"New Year's Resolutions from the pets." - Reality TV World Message Board Forums

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"New Year's Resolutions from the pets."

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Estee 53379 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"	12-31-12, 12:25 PM (EST)
"New Year's Resolutions from the pets."
Inspired by my Bichon-towing circlemate, who grumpily announced her dog's resolution as "I will pee on things no one has peed on before. Then I will pee on things everyone has peed on before. And then I will spend an hour outside in sub-zero wind sniffing around to make sure I didn't miss anything." Clearly making a resolution to keep.
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moonbaby 16892 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
12-31-12, 01:08 PM (EST)

1. "The family golden:"

He will keep this resolution because it repulses everyone:
"I will eat the most vile things in the yard and in the garbage and then I will immediately jump up and try to lick you on the face, breathing at you the most disgusting dead and dirty aquarium breath you ever smelled."

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kidflash212 3492 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"
12-31-12, 01:23 PM (EST)

2. "RE: New Year's Resolutions from the pets."

Zoey's (the next door neighbor's dog) resolution seems to be to continue to put paw prints on my neighbor's suit every morning as he leaves for work.

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jbug 16405 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
12-31-12, 07:55 PM (EST)

3. "RE: New Year's Resolutions from the pets."

Butch: I resolve to sleep soundly in my place at the foot of the bed until about 3 am each morning when I will wake and start hacking and coughing and getting down and back up on the bed over and over.
And once I have been taken outside, I will once again sleep like a baby while my mommy goes to work.

Butch bobble by Tribe IceButchieBounce

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Snidget 42524 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
12-31-12, 08:43 PM (EST)

4. "RE: New Year's Resolutions from the pets."

From the birds in my yard.
I will eat each color berry I can find within a mile of Snidget's house in turn and see what color it looks like when I poop on the car parked in the driveway.

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Molaholic 8204 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
01-01-13, 00:11 AM (EST)

5. "RE: New Year's Resolutions from the pets."

From Fido and O'Malley:
1) Engage in kittykrazy running throughout the house at exactly 3:07am every night, jumping from chair-to-chair.
2) Play a minimum of three rounds of poop hockey (fresh turds from litter-box preferred).
3) Fight literally tooth-and-nail any efforts to be placed in cat-carrier.

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jbug 16405 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
01-03-13, 05:04 PM (EST)

8. "RE: New Year's Resolutions from the pets."

poop hockey
*snort*
Isn't that like a double something?

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Estee 53379 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
01-04-13, 12:55 PM (EST)

13. "RE: New Year's Resolutions from the pets."

Don't be so quick to laugh. Two more weeks and he could take them to the Staples Center and charge admission.

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suzzee 4543 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Stuff Magazine Centerfold"
01-02-13, 03:19 PM (EST)

6. "RE: New Year's Resolutions from the pets."

From K.O.:
I will refuse to get off the couch in the mornings until the temperature is above freezing or daylight, whichever comes first thus making my so called mistress wonder if I will leave her a gift somewhere in the basement before she comes home for lunch.

Winterized by Agman 2009

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WyoGuy44 64 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Hollywood Squares Square"
01-03-13, 04:47 PM (EST)

7. "RE: New Year's Resolutions from the pets."

From bear* my new g.f's little doggy. I promise to bring you my little toys and lay them on your head when your trying to sleep.
and i will chew up all your socks if you leave them on the floor.

Handcrafted by Agman _{formerly known as deer. d.h.}

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Max Headroom 9983 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
01-03-13, 05:37 PM (EST)

9. "RE: New Year's Resolutions from the pets."

LAST EDITED ON 01-03-13 AT 05:38 PM (EST)
Max's resolutions:
1. Chew DW's underwear whenever the opportunity presents itself (but not when she's wearing it!).
2. Shed hair at the exact same rate it grows back.
3. Dig deep grooves in the yard by incessantly running the same routes.
4. Concentrate all bowel movements in a small area of the yard to make it a lawnmowing minefield.
5. Refuse to bark when the doorbell rings.
Not knowing my secret identity, the kids named the dog Max. Deal with it.

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WyoGuy44 64 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Hollywood Squares Square"
01-03-13, 05:43 PM (EST)

10. "RE: New Year's Resolutions from the pets."

Woke up to a minefield in the livingroom. *bad bear*

Handcrafted by Agman _{formerly known as deer. d.h.}

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Estee 53379 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
01-04-13, 09:26 AM (EST)

11. "RE: New Year's Resolutions from the pets."

Well, I knew it wasn't you. It's well-known that you only chew your DW's underwear while she's wearing it.
But everything else fit perfectly.

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Brownroach 14124 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
01-04-13, 11:34 AM (EST)

12. "RE: New Year's Resolutions from the pets."

My friend M's psychotic cat:
Continue to attempt to kill any human that tries to set foot in M's apartment.
As someone who normally loves cats, I will confidently attest to the fact that M's is the most evil feline in the history of felines. So will 27 or so of my friends.

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kidflash212 3492 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"
01-05-13, 02:42 PM (EST)

14. "RE: New Year's Resolutions from the pets."

It makes sense - Isn't M a secret agent who looks a lot like Judi Dench.

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