wood chipper wouldn’t be the worst thing that could happen. In his inner soul he acknowledges that that doesn't even break into the top ten.

4. Mitt realizes that losing to Obama wasn’t the worst thing in the world, after all. It's actually therapeutic for him.

OK, enough with the political takes on this. At the cost of so many Biden comparisons).

5. Kingfish realizes that there might actually be something worse than this freaking flu. Might. And dying isn't one of them.

6. The Mayans are wondering “What were we worried about? End of the world? Pffft. Son of KK-K is the real mega-calamity."

7. Speaking of which, Stephen King was looking for an idea for his new book…

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Max Headroom 10028 desperate attention whore postings
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01-02-13, 11:09 PM (EST)
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19. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
Taylor Swift should've interrupted their announcement to say that Kris Humphries was a better choice for Kim.

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cahaya 18904 desperate attention whore postings
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01-03-13, 00:49 AM (EST)
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20. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
Dear sir, I think your Hollywood reasoning is snowed under, but then, so is mine.


Smurfy snowy holiday present by agman

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qwertypie 9721 desperate attention whore postings
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01-03-13, 04:11 AM (EST)
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21. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
Ha ha ha ha ha!
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Brownroach 14241 desperate attention whore postings
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01-03-13, 11:34 AM (EST)
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22. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
There's still time: she can take care of it during the upcoming Grammys show.
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Estee 55195 desperate attention whore postings
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01-05-13, 09:44 AM (EST)
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23. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
According to our own front page, Grandma K was originally planning on selling the birth announcement news until Kanye ruined everything for her (not a surprise) and no marriage is planned (even less of a not a surprise because not-quite-divorced or not, when "baby momma" is used, no marriage ever takes place). So no six-digit payout and no change to rob a rapper blind with careful presentation of frills bills. Not a good week for Kris.

Well, she does have a new kid to exploit. That should make up for everything.

But what if it's a boy?

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cahaya 18904 desperate attention whore postings
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01-05-13, 07:07 PM (EST)
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25. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
Or worse, if it's a girl?
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Estee 55195 desperate attention whore postings
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06-14-13, 12:28 PM (EST)
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37. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
'tis.

I do wish this kid a lot of luck. I'm not sure that much luck exists...

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kidflash212 3854 desperate attention whore postings
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01-05-13, 06:51 PM (EST)
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24. "Baby Shower gift"
Some furniture made out of fungus:

Seems fitting somehow.


Capn2patch put me in motion!

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Puffy 6571 desperate attention whore postings
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01-05-13, 08:43 PM (EST)
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26. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."

Kris Humphries is legallly the father. That should make him want to sign the divorce papers quickly.
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PepeLePew13 24731 desperate attention whore postings
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01-06-13, 09:27 PM (EST)
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27. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
As seen elsewhere:

Kim Kardashian reported she hadn't experienced any nausea or vomiting yet.

That's because the rest of the world is doing it for her.

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suzzee 4956 desperate attention whore postings
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01-07-13, 04:58 PM (EST)
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29. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
True dat.


I should be watched....closely.

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jbug 16685 desperate attention whore postings
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01-07-13, 02:40 PM (EST)
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28. "You know "
you have heard this....

The world needs less Kardashians and more George Strait.

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Estee 55195 desperate attention whore postings
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03-28-13, 01:29 PM (EST)
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30. "Things you never knew."
So if the media is to be believed, up until Kim came along, every pregnant woman in human history spent her entire term losing weight.

*sigh*

Punch a paparazzi or tabloid editor today. If you don't know why they deserve it, they do.

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Snidget 43862 desperate attention whore postings
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03-28-13, 02:45 PM (EST)
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31. "RE: Things you never knew."
Yeah, I do find the look how fat she is stuff quite old already.

Amazing what happens when you go off the starvation diet a lot of stars or famous for being infamous have to stay on 99% of the time just to fit into the clothes designers give them. Although it does seem she may have gained 9 months (or more) of weight before the belly even starts to show, which makes me worry a bit about her health rather than her looks. Especially what it is going to take when the people who get stars back to size 0 in 1-2 months get a hold of her. It can't be healthy.

I just which she'd wear something appropriate for her new body rather than still trying to squish it into inappropriately tight clothes that actually only make her look fatter than properly sized clothes would. But then again they say Kanye is dressing her...so tasteful and appropriate isn't going to happen.

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Estee 55195 desperate attention whore postings
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03-28-13, 05:16 PM (EST)
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32. "Phillip already grabbed the title."
http://www.realitytvworld.com/news/west-not-naming-cd-i-am-god-1034219.php
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Molaholic 8451 desperate attention whore postings
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03-28-13, 09:02 PM (EST)
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33. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
I would reply to this but that would confirm that I actually give a rat's tookas about those major nut jobs (No, the OP is certainly NOT a nut job...)


Things could be worse. They could be forcing us to watch LOST

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Estee 55195 desperate attention whore postings
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06-14-13, 11:23 AM (EST)
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34. "Kanye reported to be cheating on Kim."
Quelle surprise.

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cahaya 18904 desperate attention whore postings
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06-14-13, 11:45 AM (EST)
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35. "RE: Kanye reported to be cheating on Kim."
And with a lady named Leyla Ghobadi? With a name like that, who could resist?

Lay la' Gobody.

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kingfish 16088 desperate attention whore postings
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06-14-13, 12:25 PM (EST)
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36. "RE: Kanye reported to be cheating on Kim."
Obviously it was Kim or her publicist reporting this, right?

