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"Well, hello, Holly: the lack of attrition."
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Estee 55195 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

06-09-09, 07:16 AM (EST)
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"Well, hello, Holly: the lack of attrition."
What is this, Forever Eden? 'Celebrities may come and celebrities may go, but we're going to keep the total number around nine or so for the rest of the summer.' So far, we've had four people head out -- at least, let's hope it's four: there's a good chance two of them are already back in camp with lawyers in tow -- and a pair enter the game. Never mind that Holly probably has a free week of immunity. Forget that we're stuck with someone else from The Hills because there's a chance she's not as bad as her sister and we'll have to judge her on her own lack of merits. Just remember this: weren't we supposed to be looking at a three-week show? One person goes home per week for two weeks, and then we -- what? Strip programming: it's on every night and it's always an elimination show? Final Three? Four? Seven? Bring in two fresh celebrities, raise it back to nine, and hold the thing on the air until the prize pool reaches five dollars? What?

It's an elimination show. Start eliminating people!

Or with Janice, bipeds.

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  Table of Contents

  Subject     Author     Message Date     ID  
 RE: Well, hello, Holly: the lack o... Snidget 06-09-09 1
 The Neverending Story kingfish 06-09-09 2
   RE: The Neverending Story suzzee 06-09-09 4
       RE: The Neverending Story Colonel Zoidberg 06-15-09 10
 RE: Well, hello, Holly: the lack o... vince3 06-09-09 3
   RE: Well, hello, Holly: the lack o... mindy23 06-09-09 5
       RE: Well, hello, Holly: the lack o... kingfish 06-09-09 6
           RE: Well, hello, Holly: the lack o... lizardkingvw 06-10-09 7
 I'm worried. Snidget 06-10-09 8
   RE: I'm worried. vince3 06-10-09 9
 Where's Old Whats-His-Face? foonermints 06-15-09 11

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Snidget 43862 desperate attention whore postings
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06-09-09, 07:53 AM (EST)
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1. "RE: Well, hello, Holly: the lack of attrition."
Looking at the wiki for the UK version the last several seasons seem to have very few eliminations during the first week or two then start with one a day.

Hopefully that means after the next elimination they'll start dropping like flies.

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kingfish 16088 desperate attention whore postings
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06-09-09, 08:35 AM (EST)
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2. "The Neverending Story"
In the days of yore, when men settled their disputes with their foils and witty repartee, there once was a farmgirl named Buttercup who fell in love with a strapping farmboy that worked for her father. She knew she was in love, and that was all that mattered, that and the throbbing, pulsating, rhythm of her heart beat...

Forget it, it's been done. But it (the neverending part) looks like it's being done again.

Week 2: Days of drama in which they lose one and gain at least one. Sermons are heard from the Great White belly of the beast, condescension is seen from a truly legendary DAW, one which we can only hope to emulate, and a Jungle Boy makes crappy jungle grass bling.

Week 3: Days of drama when everyone except Torri and Lou, and maybe Jungle Boy, walk off feigning some excuse, the basis for each has already been established.

Week 4: Days of Drama, because due to multiple lawsuits that are ostensibly from the departed guests, but which in fact are just part of the game plan to keep the show going forever, the show is extended for another week, and all the other guests plus one or two additional "celebs" are invited to join them in the jungle. Just for fun, one guest is banished (banished being a relative term).

Week five: Days of Drama. And Estee and Zoidberg are invited to join the others as they fight for survival and hair care products. NBC’s definition of "Celebrity" is apparently very inclusive. Again, just to keep the viewers guessing one guest is semi-temporarily banished for all time (all time being subjective).

Week Six: Days of Drama. And the question is debated, is Kingfish coming on the show? His agent denies it, as do the NBC executives who insist the campers have the final decision. But Aardvark, Kingfish’s brother, spills to TMZ that it is indeed true, Kingfish will be on the show. In a confessional, Estee declares that it is OK, she needs someone to throw into the jungle jaguar pit, and Zoid confesses that there is too much drama in camp, and he would like someone who is level headed like the Kingfish to calm down the rhetoric. And he’s tired of cleaning clean out the privy.

Week seven…

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suzzee 4956 desperate attention whore postings
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06-09-09, 09:10 AM (EST)
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4. "RE: The Neverending Story"
Week Seven: I finally can watch an entire show because Estee, Zoidberg and Kingfish have finally made me want to watch....


Fear and Loathing Tribe style 2008

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Colonel Zoidberg 3645 desperate attention whore postings
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06-15-09, 10:51 PM (EST)
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10. "RE: The Neverending Story"
Week 8: Zoidberg misses his wife and decided to leave the show because he has a great idea for an "I'm a Celebrity..." fanfic. Long story short - Queen Latifah wins.

Week 8, Wednesday: Zoidberg comes back, saying the devil made him quit. In reality, Zoidberg is just hiding from Rocco, who's still waiting on those thumbs he was promised.

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vince3 17341 desperate attention whore postings
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06-09-09, 09:01 AM (EST)
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3. "RE: Well, hello, Holly: the lack of attrition."
The coverage of the story on the front page said that the UK version did like to bring in one or two late starters each season.......

I guess this year they were looking to up the drama factor by bringing in the siblings of those already there, not realizing that Speidi were their own drama factory.......

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mindy23 1319 desperate attention whore postings
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06-09-09, 10:03 AM (EST)
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5. "RE: Well, hello, Holly: the lack of attrition."
Stepehn Baldwin came to my church once, and sat right behind me. Does that qualify me to be on this show?? You know.....my phone HAS been ringing, and the caller ID has some NBC Production, INC on it, but I didn't answer.

I thought it was a bill collector....

In another life, Kingfish. Or maybe next season? But I agree, at this rate, this show will NEVER BE OVER!!! And they will start cloning Janice and then what??

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kingfish 16088 desperate attention whore postings
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06-09-09, 11:59 AM (EST)
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6. "RE: Well, hello, Holly: the lack of attrition."
LAST EDITED ON 06-09-09 AT 12:39 PM (EST)

The cloning of Janice might not work. I don't think that the soup of Botox and silicon that passes for Janice's flesh will yield any viable DNA. Maybe if a lab analyzed several gallons of her saliva from “Lake Spitum” beside her cot?

This is, of course, a possibility which we can all fervently hope is true, as it would also preclude Joan Rivers clones (please don't remind me about Melissa).

And cheer up, the very nature of a neverending Survivor show means the odds are very much with you getting on. Especially being a RTVW peep, I mean, that has to have some currency in Reality Show casting. One would think.

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lizardkingvw 8 desperate attention whore postings
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06-10-09, 05:30 AM (EST)
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7. "RE: Well, hello, Holly: the lack of attrition."
It seems like the producers don't even know what this show is about and where to take it. It seems like they make the rules as they go. It's getting quite confusing!
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Snidget 43862 desperate attention whore postings
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06-10-09, 08:01 AM (EST)
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8. "I'm worried."
Holly really hasn't been much on The Soup or as good at getting the photogs to follow her around as her sister.

But the TVGuide said that during The Marriage of Spiedi Holly made Heidi look like the classy sister.

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vince3 17341 desperate attention whore postings
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06-10-09, 08:42 AM (EST)
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9. "RE: I'm worried."
I'm more worried about Janice seemingly taking a shine to her........
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foonermints 12302 desperate attention whore postings
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06-15-09, 11:46 PM (EST)
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11. "Where's Old Whats-His-Face?"
Ship him across the bridge over the river Styx.

Bet he could win all the food challenges, and THEN some.

What? You say he's dead? So? Fit right in.

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