Because, well, what's it been, 12 hours since she's been at the top if the Reality TV page?

Look at it from her angle, she's was getting edged down the page by the Bachelorette, of all people. It’s probably too soon to do another quick divorce bit, and she’s too pregnant to do the self-video taped sex bit again (although that might be a mistake, there may be more sex-with-pregnant-women fetish folks out there than she or her publicist thinks). She's pretty well reduced to the “He cheated on me” bit inorder to generate Kardashian buzz.

She had to do something, how dare that bitch try and steal her headlines!

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Snidget 43862 desperate attention whore postings
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06-14-13, 12:53 PM (EST)
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38. "RE: Kanye reported to be cheating on Kim."
Can't tell if they cooked it up to be in the press or someone else just needed some attention and circled these two to get some.
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Snidget 43862 desperate attention whore postings
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06-15-13, 04:51 PM (EST)
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39. "Time for the weight loss companies to start bidding, she popped!"
http://www.tmz.com/2013/06/15/kim-kardashian-gives-birth-baby-girl/

Am I bad for hoping the kidlet has a severe life-long phobia of being photographed or filmed?

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Estee 55195 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-15-13, 07:46 PM (EST)
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40. "RE: Time for the weight loss companies to start bidding, she popped!"
LAST EDITED ON 06-15-13 AT 07:47 PM (EST)

Personally, I'm just starting the countdown until Kanye officially walks out on them. Baby Mommas know no loyalty.

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kidflash212 3854 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Thong Contest Judge"

06-18-13, 12:35 PM (EST)
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42. "RE: Time for the weight loss companies to start bidding, she popped!"
"Am I bad for hoping the kidlet has a severe life-long phobia of being photographed or filmed?"

She came premature - maybe even she can't stand to be close to Kim anymore.

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Estee 55195 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-18-13, 10:11 AM (EST)
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41. "Who's her daddy?"
Kerry Rhodes would like the world to believe it's him.

http://deadspin.com/report-kerry-rhodes-is-claiming-to-be-the-father-of-ki-513865411

Is it possible? Well, it's certainly possible that he could be trying for a piece of the DAW pie, financial or otherwise. As the article notes, he's been dealing with rumors that he's gay and 'Look who I knocked up!' might have felt like an effective counter. (It's weird how no one ever considers the possibility of anyone being bisexual, isn't it?) Or he could be suicidal and looking for Kayne to orchestrate a good old-fashioned drive-by rap war. I wouldn't put his odds there at zero.

Mama K is probably thinking pay-per-view live DNA test.

One of the happier women in the world today.

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moonbaby 17013 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-18-13, 01:30 PM (EST)
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43. "Help!"
I read this and I don't know why!
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Estee 55195 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-18-13, 01:36 PM (EST)
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44. "RE: Help!"
There's only one cure. You must never walk through a supermarket checkout again.
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moonbaby 17013 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-18-13, 02:39 PM (EST)
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45. "Yipee!"
I don't like the supermarket! Hellooo peapod!
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kingfish 16088 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-18-13, 07:32 PM (EST)
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46. "RE: Yipee!"
That's what the kids are calling it these days?
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cahaya 18904 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-18-13, 08:41 PM (EST)
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47. "RE: Yipee!"
Whutevah!
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Estee 55195 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-20-13, 11:33 PM (EST)
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48. "Baby's name is --"
-- North.

North West.

So.

Yeah.

*goes into corner and cries*

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cahaya 18904 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-20-13, 11:38 PM (EST)
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49. "RE: Baby's name is --"
LAST EDITED ON 06-21-13 AT 11:40 PM (EST)

Well, it could have been worse, like Mid West.

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Snidget 43862 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-21-13, 06:30 AM (EST)
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50. "RE: Baby's name is --"
LAST EDITED ON 06-21-13 AT 06:31 AM (EST)

At least it isn't Knorth.

Is the middle name Bynorth?

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kingfish 16088 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-21-13, 08:42 AM (EST)
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51. "RE: Baby's name is --"
I like Snort.

Snerk?

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Brownroach 14241 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-21-13, 11:29 PM (EST)
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56. "RE: Baby's name is --"
He/she (what sex is it? not that I care) will grow up to fly cropdusters where there are no crops.
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tribephyl 9688 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-21-13, 03:36 PM (EST)
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52. "RE: Baby's name is --"
In an unprecedented multinational effort... Washington, Oregon, Idaho and British Columbia sign on as plaintiffs a in lawsuit claiming defamation of directionals.
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Molaholic 8451 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-21-13, 05:14 PM (EST)
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53. "RE: Baby's name is --"
Maybe she'll grow up and marry somebody named Korea.
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cahaya 18904 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-21-13, 05:21 PM (EST)
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54. "RE: Baby's name is --"
Well, a lot of people pronounce "Northwest" like "Nor-west".

And Nor is an common Arabic name for girls, meaning "light".

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Brownroach 14241 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-21-13, 11:23 PM (EST)
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55. "RE: Baby's name is --"
And I am So. yawning.
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Puffy 6571 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-23-13, 12:01 PM (EST)
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57. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
All the weathermen on TV have been talking about her.


Ready for it? The nickname is "Nori." It seems the "No" part stands for "Noel," Kim's middle name and the "ri" part stands for "Omari," Kanye's middle name.

Yawn.

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Snidget 43862 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-23-13, 02:03 PM (EST)
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58. "RE: Top Ten Reactions to the Kardashian/West pregnancy."
There is no, um, like, um, you know, um, weather to be reporting on?
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